YOUTH/PARENT CONNECTION

YOUTH/PARENT CONNECTION
I don’t think anything is more thrilling in a woman’s life than giving birth to another human being. Oh yes, it really feels like a miracle!
The only problem is that the little precious angel grows fast and no one, absolutely no one, knows how best to raise that child.
Mother knows best? Yeah? You wish!
Basically, as soon as you get home, baby starts doing everything at odd hours. When mom wants to sleep, baby’s crying. When mom wants to take a nap, baby wants to play. How about the times when baby cries for no apparent reason? That’s what you call on the job training, and the outcome is also going to be A MIRACLE
We all have seen two parents raise a few children and each one turns out differently. Some parents are totally satisfied with the outcome and some are shocked by the total failure of their beautiful child.
Having been exposed to my own children (three reasonably successful sons) and the children of so many overwhelmed parents (I am a judge for children who commit infractions in school) I wish to share some of my observations with you.
All babies are beautiful and therein sprout the problem!
How do you ignore a child’s cry?
How do you establish firm boundaries when a child is begging you for something over and over again to the point of rendering you numb?
How do you force your child to go to his bed when he is begging you to allow him to just fall asleep in your bed for a little bit?
How do you turn off the lights at night in the child’s bedroom when he tells you that he’s afraid in the dark?
How to you ask your child to clean his play area or do the dishes when you could do it very fast without having to listen to his whining?
How do you say no about buying a new pair of snickers when he seems so ashamed to go to school with the outdated pair – while his peers have the latest models?
How do you hold back when you feel so proud of your little one, when he seems to draw better, read better and his vocabulary and expression are so impressive?
How do you avoid putting too much emphasis on your child’s physical appearance when he seems so above average in good looks?
How do you remember all your rules and avoid breaking them -- even when breaking them seem okay -- on an especially happy or troubled day?
And, alas, assuming you are a specialist in all these, how do you maintain the equilibrium so as to avoid killing the genius in your child?
Your ability to say No and not waver, despite your child’s insistence, even when he seems to be so mad that you’re afraid of losing his love, will determine your child’s success or failure when he becomes the adult that his baby face overshadowed.
Remember, it is not necessarily true that you will love your child when he becomes an adult, just because he is your child. Love is a feeling that has to be nurtured and that evaporates when the child develops into a monster.
Let’s open a dialogue…