SelfGrowth.comThe Self Improvement Guide

About Professional DashboardDashboard Browse Topics Create Professional AccountCreate Account

Home/
Articles

Browse SelfGrowth articles

Loading the searchable article library…

SelfGrowth.comThe Self Improvement Guide

Explore experts, guides, articles, videos, and events by topic.

Explore

All topics Experts Guides Articles Videos

Platform

About SelfGrowth Websites Newsletters Events Become an Official Guide Contact

Compliance

Legal

Privacy Policy Terms and Conditions Cookie Policy

Your choices

Privacy Requests

Help improve SelfGrowth

Accounts

Personal account Create Professional Account Become a Contributor

SelfGrowth helps readers explore personal growth topics with clear paths into guides, experts, and related resources.

Home/
Experts/
Ariel and Shya Kane/
Articles

Articles by Ariel and Shya Kane

Browse published articles attributed to Ariel and Shya Kane, with full-archive search.

articles: 34

Explore

TopicsBrowse every topic ExpertsFind people ArticlesRead guidance WebsitesOpen resources EventsSee sessions VideosWatch clips

⌕

SortRecommended Most viewed Most recent Highest rated Alphabetical

Showing 1–34

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Being "Right" vs. Being "Alive" - An Excerpt from "How to Have A Match Made in Heaven: A Transformational Approach to Dating, Relating and Marriage"

<img src="http://www.transformationmadeeasy.com/matchmadeinheaven/images/mmih.jpg" align="right" height="250">In most relationships, an ongoing fight simmers just below the surface. Sometimes the conflict appears subtle but at other times it is outright war. People have grown up in a sea of discord and have been socialized to expect it and accept it. In other words, fighting is "normal."

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

3,326 views4.6/5 (10)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

So Much to Do, So Little Time to Do It!

We recently received a phone call from one of our clients. She was frantic. She couldn't get it all done. There were so many deadlines. There was so much to produce, and there was so little time. We had a conversation with her and within 10 minutes, she gave up feeling overwhelmed, had gotten back to work and by the end of the day informed us that all of the things that she thought were impossible to get done in time for the deadlines had been completed impeccably and in fact, she had even accomplished more than she dreamt was possible.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

3,379 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Slowing Down, an excerpt from "Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment"

It was a cold sunny day in New Jersey and the first thin layers of ice were forming on our pond. We were scheduled to go to Pilates that day, our private exercise class with a trainer, but we liked doing some cardio workout first. Usually, weather permitting, we would take a walk through town before our class. Even with the sun out the cold was not appealing, so we opted for a more rigorous half-hour of exercise on our treadmill and elliptical machines. Here is what happened:

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,366 views4.4/5 (13)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

***Everyday Spirituality

In this world where technology has eclipsed our humanity, many of us are looking for a way to operate in our lives that fulfills our spiritual nature. People have tried different religions or disciplines with varying degrees of success or failure. They have taken motivational workshops to try to discover some meaning to apply to their lives and many have come away wondering, "Is this all there is?" This vague sense of emptiness or dissatisfaction, can permeate our lives, even when we accomplish the goals we set for ourselves.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,202 views4.7/5 (11)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Breaking the Cycle of Unfulfilling Relationships, an excerpt from How to Create a Magical Relationship, The Three Simple Ideas T

If you want to create a working, supportive relationship with another, it is imperative that you be willing to be complete in the relationship you have with your parents. The dictionary defines complete as "lacking no component part; full; whole; entire." But what does being incomplete with your ...If you want to create a working, supportive relationship with another, it is imperative that you be willing to be complete in the relationship you have with your parents.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,571 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

A Weekend of Instantaneous Transformation with Ariel & Shya Kane

Featured in the September / October 2009 issue of Kindred Spirit Magazine, the UK's leading mind, body and spirit publication.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,185 views5/5 (8)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

When Old Habits Reemerge – Think Peppermint!

Are you proud of yourself that you no longer lose your temper, bite your finge ails, or have a messy desk? Perhaps you feel as if you have finally arrived since you no longer wait until the last minute to "do your homework". But have you ever thought that you were finished with a pesky old habit and then unexpectedly find that it is there all over again? You know: You thought you kicked a habit once and for all and suddenly, for no apparent reason, you are nibbling those nails, or procrastinating once again? Bummed when it happens? Don't worry – Think Peppermint!

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,432 views4.4/5 (10)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

How You Do Anything is How You Do Everything, Discovering Your Relationship DNA

Start with the idea that how you do anything is how you do everything and it will empower you to investigate how you relate, not just in a love relationship, but also with yourself and all others. This defuses the mindset of looking to fix what is ‘broken' and sets you on the path to ...Start with the idea that how you do anything is how you do everything and it will empower you to investigate how you relate, not just in a love relationship, but also with yourself and all others.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,469 views5/5 (6)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

***Inner Peace is an Experience, Not Something You “Know”

Serenity, well-being, feeling OK being you, feeling good in your own skin, not having to second guess your choices, trusting that you will do the right thing, these are but a few of the things we have found while working with people that most folks are striving for. People say they want inner peace but are afraid that what they might have to change about themselves will threaten what they hold to be true. So even though they say they want inner peace, they are afraid to relax into the moment and discover what else is possible.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,811 views5/5 (10)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Pink Rain

Did anyone ever say something to you that you found offensive? What did you do: walk away in a huff ... talk back to him or her ... "stand up" for yourself and then feel lousy later? Take the "high road" and feel crummy later? How about lying awake at night, rehearsing all of the better things you could have said ... smarter things you should have said ... or plotting the really good comebacks that you will lay on the offensive party next time you get the chance?

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,938 views4.8/5 (10)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

***Are You Living Your Life or Are You Just Thinking About It?

What you already "know" is keeping you from discovering what is possible. There is a story about a college professor who is interested in learning about Zen that demonstrates this idea:

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,890 views5/5 (9)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

The Vagrant Gift

At age 14 I was a willowy little thing with long blonde hair and braces. Not yet old enough to drive, I was grown-up enough to ride the bus from our town of Gresham, Oregon to downtow Portland for my orthodontist appointments. I liked going to Portland - it made me feel worldly and mature. On the way home I frequently stopped at the street corner flower vendors for a bunch of bright mini carnations to bring back for a teacher or the school librarian – just a little gift to give something back to those who were investing in me.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,373 views4/5 (12)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Happiness: What it Isn't

Happiness is a very popular theme these days and we guess it always has been. From the time we were children, we have been taught that it is better to be happy. Everyone knows it is better to be happy or joyous than sad or angry or upset or unsure of what to do with one's life. So people try, ...Happiness is a very popular theme these days and we guess it always has been. From the time we were children, we have been taught that it is better to be happy. Everyone knows it is better to be happy or joyous than sad or angry or upset or unsure of what to do with one's life.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,032 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

The Perfect You

Where did you learn what is beautiful? Where did you learn what is ugly? Where did you learn what a perfect body looks like?... And how old were you when you came to these conclusions? A few years ago when walking down the street in Paris we found ourselves taken by the body image represented ...Where did you learn what is beautiful? Where did you learn what is ugly? Where did you learn what a perfect body looks like?... And how old were you when you came to these conclusions?

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,945 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Agendas

Below is an article investigating a driving force in people's lives, their agendas. There are agendas that people are aware of and then there are those of which they are unaware. It is the latter that causes the mischief that shows up in our daily lives. In this column, we are going to identify some of the typical types of agendas the two of us have seen during the course of working with people over the past 12 years. It has been our experience that when people see what they have been doing mechanically and don't judge what they see, they then have a choice to continue their actions or not.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,936 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Stuck in a Moment

This month is the 10th anniversary of the tragedy of 9/11, 2001. Below is the transcript of an interaction we had with a participant at a Monday Night Alive! shortly after those devastating events. As we read it, we felt that that interaction is still appropriate and applicable to the lives of people today. So we are sharing this article with you to read with fresh eyes.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,758 views5/5 (8)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

The Majesty of the Moment

An excerpt from "Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment." In early September 2004, our first day offshore in Venezuela, Shya caught and released his very first white marlin using a fly rod. Photo ops abounded at this exciting acrobatic, dancing, leaping event. Earlier that day, the ...An excerpt from "Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment." In early September 2004, our first day offshore in Venezuela, Shya caught and released his very first white marlin using a fly rod. Photo ops abounded at this exciting acrobatic, dancing, leaping event.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,849 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

How You Do Anything is How You Do Everything

Start with the idea that how you do anything is how you do everything and it will empower you to investigate how you relate, not just in a love relationship, but also with yourself and all others. This defuses the mindset of looking to fix what is ‘broken’ and sets you on the path to having ...

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

2,212 views5/5 (5)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Ariel and Shya's Tips for Coping with the Economic Downtu

1. Don't panic, breathe. You are equipped to deal with whatever comes up in your life in each moment. You are not equipped to deal with hypothetical futures, which is what worrying is all about. Breathing automatically brings you back into the moment, calms and centers you. 2. Don't ... 1. Don't panic, breathe. You are equipped to deal with whatever comes up in your life in each moment. You are not equipped to deal with hypothetical futures, which is what worrying is all about. Breathing automatically brings you back into the moment, calms and centers you.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,776 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Starting Over

Have you ever found yourself in one of those moods where no matter what your partner says or does, it is all fodder for the fight? Where you are angry, disturbed and nothing he or she says or does is right or good enough to relieve your sense of aggravation? We recently met a couple involved in ...Have you ever found yourself in one of those moods where no matter what your partner says or does, it is all fodder for the fight? Where you are angry, disturbed and nothing he or she says or does is right or good enough to relieve your sense of aggravation?

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,764 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

The Embattled Mindset

We were at an appointment at a local business and the owner, Carol, blurted out, "Do you lock your car while you are here?" We replied, "Yes, always." Carol then continued with what was so obviously on her mind.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,752 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Buy a Ticket

An Excerpt from "Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment." Our assistant, Christina, came to work in the office one Saturday and we noticed that she seemed a bit subdued. She didn't look like her beautiful, lively self and so we sat down with her over a cup of coffee and asked if ...

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,843 views4.4/5 (9)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

But I Want to Be An Artist! An excerpt from Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment

One fall, my husband, Shya and I held one of our business courses called "Transformation in the Workplace," in New York City. Folks from all different fields were there to discover what it takes to experience wellbeing on the job, and how to effectively communicate. As the weekend progressed, we ...One fall, my husband, Shya and I held one of our business courses called "Transformation in the Workplace," in New York City. Folks from all different fields were there to discover what it takes to experience wellbeing on the job, and how to effectively communicate.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,689 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

So Much to Do, So Little Time!

We recently received a phone call from one of our clients. She was frantic. She couldn't get it all done. There were so many deadlines. There was so much to produce, and there was so little time. We had a conversation with her and within 10 minutes, she gave up feeling overwhelmed, had gotten ... We recently received a phone call from one of our clients. She was frantic. She couldn't get it all done. There were so many deadlines. There was so much to produce, and there was so little time.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,824 views5/5 (6)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Gravity: The Greatest Teacher

Do you remember when you learned to walk? Of course not. But whether you remember it or not, you had a great teacher: gravity. Gravity is the greatest teacher. It is never angry. It is never frustrated with you when you fall off balance. It is implacable, impartial, relentless, and uncompromising. You cannot pacify gravity by being on good behavior. Gravity is never sentimental.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,629 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Transforming Your Workplace

If you want to be happy and satisfied, it is important that you investigate how it is that you relate to your world, your workplace and to yourself. The Workplace as a Gateway to the Moment Let's look at the workplace to access how you relate to your life. By and large, most people spend the ...If you want to be happy and satisfied, it is important that you investigate how it is that you relate to your world, your workplace and to yourself. The Workplace as a Gateway to the Moment

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,613 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Adult Survivors Of Childhood

Recently, a fellow came to see us who considers himself an adult. According to the story of his life, he has survived his painful childhood. But his interpretation of the childhood which he survived comes from the distortions and misrepresentations of a child’s mind. Let’s be specific. “David” has spent many years seeing different therapists and psychiatrists, examining his childhood as a way of explaining his adult failings, depressions, and sense of insufficiency, inadequacy, and insecurity.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,587 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Coming Full 'ircle, An Excerpt from Being Here, Modern Day Tales of Enlightenment

What if you are doing your life perfectly? What if the things that you think are failings on your part are not really failings at all? Has it ever occurred to you that as a child you perfectly absorbed information from your environment, learning wholeheartedly when your brain was not yet able to disce truth from fiction nor to apply reason and thought? Our friends Amy and Andy have a beautiful little boy, Alex. We were privileged to be at the hospital when he was born and have watched him on his journey from infancy to early childhood.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,723 views5/5 (6)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Susan's First Date

It was still cool at 6:30 in the morning as we strolled barefoot with Susan dow Costa Rica's Manuel Antonio beach. We were in the midst of one of our Costa Rican Self Discovery Adventures that we hold each winter. People come from all over the world to join us and use it as a time to get away from the normal routine of one's life and relax. It is opportunity to look at the mechanics of your life in a gentle, lush environment without judging what you discover; a time to play and let your life unfold.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,437 views5/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Fun is Not a Four Letter Word

Oh, the pressure! Men and women are trying to find “The One.” When looking for a potential mate, the urge to get in there and make it work is a driving force. People are so busy looking for someone who is relationship material and finding Mr. or Ms. Right that they forget to have ... Oh, the pressure! Men and women are trying to find “The One.” When looking for a potential mate, the urge to get in there and make it work is a driving force. People are so busy looking for someone who is relationship material and finding Mr. or Ms. Right that they forget to have fun.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,632 views4.4/5 (7)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

***I Love Airports! An Excerpt from Practical Enlightenment

People were surprised when Kat stood up at one of our seminars and without preamble, enthusiastically announced, “I love airports!” It was a Monday evening in early spring and we had encouraged people to come up to the front of the room and talk about what was happening in their lives. Kat is a petite, dynamic woman in her late twenties, with shoulder length aubu hair. Standing on the balls of her feet and leaning toward the group, she grinned as she said, “Recently I flew back from the West Coast and I had a layover in Chicago where they’d had a sudden snow storm.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,962 views5/5 (2)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

***Ariel & Shya Kane's Three Tips to Creating a Magical Relationship

This Valentine's Day, couples and individuals are looking to find and/or strengthen their love relationships. As award-winning authors and world-renowned relationship experts, Ariel & Shya Kane have discovered three simple, yet revolutionary tips for creating magical relationships, based on the idea that you don't need to "work on" your relationship in order to fix it.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,857 views5/5 (1)

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

Life Is In the Blintzes, an Excerpt from "Being Here…Too, Short Stories of Modern Day Enlightenment," by Ariel and Shya Kane

When my mate al grandmother, Dora, was a child, she came to America from a tiny village in Eastern Europe. One of my fondest memories of her was that she made amazing blintzes, thin crepe-like pancakes filled with savory cheese. When I was a little boy I’d visit her in the Bronx in New York City, and we’d walk together to the store, my small hand in hers, to get fresh ingredients. Then we’d go back to her apartment and I’d watch her make my beloved blintzes. She never followed a recipe. Everything she made was by eye or by heart. The best part of all was eating them.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

1,194 views

By Ariel and Shya KaneRecently published1 topic

A Moment in Time, an Excerpt from "Being Here…Too, Short Stories of Modern Day Enlightenment," by Ariel and Shya Kane

My brother Brian was born a year and a half after I was. My mom told me that when she brought him home from the hospital, I thought he was a gift for me. When we were growing up, Brian seemed to know how to do everything without any help or training. I’d ask him, “How do you know that?” I was amazed and jealous that things seemed to come so easily for him, or so I thought.

Primary topic: Self Realization

Self Realization

999 views

Back to top ↑