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Browse published articles attributed to Barbara Becker Holstein, with full-archive search.
I remember when I was a child how much I loved my grandmother Rose Silverman's things. They were not just the functional plastic items, earthenware and stuffed sofas that most families had when I grew up. All of the furniture and things in her apartment were 'alive' with romance, magic and ...
Awhile ago, I attended a beautiful wedding. A young Jewish couple came together in joy and the room was filled with happiness. Outside of the banquet room I noticed a group of older women sitting near the door collecting charity. They all looked very pure and plain at the same time, young seniors and older seniors, nothing fancy about them. Their hips were full. They were wearing comfortable walking shoes and somewhat frumpy looking clothing. There wore either wigs or kerchiefs.
Overcoming adversity and creating a happy life sometimes requires great work on our parts. Sometimes to live a life worth living and to experience more positive emotions and to have a sense of mental wellness we have to climb mountains in terms of efforts to feel good. But thankfully, for most ...
When I was little I was very busy--as I imagine most little girls are. At six years of age I had my toys, my fire station with a real bell, my fire trucks and other cars, my paper dolls, my coloring books and large box of Crayola assorted crayons, my picture books and stuffed animals. One of ...
As winter descends we begin to feel the chill of shorter days and less sunlight. For many of us, less hours of light combined with colder temperatures results in us feel less light emotionally. For some of us, who actually have SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) gloom really sets in. This gloom ...
As a Positive Psychologist I help women find a personal sense of well-being that frees each woman to live a life of meaning, purpose and joy. May I share with you a little of my jou ey? My original research with women happened as a result of my conce s around pain that so many women ...
Many of my readers write to me about the tensions of everyday life. Not only do people wonder how to relax, but people often ask, "How do I learn to better cope with what faces me? Can THE ENCHANTED SELF help with the overwhelming frenzy of everyday life? Can it help when I am really down or ...
I am remembering and have a desire to share with you, a beautiful story told to me by a young lady. It was the end of the World War II and her dad was returning home. He came from a very close network of Italian families that lived near each other in New Jersey. n He had a ride back from where ...
A happy woman is content in her life. She feels much peace of mind and also a healthy level of enthusiasm as she goes through her day. Of course, she can become upset or angry, just like anyone else. But her happy nature works to her benefit and soon enough she will find a way to return to a pleasant state of being that we call ‘happy’ for lack of a more perfect word. How is this so? Is she from a different planet than the rest of us women? Certainly not. She simply has learned and practiced many behaviors that help regenerate a state of happiness again and again.
THE ENCHANTED SELF teaches you how to access positive states of well being again and again. These positive states are what we typically call 'happiness' and are unique to you. They actually reflect your interests, talents, and potential. In other words, what makes me happy might not make you ...
We all need a sense of wonder and mystery in our lives. Sometimes a fast paced adventure movie or a good mystery read will satisfy that urge inside of ourselves. But sometimes we need to reach into the past and see that all through the centuries people have reported strange phenomenon, and of ...
To overcome adversity and live a meaningful life that contains within it many opportunities for happiness is a healthy human goal. To get there it is important to practice two behaviors that help to make life the greatest joy ride of all. These two behaviors are staying connected and taking ...
Personal freedom is essential for happiness, for mental well-being and to feel comfortable as an Enchanted Self - someone able to access positive states of meaning again and again, while living a life of meaning and purpose. In the past I have talked about the Exodus from Egypt as a metaphorical ...
This article contains an excerpt from my book, THE ENCHANTED SELF, A Positive Therapy. The message is so important to all of us attempting to overcome adversity and to live a live of meaning and joy. I hope you enjoy the following and please try the exercise that follows. Time continues to ...
Why would a psychologist take her hand to fiction? Of course because I want people to overcome adversity and live a life worth living, filled with positive emotions. But even more specifically to my own disposition, I am a kind of visionary in the sense that I am always looking for new ways ...
Life is the greatest roller coaster ride we will ever take. The ups and downs, the unexpected changes, the twists and turns, are all a part of living. The roller coaster ride of life can be miserable and uncomfortable or exciting and rewarding. Our states of mind and body are key factors in how ...
In my years as a psychologist, I have come to believe that most people seeking psychotherapy are unhappy. This is not only due to earlier hurts and traumas, as well as present frustrations and problems, but because they cannot access earlier happy moments often enough. The unfortunate result is ...
How do we overcome adversity? How do we create a life worth living? How do we manage to have more positive than negative emotions? How do we get happy and how do we stay happy, most of the time? See the answer below! Discovered: The Secret Ingredient to Happiness is Ourselves! As many of you ...
We have so much influence over the next generation! Lots of times we forget how much influence, as our children or grandchildren can appear to ignore us, forget us or even worse--run from us in one way or another. Sometimes, we must just accept the fact that lots of times positive actions happen ...
Sometimes it is helpful to review several of the basic components of THE ENCHANTED SELF as it is a positive psychology system designed to help overcome adversity, experience more positive emotions, think more positively and succeed in living a life worth living that is rich in happiness, purpose ...
How do we overcome adversity and live a life of meaning, a life worth living? How do we get to the 'good life' with good mental health? How do insure that our positive emotions rather than negative will have the front row seat in our minds? One way is preparation for the change of seasons and ...
When I was a small child, I watched many movies in the Shawmut Theater in Roxbury. It was located close to Eagleton Square, which was bustling with activity and safe years ago. Today you don’t venture there if you value your life. The Shawmut was more than a movie house. It was a community ...
In private moments we may find ourselves reflecting upon our lives, what could have been, how we might have overcome adversity, and our true potential. We often cast our hopes and dreams aside, and then experience feelings of disillusionment or emptiness. We feel cheated of our inalienable ...
Each season requires special behaviors and activities on our part to optimize for ourselves living a purposeful and happy life. We actually have to practice our positive emotions, just as the champion tennis player practices her swing. We have to try to use our mental capacities as fully as ...
Welcome to a world where happiness is a possible mental and emotional state at least a good part of the time. Welcome to the Enchanted Self Positive Psychology Concepts where I teach you how to generate a life worth living that has meaning, value and integrity for you. Unique to your mental ...
It's a great time of year to think about the pleasures and happiness of a vacation. They are real and can help us build the strength to overcome adversities the rest of the year. A good vacation can fill us with a sense that we are living a life worth living. Also, the pleasures of positive ...
There was a time when I too, was a child. The future of being a Positive Psychologist for Women was not even a dream on the horizon. But even as a child, like you, I wanted to be happy. I wanted to live a life worth living and to feel good inside. I might not have had the sophisticated ...
The Rebbe Nachman of Breslow often said, “Always remember-Joy is not merely incidental to your spiritual quest. It is vital.” As the years have gone by and I’ve been in the practice of psychology over 20 years, I have become more and more convinced that he was so right, that joy is not an ...
Once upon a time there was a Princess who set out on a raft to find the Enchanted Forest. She took with her a canteen full of hopes and dreams, minimal provisions, and outdated maps. The raft swayed. the wind blew. It was too cold. It was too hot. She was hungry. She was tired. She was scared. ...
Finding out how to live a life worth living and being able to overcome the adversities that befall all of us in a normal lifetime, while also experiencing enough positive emotions to feel happy much of the time, may sound like a tough assignment. But if you can just be true to yourself and ...
Many of my readers write to me about the tensions of everyday life. Not only do people wonder how to relax, but people often ask, “How do I learn to better cope with what faces me? Can THE ENCHANTED SELF help with the overwhelming frenzy of everyday life? Can it help when I am really down or ...
For many of you it is about to be Easter, for those who are Jewish, as I am, Passover is just around the corner! I thought it would be interesting to share with you some thoughts about Passover that are so universal in nature that we can all learn from them! n Passover gives us the chance to ...
How do we obtain a life worth living? How do we overcome adversity? How can we experience positive emotions? How do we stay in good mental health? These are serious questions and to briefly answer them would be unfair to the reader. But I can say as a positive psychologist, working in the ...
I am remembering and have a desire to share with you, a beautiful story told to me by a young lady. This story fills me with positive emotions. It was the end of the World War II and her dad was returning home. He came from a very close network of Italian families that lived near each other in ...
THE ENCHANTED SELF is a positive psychology technique that helps you utilize your positive memories, your talents, and your capacities for joy and happiness. You may not realize that one of your most precious gifts in terms of accessing joy is your capacity to utilize your memory in positive ...
Over my lifetime I have never tired of watching Lucille Ball in action. Oh, what ecstasy in my childhood to finish a dreary Monday by watching Lucy come to grips with her life in hysterical ways! She gave me courage to believe as a little girl that one could overcome adversity,have a life ...
One of the ways that we overcome adversity and live a life worth living, experiencing lots of positive emotions and staying mentally well is by being open to the concept of mentoring. Mentoring and learning from each other is much more that taking a course or explicitly giving someone advice ...
Welcome to a world where happiness is a possible mental and emotional state at least a good part of the time. Welcome to the Enchanted Self Positive Psychology Concepts where I teach you how to generate a life worth living that has meaning, value and integrity for you. Unique to your mental ...
I remember when I was a child how much I loved my grandmother Rose Silverman's furniture and her household goods. They were not just the functional plastic items, earthenware and stuffed sofas that most families had when I grew up. All of the furniture and things in her apartment were 'alive' ...
I invite you to read about how Rebecca Trelfa put beauty, meaning and form into her home. Her story is different from my story about my grandmother and how her things have enriched my life, as each of ours stories are different. Don't forget, you have a story, too! Building Enchantment By ...
As a positive psychologist I am delighted to share this excerpt from my book, The Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy with you. This article reveals the way that I initially began to reclaim my own Enchanted Self, resulting in my finding new ways to overcome adversity, experience positive ...
As we pass through the Seven Gateways to Happiness again and again and become a true Enchanted Self, we see that life is all about living and then telling and retelling the stories of our lives to get the most positive juice from our stories. If we know how to 'juice' the richness out of life, ...