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Articles by Bobbi Palmer

Browse published articles attributed to Bobbi Palmer, with full-archive search.

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By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

3 Online Dating “Do’s” to Keep You Happily Meeting Men

You can meet the spectacular, special man who is going to be your life partner using online dating. I met the love of my life on www.match.com, so of course I recommend it to all my friends, coaching clients, in my workshops…really to anyone who will listen! Here are three things I recommend you keep in mind as you travel on your journey meeting men using online dating. (Yep…it is a journey and, yes, you meet men online…you really don’t date them there.) #1. Be the Boss

Primary topic: Dating

2,716 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Dating Over 40: Why He's Not Asking You Out (Part 2)

Continuing from yesterday, it's important to make yourself memorable when you are dating. There are tons of women out there; you want to be the one he wants to know. When you follow this advice and get your story out in the right way, the guys who are good matches will take notice. They are getting to know you (sometimes) in one conversation…so make it count! 1. Get out that shiny stuff.r

Primary topic: Dating

2,593 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Do All Men Make You Mad? The Bitter Woman

Do All Men Make You Mad? (FemiType #5: The Bitter Woman) In an effort to help you understand the man side of this midlife dating experience, I’ve introduced you to The Princess, The 18 Year Old, The Scaredy Cat and The Wow-Me Woman: all FemiTypes* that send good men running. Today I’m going to talk about perhaps the most challenging of all FemiTypes: The Bitter Woman. She is a little scary, a lot angry, and all about being a victim. Not only does she scare and briefly traumatize the men she meets, but her bitte ess probably seeps into all areas of her life.

Primary topic: Dating

2,588 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Is Something Surprisingly Simple Keeping You From Finding Him?

<img src="http://datelikeagrownup.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/Eyeliner-like-a-Pro.jpg" width="223" height="167"> I learned something this week that completely rocked my world: when you apply eyeliner, you should start from the inside of your lid, not the outside.

Primary topic: Dating

2,565 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Online Dating: How to Get Started and Make it Work

As if dating and mating wasn’t hard enough, technology has added a variety of new challenges to the art of hooking up. Not only do you have to master the computer crud, you have to figure out how to actually connect with another human being amidst the volume and the anonymity.

Primary topic: Dating

2,524 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***8 Ways to Prevent Turning to Mush around Single Men

I've heard the same thing from so many women this week that I had to ask you if this sounds familiar: "I'm generally a very friendly, confident gal...unless I'm in the company of a single man—especially one I'm attracted to. In that case I turn into mush." Why is it that when we meet or date attractive guys—even at 40, 50 or 60—we can become an Alien Woman from Planet WTF? If you're anything like I was, sometimes it was hard to recognize the woman sitting in front of an attractive or available man.

Primary topic: Dating

2,471 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Are You Attracting Cads and Pingers?

Let me start today by telling you how magnificent you are. The fact that you are a woman over 40 and reading this tells me that you are all the more spectacular. Really, it does!

Primary topic: Dating

2,458 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***How to Write a Killer Email and Get Dates Online

Want to know the number one trick to meeting men online and getting dates? Learn how to write a killer email. When I was online, I remember how it felt. I’d send an endless number of emails that seemed to go into the pit of Internet rejection hell. The truth is, there is a lot of competition out there—especially if you’re a woman dating over 40. Move into your 50s and 60s, and the competition gets downright fierce. Having a fantastic profile is a must, but coupling that with the art of writing emails sets you up to be a surefire winner in the game of I-love.

Primary topic: Dating

2,445 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***How Your Dating Can Help Your Daughters

If you're a Mom with children still at home, I'm sure you have conce s about how your dating might affect your kids’ lives. Issues such as jealousy and challenges with time-sharing are real. But I’d like you to consider the positives. Yes, it’s true that "a happy Mother is a good Mother." But I also believe that Moms who date have a great opportunity to teach their kids – especially their daughters – essential lessons about taking care of themselves and interacting with boys. -------------r

Primary topic: Dating

2,433 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Dating Over 40: Why He’s Not Asking You Out (Part 1)

I can answer this in three words: You’re not memorable. That’s it. Whether it’s the hot man you had a nice chat with at the local coffee shop or the guy you had a great first date with, getting him to ask you out can take some skill. Yep, I said skill. You’re not 18 anymore, and the men you are interested in (or should be) are mature men of depth. They have busy lives (like you) and would probably rather be single than in a bad relationship (like you).

Primary topic: Dating

2,432 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Should I Waste My Time Meeting or Dating an “Imperfect” Guy?

30 minutes. That’s about how long you generally have to “get to know” a man before deciding to have a cup of coffee or date with him. You meet online, or at the local bank, and that’s about it. But he seems imperfect. He’s clearly missing one of your must-haves. Should you gracefully decline? After all, you have very little time to waste, right?

Primary topic: Dating

2,407 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Do You Actually Know When You're Being Rejected?

Rejection can be a very good thing. Until you find the man who brings you the love and joy you deserve, you should thank the men who reject you. These men are doing you a favor. I think they know – consciously or not – that they won’t be able to give you what you need; and they know it before you do. I blogged about this last week. If you haven’t, you should read Why You Should Be Happy When a Man Rejects You. One of my spectacular coaching clients commented on that post today. And basically she said that she hoped the man she is stuck on rejects her. I say he already has.

Primary topic: Dating

2,384 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Four Ways to Flirt with Flair and Class

No matter your age, the way to connect with a man in the "I think you're hot and would be interested in going out with you" way is to flirt. When I suggest that to the over-40 women in my dating workshops and coaching programs, I can see them cringe. Most of these otherwise outgoing women have no idea how to flirt, and many consider it childish and classless. I have news for you. Here is what you get when you don't flirt with nice men: a nice conversation. That's it. But you're not looking for a buddy, right? You want to be asked out.

Primary topic: Dating

2,329 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Dating? (Exactly) What to Say to Men in Difficult Situations

In dating, good communication is the key to meeting and attracting men…especially the right men. It's also the key to developing and maintaining fulfilling relationships. One of the most important ways I support my coaching clients (www.datelikeagrownup.com/coaching) is by helping them communicate well with men. Online or offline, good communication requires certain knowledge and skill. It's a bit of an art, actually. When challenging situations come up, I help women write a script that not only communicates effectively but also feels comfortable and true to who they are.

Primary topic: Dating

2,325 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

New Ideas for Things to Do This Weekend

When I was single I had a love/hate relationship with weekends. I loved having the extra time off work; I hated that I didn’t have a man to spend the time with. The truth is, though, that I didn’t need a man to have fun or accomplish something meaningful. In many cases, I just needed ME!

Primary topic: Dating

2,252 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***The Secret to Being a Happy Dater

Why is it that when we date — even at 40, 50, or 60 — we can become an alien woman from planet WTF? If you’re anything like I was, it’s sometimes difficult to recognize yourself when you’re in the presence of a hot, nice, or simply available man. The beliefs and habits of our 25 or 30 year old can be hard to shake. Here’s what I finally learned, that I want you to know: You are a grownup woman. You know who you are, what you want, and you’re in charge in the other parts of your life, right?

Primary topic: Dating

2,219 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Will He Like You Naked?

Are you excited about the notion of hopping into bed with your new guy? Slowly undressing…eyes locked…savoring each other’s bodies…lust so intense that you both might explode… …or does the thought of it make you so nervous you want to puke? Let’s face it: if you’re working on attracting a fabulous man into your life, ya’ better be ready for sex. I know that for many of you—especially if you’re dating in your 40s, 50s, or beyond—it’s been a while since you stood naked in front of a man.

Primary topic: Dating

2,213 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Why Every Single Woman Should Use a Vibrator

Masturbation. There…I said it. The "Big M." I don't generally talk about this, so it may shock you. But the time has come to chat about the role sex – or lack thereof – plays in the life of a woman in her later years who is single and looking for love.

Primary topic: Dating

2,169 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Answering the $1 Million Question: Is He In To You?

Answering the $1 Million Question: Is He In To You? At least half of all the emails I get from wonderful women who are over 40 and looking for love are about the same question you’ve probably been asking since you were a teenager: “Is he in to me?” Often the answer is: If you have to ask, he’s probably not.

Primary topic: Dating

2,151 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

How to Tell if He Is Second-Date Worthy

I read this quote recently: I love that feeling of being in love, the effect of having butterflies when you wake up in the morning. That is special. ~ Jennifer Aniston I love her, and no offense meant, but how has that butterfly-thing been working for Jen so far?

Primary topic: Dating

2,150 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

The One Word You Can Use to Magnetize the Right Man

A single man I know once said: If a woman I'm interested in doesn't seem to love herself, why should I love her...and trying to convince her that she's great would be too exhausting. When a man meets this kind of woman he may be attracted initially, but after figuring out that she is a project (one he doesn't care to take on), he will soon disappear. Your phone won't ring after the first or second date because if you're not keen on yourself, a good man takes that as a signal to run. It makes sense. Think about how you judge a man as a good potential mate.

Primary topic: Dating

2,115 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***How to Turn Fear of Dating into Fun Dates

When you think of dating – especially online dating – do you feel any fear? Do you get even a tiny twinge of terror? If your answer is "yes," you are not alone. In fact, I think you're among the majority. The women I'm coaching often tell me about situations they describe as "scary." Here are some examples: • He wants to meet in person after just one email. • He asked her where she lived. • He's beginning to get touchier and seems to want sex; she likes him but is not ready. • He texted her with a question loaded with sexual innuendo.

Primary topic: Dating

2,032 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Are You Ready to Teach and Tame Her? (FemiTypes - The Epilogue)

<img src="http://datelikeagrownup.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Commitment_Success_Man-and-Woman-happy..jpg" /> Over the past few months I’ve profiled six types of women – I call them FemiTypes – who have less than healthy relationships with men. I’ve written about The Princess, The 18 Year Old, The Scaredy Cat, The Wow-Me Woman, The Bitter Woman and The Sexpot. Why have I written about women when you really want to know about men? Because I know it will help lead you get to where you want to be: in a loving relationship with a man who is devoted to you.

Primary topic: Dating

2,026 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***One Thing You Can Stop Doing to Improve Your Dates and Relationships

Raise your hand if you can accurately read the minds of your girlfriends. My guess is that, at least for a few, you actually can. Larry and I can read each other’s minds at times. When you’ve spent about 2000 days with someone you love, that happens. (It’s not always a good thing, btw.) Now, raise your hand if you can accurately read the minds of the men you are dating or have had short relationships with. Anyone? Okay, now raise your hand if you’ve tried to read the minds of the men you are dating or have had short relationships with. I bet you have, and I bet you can’t.

Primary topic: Dating

1,862 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Can I Find Love When I Have Serious Life Problems?

I received an email yesterday that I want to share. I hear some form of this a lot: “I’m [not perfect because of fill-in-the-blank] and I’m worried no man will ever want me!” I get it but I can’t tell you how much this breaks my heart. I lived in the “no man wants a fat girl” reality for a long freaking time. But it’s a lie I told myself so I could blame men for the lack of love in my life.I know the truth now: the vast majority of the men I met didn’t pick me because of my “Wall of I Dare You” and my insecurities; not because of my fat thighs.

Primary topic: Dating

1,837 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Delicious Life Lessons I Learned from My Father

My Dad died. There…I said it out loud. Even though I was by his side and saw him take his very last breath, it’s been hard to believe he’s gone forever. F-o-r-e-v-e-r. I wanted to write this article for Thanksgiving so I could publicly thank him and show my gratitude. How trite, I thought. It doesn't do him justice. So I write now. On a dreary Friday in November. Just another day like every single day since October 2 when I think of him and wish he were here.

Primary topic: Dating

1,831 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Online Rejection: There’s No Such Thing!

This is one skill I want you to master: Rejecting online rejection. Learning to accept rejection gracefully, with as few “dings” to your self-esteem as possible, is key to finding your true love. As a dating coach, I’ve found the #1 reason you won’t have success online is giving up too soon. What you perceive as online rejection can exhaust you mentally and the positive attitude you started out with will quickly dwindle. Here are 4 things to know to help you move forward in the online dating world with your self-esteem intact! 1) They don’t know you.

Primary topic: Dating

1,815 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

What Is Your Online Dating IQ?

I know I sound like a broken record about the benefits of dating online, especially if you are single and over 40. I’m going to continue to nag you about this because I want what you want: for you to find the man of your dreams, and to never let each other go. Getting online is the best way to make that happen. Go ahead, take the test, I promise you’ll learn things about how to meet the RIGHT MEN online, the RIGHT way. Like your mother used to say “You’ll thank me later.” True or False:

Primary topic: Dating

1,812 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Ten Tips to Kick-Start Positive Change

All right, ladies. I trust we all got through Valentine’s Day, right? But let's make this your last February fourteenth when you don’t have a fab date! To do that, you’re going to have to make some changes. Put simply, stagnation is never good. When you refuse to change or embrace new challenges, you’re not going to get any of the good stuff that comes with opening yourself up to new experiences. What’s keeping you from doing that? If you’re reading this, I can only assume you want to find a fantastic man to share your life with. How long have you been on the soul mate search?

Primary topic: Dating

1,784 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Are You Dating Like a Grownup?

I’m often asked what I mean by Dating Like a Grownup. It’s obviously a great question that I probably should answer every so often. (I am, after all, the CEO of Date Like a Grownup!) I’m going to give you my definition, and then I’m going to tell you about a great book I’ve read that does a terrific job of discussing dating and love for grownups.

Primary topic: Dating

1,765 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Why You're Still Single

One of my clients recently said, “I don’t think there’s something wrong with me; I just think I’m doing something wrong.” Bingo. The majority of women who come to me for help with dating and relationships lack confidence. Most are sure something is wrong with them. What else would explain why they are still single at this time in their lives? Is that you? Have you ever had the feeling that maybe you’re not lovable or men just don’t want “a woman like you?” Well, I’m here to tell you that it’s not something wrong with you…it’s just that you’re doing something wrong.

Primary topic: Dating

1,755 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Given a Chance, How Men Can Surprise You!

Are you resisting letting men help you or do nice things for you? Maybe you’re thinking it threatens your independence or makes you seem weak. Or maybe you’re just trying to be low-maintenance; thinking that this is what men want. As I’ve said time and time again, letting a man do for you – especially since you don’t neeeeeed him to – is the greatest gift you can give him and…in turn…yourself. Here is a letter I received from a client of mine who is graduating from my Mastering the Mystery of Meeting Men telecourse. She finally got it, and get’s a “A” for sure. ————— Bobbi,

Primary topic: Dating

1,746 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Imperfection Does Not Equal Rejection

Are you perfect? Do you know anyone who is? Look at the people you know, especially those in midlife or older. Do you know anyone who hasn't had some rough times behind them or who are not currently facing life challenges? It’s doubtful, because this is real life; not the movies. Those of us who have lived full lives have some less-than-flattering “stuff” surrounding us. I received an email recently from Lisa, a woman who, after describing her life situation, asked: “Is there any hope for me?” Ugh. I can’t tell you how sad this makes me feel.

Primary topic: Dating

1,737 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Two Simple Thoughts That Will Change the Way You Date

My guess is that you’ve been dating a while and not getting great results. You’re here reading this, after all. The best way to shift into having dates that render positive outcomes – like having more fun and eventually meeting The One – is to change the way you talk to yourself before you even leave the house. Whether it’s a meet-date or a date-date, there are two things you can tell yourself that will improve your chances of meeting Mr. I Love You. And here’s the great thing about this: it’s 100% in your control. (After all, we do love our control, don’t we?)

Primary topic: Dating

1,665 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***How to Talk to Men (in a Way That They Like!)

Not only is it okay to talk about yourself to men, but it is 100% essential to getting first dates and future dates. When I tell women that it’s GOOD to talk about themselves, it’s generally met with complete shock. But don’t guys love it when we let them do all the talking?

Primary topic: Dating

1,639 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Why You Might Want to Stop Looking for a Man

I know you say you're looking for a loving and committed man to share your life, but I have to ask...have you found yourself yet? I know you've heard this before and it sounds trite, but everyone says it for a good reason. If the answer to the question is no, beats me, or who cares...then you probably have a few steps to take before you're going to attract Mr Right. Here's what I propose: stop focusing on him and start focusing on you.

Primary topic: Dating

1,623 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

Nine Ways to Make Your Date Great (in the First Ten Minutes!)

The first 10 minutes of a date often determine whether a second date is even going to happen. And let's face it: second dates are not the norm for many. That was definitely my story until I learned about (what I now call) "Date Waste." Date waste is when a date is a drag but has little to do with whether you're a potential match. It's a drag simply because neither of you set the date up to succeed. These aren't the dates with jerks that you can't wait to end. They're the ones that are just a little boring, lack sparks, or just go nowhere. You can turn these into very positive experiences.r

Primary topic: Dating

1,601 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Key #4 to Finding Hope and Finding Him: Time to Get Out and Trail Blaze

This is the third in a series of articles sharing my 5 Keys to Finding Hope and Finding Him. The 5 Keys are: M - Me and Me first. A - Assess your list. S - Shed your stuff. T - Time to get out and Trail blaze. R - Real women find their man. I say you need to Trail Blaze because, as you know, he’s not comin’ knocking on your door. You have to make a plan and get out of your house. I’m going to be honest with you: this part can be what stops you in your tracks.

Primary topic: Dating

1,528 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***What Are Your Dating and Relationship Rules

Have you ever asked yourself this question: What are my rules for dating and relationships? What are my boundaries, what must I do, and what must I have? And what will I simply not tolerate in myself or in others? Too often I talk to women who stayed in unfulfilling relationships or have a history of dating jerky men. When I ask questions and get their story, here's what it is usually about: the man was interested so they went along. They thought that he was all they could have, they didn't want to hurt his feelings, they just wanted a man in their life…there are several reasons.

Primary topic: Dating

1,517 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***5 Must-Know Tips for Boomer Women Dating Online

Dating sites report that their fastest growing segment are people over 50. My clients, women ranging from 35 – 65, are having great success with it. Face it: online dating is the new hot spot for people who wouldn’t dream of meeting someone in a bar. You know I’m a huge proponent of online dating. I met my husband on Match.com when I was 47. He was 57. That man is the best part of my life. I love the idea of finding companionship and love using online dating.

Primary topic: Dating

1,468 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

[Video]How Do I Tell Him I Have Herpes?

If you are over 40 and dating, it is extremely likely that you have something about your past or your present you’re afraid to share when you meet new men. As I talked about in my last Grownup Girls’ Night Out, there is a good time AND a good way to talk about your “baggage.”

Primary topic: Dating

1,431 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

[Video] What To Do When It Doesn’t Work Out

To Watch Video Click Here I had a disappointment today. I blew an opportunity to do well at something that was super important to me. I was struggling to find a way to fix it…to make it right. So I thought: What would I tell another sister to do in this situation? I came up with the answer that worked for me, and I moved on.

Primary topic: Dating

1,391 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

How to Shake Up Your Love Life This Weekend [Video]

To Watch Video Click Here Do you feel like you're in a bit of a rut? Sometimes, especially when we're older and haven't dated for a while, we can start feeling bored, boring or invisible when it comes to men. I recorded this video to help you shake things up! With very little effort you can start feeling more beautiful, more confident and more like a woman who really wants love in her life. That, girlfriend, is exactly what attracts men!

Primary topic: Dating

1,348 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

One Surprising Way Men Help Us While Hurting Us

It’s your fear of rejection that is getting you rejected. ~~ Bobbi Palmer I know…I write about rejection a lot: how to recognize when it is and isn't real; how there’s no such thing as rejection when you’re meeting guys using online dating; and how to learn from it, recover and move on to the next guy who will be better for you. (Yes! There WILL be a next guy!) When we say rejection hurts, it really does HURT.

Primary topic: Dating

1,335 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

How to Magnetize the Men You Like: Top Tips [Video]

To Watch Video Click Here Since you all can't all attend my upcoming Live Event "The Art of Magnetizing Men", I wanted to share my #1 Top Tip for being a midlife man magnet. Then I figured: why not invite my two guest experts to share theirs! Let me know your thoughts!

Primary topic: Dating

1,334 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

How to Say “No” (Whether You Like Him or Not) [Video]

To Watch Video Click Here What do you do when a man asks you out and you aren’t interested? Are you worried about hurting his feelings? I get this question quite frequently because, after all, we want to please men, right? Here are my simple tips for how to say “no” to a guy you don’t want to see again (don’t worry…he can take it) AND how to say no to a guy you DO want to see….but he’s just doing something that kinda bugs you. (You might be surprised at what I’m telling you!)

Primary topic: Dating

1,316 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

How to Answer Those Personal Questions You Don’t Want to Answer [Video]

To Watch Video Click Here Were you at last Friday’s Grownup Girls’ Night Out Live Man Panel? I had three men — ages 40s, 50s and 70s – generously share their thoughts and feelings about what attracts them to women, what to do on dates, how to tell if a man is into you…and much more. It was spectacular.

Primary topic: Dating

1,305 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

[Video] How Do I Get Myself to Think Nice Guys Are Hot?

To Watch Video Click Here Last weekend was my live event in Los Angeles: Mastering the Art of Magnetizing Men. During this two-day event I gave women tons of advice and step-by-step tips to help them attract quality men so they could finally meet their loving lifetime partner.

Primary topic: Dating

1,243 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

[Video] Dating New Men: How to Tell Him the Scary Stuff

To Watch Video Click Here Ungrateful children. Mortgage that’s killin’ you. Surgical scars. Chronic health problems…these are all realities of life after 40. Let’s face it: we’ve been around a while. We have “stuff!” When you’re dating it’s important to share it at the right time in the right way. Say it wrong or tell him too early or too late, and you may scare away a good man.

Primary topic: Dating

1,228 views

By Bobbi PalmerRecently published1 topic

***Make Your List, But Consider It Twice (Or Thrice!)

Can you use a dating pick-me-up? Something to boost your hope of finding your fabulous life partner? If you’re wondering if dating and the nonsense that sometimes comes with it is worth it, read on. I have a spectacular success story to share, along with advice on two simple things that will bring you the same success. I received the following email last week from a woman I coached several months ago: Hi Bobbi,

Primary topic: Dating

1,194 views

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