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Browse published articles attributed to Jody Johnston Pawel, with full-archive search.
Many professionals who dispense parenting advice tell parents to use rewards or create "behavior modification" token systems to teach children a skill, to get children to take on a responsibility, or to curb an unwanted behavior or habit. Often, however, rewarding good behavior with behavior ...
I am a Licensed Social Worker, Certified Family Life Educator who has been training parents for over 25 years. As a second-generation parent educator, however, I’ve been involved with parenting classes for almost 40 years, because my parents taught classes while I was growing up. (Read my bio. for more info.) Because I had such a head start, I spent the first 10 years of my career collecting and compiling the parenting skills that research has proven to be effective long-term. In the process, I discovered, developed and tested a system for responding effectively to any parenting challenge.
‘Tis the season for Fall sports — when parents spend more time at playing fields or driving to games than they spend at home. At the game, parents enthusiastically cheer their child’s team and discuss the game on the car ride home. While most parents have good intentions, they can inadvertently discourage a child and promote unhealthy competition if they don’t choose their words carefully. First, let’s define the difference betwee "healthy" and "unhealthy" competition: Healthy competition focuses on doing one’s best, having fun, and learning skills.
This month our family is experiencing two major transitions. Our youngest child is entering high school and our oldest is starting college out of town, in an apartment with three strangers. Each has brought unique challenges to my children — and us, their parents. Our experiences have reinforced the importance of the lessons we taught our college-bound child and those we need to focus on with our high-schooler. The High School Years Entering high school is simultaneously scary and exciting for teens, because of all the unknowns.
As a parenting expert to the media, I usually do extra media interviews during the holidays. Usually the topics focus on the extra stress of hectic holiday schedules or my “Taming the Holiday Gimmees” article. This year, I've been getting some thought-provoking questions about ...
Come on, admit it. You intended to keep a schedule this summer, but when the kids slept in you liked the extra quiet time. Then the daylight lasted so long it was often later than you realized when the kids finally hit the sack. Not living by the clock was a refreshing change of pace, but school will be starting in a few weeks and you know the kids and you need to get back into the groove. First, let me assure you, it's healthier to have a flexible schedule than a rigid one. So have no guilt about your summer schedule.
I recently was asked by another mother at home, "What do you find most difficult about being an at-home mother?" I replied, "No sick leave, days off, or vacation time. Hey, let's form a union!" We both laughed at the idea of a mothers' union, but we realized we already had the next best ...
The new world of school brings many changes. Even for children who have been in child care or preschool, starting kindergarten will be a new world that is quite different from what they've experienced. The school's rules might be different from your rules, so children must learn flexibility. ...
Imagine this scene: A neighbor is at your house, visiting over a cup of tea. You start feeling irritated and pressured when you realize you are running late for an appointment. What would you say to your neighbor? Imagine the same situation, except it's your child at the breakfast table. How ...
As children return to the classroom, parents often wonder how they can help their children succeed in school — without doing too much for their children. There are two key areas in which parents have tremendous influence: success attitudes and skills. A successful school attitude is ...
When parents have a problem or concern, they need to keep their cool and use non-blameful ways to communicate their feelings. As soon as parents threaten or blame, children stop listening and start thinking about how to defend themselves. If you want others to listen to your feelings or ...
Come on, admit it. You intended to keep a schedule this summer, but when the kids slept in you liked the extra quiet time. Then the daylight lasted so long it was often later than you realized when the kids finally hit the sack. Not living by the clock was a refreshing change of pace, but school ...
Homework is a child’s responsibility, so we need to be careful how much we help. We want to be aware of what our children are doing and be involved in helpful ways, but not help too much. Avoid the word "we" — it implies that homework is our responsibility. Say, "When are you going ...
Every New Year, many of us set goals and resolve to meet them — only to become discouraged and quit. Here are suggestions for removing the most common barriers blocking our success — in parenting, our careers, marriage...and Life! First, set attainable goals. To illustrate, consider ...
Gift-giving season has begun. If you’re like me, you fantasize about the moment your children open their gifts: their faces light up with surprise and excitement, they give you a hug and say, “Thanks, I love it!” To reach that moment, however, we often have to survive that ...
Imagine this scene: A neighbor is at your house,visiting over a cup of tea. You start feeling irritated and pressured when you realize you are running late for an appointment. What would you say to your neighbor? Imagine the same situation, except it's your child at the breakfast table. How ...