Loading the searchable article library…
Browse published articles attributed to Louis LaGrand, with full-archive search.
Is it a bit unusual to have a conversation with a deceased loved one? Do many people do this? And are there any benefits to such action? What will my friends think if they find out? These questions are not uncommon in the thoughts of those mou ing the death of a loved one. These questions are the result of a scientifically oriented culture.
Has it been weeks since the death of your loved one and you still feel sluggish with low energy levels? Are you hesitant in making decisions? Confused? Is hope draining out of you and all you think about is a bleak future? It is not unusual to suffer physical and emotional depletion when mou ing. Adapting to the loss of a loved one is always a major challenge and calls for a new awareness and the development of new routines without the presence of the beloved. We all must meet change by changing.
Fear is arguably the most common hidden emotion that mou ers delay confronting. The reason is obvious: no one wants to appear weak. Of course, that is inbred societal nonsense that we have all been subjected to since fear is an expected response whenever we feel threatened by circumstances that have to be faced.r
You can reduce unnecessary suffering when grieving by limiting the time you either knowingly or unknowingly isolate yourself. Self-imposed isolation is a common response to the death of a loved one. Although some alone time is necessary during all grief work, the bereaved all too often withdraw ...
Pain, whether emotional or physical, is a condition of existence. No matter what your station in life, you are bound to confront relationship separations, work conflicts, medical difficulties, or the death of a loved one. No one escapes these circumstances of life and the pain they ...
Meaning affects everything we do; and equally important it affects the body and its physiology as attested to by the many examples of body-mind relationships, such as the placebo effect. Finding meaning in death is not always easy, and sometimes it is hard to find. However, the search for ...
Do you feel stuck in your grief? Has it been months since your loved one died and you feel you should be feeling better? Do others close to the deceased seem to be adapting more quickly than you? Has the pain gotten worse? These are questions with very individual answers. They may or may not indicate outside assistance is necessary.
Is the anger over the way your loved one was treated by the medical community eating you up? Or, are you angry at those who should have helped you in the last days of your loved one’s life, but were nowhere to be found? How can you reduce the intensity of your anger and then let it go? There are ...
Unavoidable suffering is a condition of existence, a part of the mystery that shrouds every life. It is usually the result of broken attachments to those we love or the loss of something cherished. It cannot be prevented because death and perpetual change are uncontrollable givens of living. On ...
“What you resist persists” is an old psychological saying that is especially applicable to anyone when mou ing the death of a loved one. In other words, trying to repress feelings, “be strong” or pretend you are doing well when you are not, will guarantee that pain will spill out in unexpected ...
Has someone you trust told you a secret about your deceased loved one that has added immeasurably to your grief? Where you going through his/her papers and found some information about the past that has stunned you? Has evidence of physical or emotional infidelity turned up upon reading old ...
Are you in a state of confusion? Have you made the decision that you will get through this loss? Are you confronting your loss and fears? If not, why not? Peace of mind is the ultimate goal of good grief so that one can begin the work of reinvesting in a life in the absence of the physical ...
Those mou ing the death of a loved one are often told to find closure, let go of the deceased loved one, and go on with their lives. For most, this admonition is tantamount to saying forget about the person. In truth, no one ever forgets the beloved and never wants to since our memories and our ...
Thoughts and beliefs—both of which are choices you make—are the underpinnings of the attitude you take toward loss. They are the major factors in how you will cope with your loss and to what extent you will experience additional and unnecessary suffering. Regrettably, many of us have been ...
Have you wondered why your grief seems to be going on longer than you thought it would? It could be that you have some unfinished business with the deceased, or you have some anger you have buried and don’t want to deal with. However, one of the most common causes for prolonged grief is the ...
Grief is an integral part of life and living. Everyone grieves, although not everyone mou s. That is, not everyone goes public with their grief. They have been taught to keep it to themselves because it is much too personal. Consequently, silent or suppressed grief tends to perpetuate many ...
Grief is a natural response to the loss of something valued. Myths are falsehoods parading as gospel truths. Combined they lead to much excessive emotional and physical pain when mou ing. If you mou according to myth it means you have adopted false beliefs about grief and how to cope with ...
Much of our behavior in adult life is based on the examples we were exposed to as children. Many of these examples were backed up with admonitions, directions and information that were put forth as “truth,” the way it really is. This information becomes emblazoned on the walls of our ...
In working with many bereaved people I have found the basic foundation for coping well with the vast array of losses we all have to suffer through, lies within. Yes, we all need each other or we could hardly bear the pain. But most important of all, we need our own inner strength to deal with it ...