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Browse published articles attributed to Monty Ritchings, with full-archive search.
Understanding the role of the ego in how we live our lives is essential to understanding the mystery of life. Usually when people describe themselves they are referring to the egoic self or the personality, the finite side of the whole package we call me. We speak about our likes, dislikes, what we do to fill up our days. We speak of others regarding the actions they take in their lives.
Recently, my daughter made a trip to the town where she was born. Unfortunately, it was not a happy occasion. The daughter of one of her childhood friends had committed suicide. The girl was 15 years old when she decided that she could not tolerate any more bullying. The only way she could stop the pain and humiliation was to take her own life. The day of her funeral, the daughter of another friend was found unconscious on the bathroom floor in her home. She had overdosed on some prescription drugs she had found in the medicine cabinet.
In our drive for the good life, it seems that we have become obsessed with the need to be “perfect”! Why can’t we just let our selves be who we are at the moment? As human beings we are constantly changing and evolving as our life changes. We cannot stop this process no matter how hard we try. We do not need to be obsessive about it! We raise our children to always want to be the best of the best. If they do not reach for the top and become superstars, we treat them like they are losers.
As a writer of personal development or self actualization articles, I find that I am often confronted with the remark: “If you know all this stuff, how come you aren’t perfect?” Believe me; I make all kinds of mistakes in my life. I am about as far from perfect as anyone else. I have my fears, foibles, quirks, etc just like everyone else.
I recently rejoined the Pacific Tai Chi Society. I realized after much prompting from my body (and my mind!) that I needed to get more physical exercise as part of my stress release and relaxation program. When I was an active member several years ago, I had just come out of a messy relationship so my mind was fraught with noisy self accusations and useless innuendos. I had not learned how to manage my mind very well back then, not that I am perfect at it now, so the noise was alost unbearable.
A million years ago or so when I was in college studying social work, I learned a really important lesson. It was that the minds of people are supposed to progress and become more enlightened as we evolve on our personal journey. I learned at this time that there are four questions that are supposed to be asked and eventually answered. They are: • What am I? • What am I really? • Who am I? • Who am I really?r
I think it is safe to say that there is not one person on this planet that would choose to be born into an abusive situation, whether it is any of physical, mental, emotional, spiritual or sexual abuse. As human beings, we are programmed to not like pain or suffering, however, at the hands of people who do not understand how their actions affect the lives of others, we have suffered.r
Who's in charge? You or your beliefs? This is a question that has intrigued me and many other self development buffs for many years. If you listen to most people explaining their life situations, one must take the stance that it is the beliefs that are in charge. I have to do this or I can't do that...
When I was a younger person, anger and anxiety were my "best friends". I never went anywhere without them. I did not like how they felt but I also did not like the feeling of being without them because they had become so familiar. It was almost like a void if they weren't present. My nervous sytem is very sensitive, so it was constantly in a state of overdrive. I lost my temper easily and could not function very well in a situation that required focus.
Anywhere you go these days; it is common to see people with music players like iphones blasting music into their ears. In fact, it seems like those of us who choose to listen to the world going on around us are becoming an anomaly. A report in The Hindu reports that teenage deafness is rising at alarming rates. For the full report please copy and paste this link into your URL bar when you have finished reading my blog. http://www.thehindu.com/health/policy-and-issues/article579504.ecernr
Why does it seem that most of us fear letting ourselves become quiet? In truth, I must be included in this unfortunate generalization. Virtually every person I have spoken to has readily stated that being quiet is either a daunting challenge or something they have no concept of. How many times, as a child, were we chided for “doing nothing”? Sitting around dreaming seemed to be something that really irked our parents. Even the Bible says something about “idle hands are the devils workshop”.r
Don’t some thoughts really bug you? They show up when you least need them and often won’t go away without some sort of force. So let’s look at these thoughts wandering around in our heads. Where do they come from?
What value is there in keeping your past alive, especially when it wasn’t so great the first time around? This may seem a ridiculous question but it is very true. When we allow ourselves to run in victim mode, we are keeping our past alive and prevent a future of happiness and fulfillment. How do we run in victim mode?
Have you ever wondered what would happen if war was declared and no one showed up? There is much discussion around the world about creating lasting peace… and yet there is more fighting going on globally than any other time in our history. Why? I believe that it is because of our belief that we have to fight to have peace! Fighting for Peace! Sounds like an oxymoron in my books! The questio I put forth is this: Why do we need to fight for something we already have?r
Living in the Lower Mainland of British Columbia Canada we are given the opportunity to experience many, many different cultures than our own. Life has changed dramatically since the days of my childhood back in the 1960s when 99% of the people in my life were Western European Caucasians who spoke English, although possibly with a bit of some European accent.r
How many times have you been in a public place that you have witnessed a child screaming its head off for no apparent reason? How many of those times that you witnessed the child screaming did you also witness the parent or caregiver screaming as well? I think it is sad to realize that this situation happens far too often and that it is (in most situations) completely preventable. The two questions that come to mind for me in regard to this situation are: • Why is the child really screaming? • Why is the parent really screaming?r
The other day I was relaxing at the local pool when I witnessed a really special event that unfolded in front of me. A young man was sitting in the hot tub with his 5 year old son. It was obvious they had a really special relationship as they chatted in the warm water. While they chatted, the son said that he wanted to go down the water slide. A young lady who was a life guard overheard the conversation and told the boy that the slide would be open in about ten minutes. The boy appreciated what the life guard said but had a very puzzled look on his face.
Managing stress by many of the more conventional methods promoted by counseling and psychotherapy professionals are amongst some of the most unsuccessful treatment processes available. Why? In contemporary counseling, attempts to heal the problem are targeted at the person changing the results of their choices or by reducing the effect of the choices on the body and mind.
Managing stress by many of the more conventional methods promoted by counseling and psychotherapy professionals are amongst some of the most unsuccessful treatment processes available. Why? In contemporary counseling, attempts to heal the problem are targeted at the person changing the results of their choices or by reducing the effect of the choices on the body and mind.