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Articles by Peggy Ferguson

Browse published articles attributed to Peggy Ferguson, with full-archive search.

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Showing 51–84

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Don't Let Myths Keep You From Getting Sober

I keep hearing the same old myths over and over again. And I can't help but think that others hearing these myths either believe them and give up or use them for excuses to avoid taking action on getting clean and sober. One of the myths that I hear daily is that you can't get sober for someone else, that you have to want it for yourself, or your recovery efforts won't work. This statement is both true and false. The idea that you can't get sober for someone else is completely wrong. People do it every day.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,957 views3/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Help My Teen: Could Your Child's Problems Be Due to Addiction?

Parents often find themselves in a quandary trying to figure out how to help the adolescent whose behavior, disposition, and mood has changed for the worst. The exact nature of the problem may be eluding them. They use a trial and error problem solving method where they end up trying anything and everything to solve the problem. They try assertive discipline, enrolling their child in extracurricular activities to improve self-confidence or self-esteem, tutors, antidepressants, etc. without really knowing what they are dealing with. They are often operating under faulty suppositions.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,829 views2/5 (3)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Getting Married: Building Healthy Step-families

If your family is a "remarried family" or a "step-family" then you're in good company. The experience of building a remarried or stepfamily is a common experience, not only for recovering people, but for the general population as well. There are lots of difficulties involved in putting together a stepfamily. One of the major difficulties is in the perception that a step-family is something less than desirable. Stepfamilies can be healthy.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,922 views1.5/5 (4)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery: How to Let Go and Regain Your Peace of Mind

What are you afraid of? Fear and anxiety are part and parcel of daily life with familial addiction. Fear is a paintbrush that colors almost all aspects of family life. Some fears are easily recognizable in an addicted family: "What if he gets arrested?" "When am I going to get the call in the ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,696 views3/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Addiction and Recovery: Cross Addiction and Relapse: 5 Cross Addiction Relapse Prevent Tips

Although definitions of "Addiction" seem to be continuing to evolve, addiction is still "a primary, chronic, progressive, and relapsing disease". The last decade of research has led to a refined definition of addiction as a "brain disease which is manifested by compulsive behavior". Cross addiction means that an addict can be addicted to any mood altering drug which s/he ingests. Cross addiction can be an example of relapse and/or a trigger to returning to one's previous drug of choice.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,894 views1/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Couple Communication: Can You Really Not Communicate?

I often hear couples complain that they cannot talk about anything. Does that really happen? Think about what would happen in your relationship if you really, literally could not talk to your spouse--about anything. How would you exchange information about work, daily routines, groceries and other products needed, bills to be paid, etc., if you literally could not communicate. Living in a house with another person takes a certain amount of cooperation and teamwork.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,685 views1/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Addiction and Recovery - What is Detox?

"Detox" is the beginning of the process of recovery. Most people need some kind of help getting through detox. Some people need medical help or additional structure and support. The kinds of difficulties that an alcoholic or addict will have with detox depend on a number of variables, including, personal characteristics, the specific types of drug(s), combination of drugs, length of use, amount of use, and last use. Detox is the process where your body rids itself of the mood altering chemicals that you have been ingesting. When you use drugs over time, they build up in your system.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,521 views3/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Family Dynamics of Addiction: Anger in Early Recovery

“Angry”, “mad”, “irritable”, “frustrated”, “annoyed”, “irate”, “seething”, “agitated”, and “cranky” are all labels for anger. This list, although it could be a lot longer, reflects varying degrees in intensity of anger. Anger, although a normal emotion, can be problematic for recovering alcoholics and addicts who not feel fully competent in dealing with their anger. Many recovering alcoholics and addicts have an unrealistic expectation that when they get clean and sober, that they will not have to experience uncomfortable feelings, especially anger.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

8,250 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Family Dynamics of Addiction and Recovery - How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Serious about Recovery?

Most spouses of alcoholics or addicts have been down this road before. Something has happened. Some crisis has gotten the attention of the alcoholic/addict and now he is motivated to get clean and sober. This time he is going to AA/NA and going to counseling. Promises made by the addict to stop the addictive behavior have gone unfulfilled in the past. Yet most of the time, when an addict is making those promises, he intends to keep them. This time is different. They mean it when they say it. That does not mean that what was stated as fact, is indeed, fact.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,407 views3/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Treatment for Spouses and Other Family Members of Alcoholics and Addicts

One of the most frequent questions that I hear from family members is, “Why do I need to be in counseling, when she is the alcoholic/addict? The family members that do come into treatment willingly and eagerly at the beginning are most often motivated to “help” the addict. The idea that spouses and other kin need help for their own issues often feels like an insult initially. Non-addicted loved ones need their own help because they are negatively affected by the disease in several ways. Addiction runs through generations in families.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,231 views1/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Breaking the Stalemate: Using Cognitive Therapy to Change Your Marriage

Couples often come to counseling in a last ditch effort to avoid divorce and save the marriage. They have many goals and objectives in mind, often involving helping the therapist fix the other spouse. The real underlying goal is often the desire to restore the positive feelings toward the spouse and to feel loved by the spouse. Invested in their own solutions, these same partners often go about trying to accomplish this goal by pointing out what their spouse is doing "wrong", how they "always" engage in undesirable behavior and "never" do the things that are requested.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

6,735 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Addiction and Recovery: How to Catapult Your Recovery to the Next Level by Using A Problems Checklist to Drive Skill Developmen

Early recovery is a time of self-assessment and problem identification. You have to know what is not working in order to begin to fix it. One of the first tasks, right after learning basic craving management techniques is spending the time and energy to identify the roles that chemicals have played in the life of a newly recovering alcoholic/addict. This is especially important since the chemical has occupied so many crucial roles or functions and that removing it from a person's life leaves big, gaping holes in their behavioral repertoire.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,655 views1/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Family Dynamics of Addiction: Family Systems Can Work for or Against Your Recovery

Alcoholics/addicts do not normally live in a circle made up exclusively of alcoholics and addicts. Most people suffering from addictions have a multitude of people in their lives who are affected by the addiction. Even alcoholics and addicts that are estranged from their significant others, ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

5,534 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Couple Communication: Overcoming Roadblocks to Communication to Maintain or Regain Your Marital Happiness

Most people want to have a loving, committed, happy marriage. And they think they know what will make for that happy marriage. Some of the characteristics often identified as making up a stable and loving relationship include: trust, love, respect, honesty, and faithfulness, among other attributes. Many people have the oversimplified desire to “just be happy” in their marriage, like happiness in a relationship is some simple, ordinary thing that each person is “naturally” entitled to.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,947 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

How Do You Know if Infidelity is a Symptom of Sexual Addiction: 10 Indicators

You have just discovered or been informed of your partner's infidelity. You are in shock. You are confused, angry, immobilized, depressed, and thinking you will absolutely go crazy. In the midst of all this, you keep hearing about "sexual addiction" in the media and you wonder if it is sexual ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,924 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Commumication In Recovery: Guidelines for Setting the Stage for Effective Talks with Your Loved Ones

When you want to solve some important relationship or logistics issue, you help assist help ensure your effectiveness by appropriately setting the stage for communication. Remember these guidelines while trying to solve a problem in your relationship. 1. Think about what you want to say ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,025 views2/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Marital Counseling: How to Make The Most of the Opportunities of Marriage Counseling

People seek marriage counseling because they need help or are in pain. In any given couple, there is usually one who is more interested in counseling than the other. With a list of complaints, each partner usually feels compelled to make his/her case to the counselor about their spouse being "the problem". Although initially both partners seem to have the agenda of having the counselor straighten out the other, the benefits of marital counseling can quickly guide the cooperative efforts of the partners for the benefit of the relationship.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,476 views1/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

What To Do Right Now To Keep Your Spouse From Leaving You and To Build A Better Life Together.

What if you were called into your boss's office and told that s/he was thinking about letting you go, that you were not fulfilling your job responsibilities, and that you were holding the company back rather than helping the company grow and prosper? Yes, you might be shocked or stunned. You might also already realize that you have not been working any where near your potential, that you have been somewhat disengaged from the company and just "putting in time" until retirement.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,364 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Help for the Sex Addict's Spouse - Part 5

Can the spouse of a sex addict find help individually for the effects of the sexual addiction on their lives? Sure. Much of the time, however, it is the crisis of discovery of the acting out, or some other related crisis that brings the sex addict and spouse into treatment. They usually seek ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,359 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Sexual Addiction: Defining Recovery From Sexual Addiction

Recovery from sexual addiction is slightly different than recovery from alcohol and other (AOD) addiction. With chemical dependency recovery, the goal is to abstain from all mood altering drugs. The primary goal from sexual addiction is not abstinence from sex, but the development of the ability ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

3,309 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Getting Started: "Ready, Set, Talk!"

Sometimes couples wish they felt more emotionally close to their spouses. You may feel taken for granted and might even recognize that you take your spouse for granted. One or both of you might be daydreaming about dedicating some time and energy to restoring that eroding emotional connection. You are probably both aware that marriage, like anything else we value, requires nurturing and sustained effort to maintain it. One spouse might even mention that he or she wants to set aside some time to spend together—just the two of you.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,174 views1/5 (1)

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Your Spouse's Infidelity Revealed: Getting Over The Shock and Getting To Recovery: Part 2

Marital infidelity can be revealed in a whole host of different ways. Regardless of how the infidelity is revealed, the revelation of the infidelity creates a crisis within the marital relationship and within the faithful spouse. The shock of discovering the infidelity leads to compulsive ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,797 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Our Marriage Is In Trouble But My Spouse Won't Go to Marriage Counseling: 7 Reasons Why Your Spouse May Resist Counseling

The idea of marriage counseling is usually brought up and pursued by one partner, initially. The possibility of marriage counseling is often an ongoing debate or discussion for sometime before couples actually find their way to the counselor's office.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,742 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Falling Out of Love - Should We Pack It In?

Often when a couple comes in for couple’s counseling, one of the partners is stating that s/he has fallen out of love with the other partner. Sometimes they both feel that way, but usually it is just one spouse verbalizing this. When you are feeling this way, it is common to question whether you ever “really” loved your spouse in the first place. Usually when couples present for counseling with one wanting out of the relationship, there other marital issues that are creating problems in the marriage, that the couple may not be talking about or acknowledging.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,496 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Your Spouse's Infidelity Revealed: Of Course You Are Angry and Scared: Part 1

Infidelity can be a component of sexual addiction or relational event(s). It is generally enshrouded in secrecy and dishonesty, with great amounts of time and effort spent to keep it hidden. Spouses find out about the infidelity or sexual addiction in a wide variety of ways. Several are ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,466 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

A Realistic Approach to Reducing Unhappiness and Preventing Divorce

While many conflicted and combative couples stay together through the holidays to not disappoint the kids or the extended family members, other couples who may have not even been thinking about divorce, begin to feel discouraged, disappointed, and disenchanted after the holidays and decide to divorce. Although there are very good reasons for divorce, personal unhappiness may not be caused by the marriage, and divorce may not be the solution. It is unlikely that your marriage is the source of all of your unhappiness.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,426 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

The Naked Truth About Sexual Addiction

There is nothing sexy about sex addiction. Compulsive sexual behavior is not a pastime or hobby. Sexually addicted people use all kinds of excuses and defense mechanisms to deny the truth to themselves. The naked truth about addiction is that once it is addiction, the addict is spiritually and ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,240 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Are You Suffering from Someone Else's Sexual Addiction? - Part 4

Are you angry, depressed, confused, and constantly trying to figure out what your spouse is up to? If you are spinning your wheels, trying to strategize and find solutions for your spouse and your relationship before you have actually identified the problem, keep reading. Family members can suffer from the sexual addiction of spouses, and spend countless hours trying to solve the problem before they really know what they are dealing with. If you are suffering negative consequences of someone else's sexual behavior, you might be in a relationship with a sex addict.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,084 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Everyone Loses When You Give Up on Your Marriage Without Trying to Acquire the Skills You Need To Keep It

There is the "should" that says that you should be able to solve your own problems without help. Here is the rationale: "If your relationship has enough tension and strain that help is needed, the relationship is not going to make it anyway, so why waste time and money with counseling?" The reality is that if you give up on your marriage without first trying to acquire the skills that your need to be happy in it, you lose. Everyone loses.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

2,068 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Keep Your Parents and Children Out of Your Marriage

Keep your parents and your children out of your marriage. Once they are in there, it's hard to get them out. When you are in conflict with your spouse, it is really tempting to use whoever is handy to vent to, regarding your marriage. And often the people available most available to us are our children and parents. They are typically most often in our presence, and if we don't see them throughout the day, they are often the people we speak to on the phone most often.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,854 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Using Valentine's Day to Build Your Own Marriage Enrichment Initiative

Routine. Boring. Settled in. Comfortable. You love your spouse. You believe that she and the family are the most important people in your life. You have settled into a comfortable routine, accepting that you are loved and appreciated by your family. Your comfortable routine consists of an ongoing cycle of work, dinner, tv, bed. When you talk to this most important person in your life, your wife, you talk about replacing the roof, what the kids did that day, what you need from the store, or maybe something that happened at work that day. The conversation lasts maybe ten minutes.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,779 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

How to Find The Best Marriage Counselor For Your Needs

Everyone wants "the best". When you are looking for a marriage counselor it is important to find someone who is specifically trained in marriage counseling and has the credential of "licensed" or "certified" marriage counselor". This indicates that they demonstrated some level of competence necessary to have had to passed some test(s) or other criteria of competence.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,521 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

Help For the Sex Addict - Part 3

Treatment for sexual addiction can occur in an inpatient or outpatient setting. Like treatment for alcohol and other drug (AOD) addiction, treatment for sexual addiction is usually made up of individual and group counseling, education about addiction, and self-help participation. When choosing ...

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,378 views

By Peggy FergusonRecently published1 topic

The Key To Successful Recovery of Your Marriage Is Within You

The key to successfully recovering the love that has eroded is within you. The fun that you once shared together can happen again. The robust sense of "us" that colored the choices you made on a daily basis can be restored. The ability to accomplish these things is within each partner. The key to restoring marital happiness is not dependent upon what your partner is doing. It is not about how much money you have (or how much debt). It is not about how the household chores are divided (equally or not). It is not even about how much time you spend together.

Primary topic: Drug and Substance Abuse

Drug and Substance Abuse

1,361 views

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