Dr. Romance on Asking for What you Want
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Primary topic: Relationship Advice
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Browse published articles attributed to Tina Tessina, with full-archive search.
A practical article connected into the broader SelfGrowth topic graph.
Introverts can enjoy the parties, too, if they respect who they are and don’t let negative fantasies take over. Limit your social engagements to those that are manageable or meaningful to you, and allow plenty of time for being by yourself or with a single friend, if that's what makes you happy. If you're not happy about missing out on all the parties, here are some strategies to help.
Dear Dr. Romance:
When I met Richard, my husband, October 10, 1981, he was sitting outside, and the sun was glinting off his red hair, and my whole body and soul said {wow!” Twenty-three years later, we’re still happy. It turned out to be a lasting love at first sight. How did I know?
Dear Dr. Romance: My husband complains that life is a habitrail that he has to get on everyday and he is not being reloaded. I have tried everything I know how to make things better for him. I don't know how to reply anymore, and honestly I am not sure there is anything I can do.
Dr. Romance writes: OK, so you're disappointed. Your dream has ended in the trash. So, after you get finished with laying on the floor, kicking your heels, and screaming; or going on a drunken binge, or beating someone up, you find you're still disappointed, and all that acting out hasn't fixed anything. Now what do you do? Disappointment is a dead-end in your road. Now you need to figure out a new direction. Here are some hints:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Grief is an essential life skill -- knowing how to survive grief means feeling safe to take another risk, and grieving actually expands one's capacity to love.Expression of grief, and respect for the dead, is very important to the grieving process. A symbol of grief for the loss of one person reminds us all of our grief for anyone we lost, and can be overwhelming.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance,
Dear Dr. Romance: This is something that's puzzling me for along time. I often do want the playgirl, but they like the more bad boy type. I know for sure I want sex without strings attached, many men get this, but I simply attract women who want a boyfriend, and I don't want this! It seems as if society is saying, cause I'm a nice guy, I must be trapped into a commitment to get what I want which is sex.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance is delighted to be interviewed on Careers In Psychology Dr. Tina Tessina
DO. NOT. REACT. Tips for surviving & mastering confrontation, with grace —in business & in love. Pop quiz, people: How do you drop an atom bomb of sudden, unexpected (and quite possibly, undesirable) information on someone you care about — without behaving like a cruel, dispassionate ogre? AND! If you’re the unfortunate recipient of the aforementioned atom bomb, how do you respond with compassion — instead of setting off a furious chain reaction?
Dr. Romance writes: Many people who come to me for therapy have trouble with anger. It may be trouble in expressing anger effectively, losing control with their anger, or becoming the victim of someone else's abuse. Understanding how anger works and what it really is can help you manage your own anger more effectively and deal better with other peoples'. Anger is the emotional energy within each of us that rises up when something needs to change.
Dear Dr. Romance: This is a diificult one for you, my daughter's stepdaughter was molested by my father about two years ago, because of it we had financial issues, had to leave our home and buy another and go through a long court proceeding, which ended several months ago. A month later, my wife had bad depression but has recovered (she has had theses issues since very young).
No matter how angry or hurt you may be after a divorce, if you have children, you’ll still share a lifetime with their other parent, your ex. Dr. Romance offers guidelines for moving past the anger and hurt, and finding a way to co-parent your children that is good for everyone.
Dear Dr. Romance: I have been married to my wife for 19 years and I have ask her to tell me her fantasies for along time, she says she has none, Is this possible? She always wants oral sex buts never gives any back, Do you have anything I could try to open her up to new things? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: Is it possible to love someone without ever dating them? If so, how can you tell that you are in love? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm terrified to recommit Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I dated a woman for about a year who was divorced with a small child. For most of our time together, I believed that I had found the best person ever. She was very honest, open minded, considerate, respectful, loving, and kind. Our relationship was excellent. She said she loved everything about me. I can not stress how intimate and loving our relationship was.
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A practical article connected into the broader SelfGrowth topic graph.
Dr. Romance writes: There is always something in the news or on TV to scare us. Hysterical articles in the media sell papers, and attract eyeballs to websites, but are usually exaggerating the facts. If you listen without evaluating what you’re being told, it’s easy to become frightened. There's a reason why I don't usually waste time and energy on panic and drama.
Dr. Romance writes: The average person pays more attention to what she's saying or thinking about than what she is hearing, or how her words are "landing" on the other person. This self-involvement gets worse during an argument. You can become a much more effective communicator by using what I call the attentive speaking technique, a simple and highly effective way to improve your communication with your partner, your children, or extended family, or co-workers.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes:
Dear Dr. Romance: I have a problem with this girl I like who's four years younger, we've been friends for a year. She recently broke up with her boyfriend. One week after they broke up, I went out with her. We had some drinks, and started making out. I asked her how long she had wanted to make out with me and she said a while as our friendship was quite flirty. Then we ended up having sex, but it wasn't great because it was in the back of a car.
Dear Dr. Romance: I had two divorces, and both men turned out to be gay. By this time my self esteem was shattered, I felt there was something wrong with me. To make a long story short, I basically started dating and slept with men, just because they showed they desired me. (Wrong thing to do).
Dr. Romance writes: Many people ask me, “How will I know if I'm in love?”
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I've seen your website and I think you may be the exact person to be able to help me. My wife and I have been married for just about 10 yrs., we have 3 beautiful children, and we live fairly comfortably (money is not too big of an issue). I grew up in a fairly affluent family, with good strong ethics -my wife calls us the 'Beaver Cleaver Family' .
Dear Dr. Romance,
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm trying to find out why I always have sex on the first date. This is not to say that I have sex with every girl I date, or even that every girl I've gone out with has even been interested in me. It is simply to say that the overwhelming majority of my "situations" have been one date situations, for whatever reason and on the occasions that the woman is interested in me, we usually end up having sex.
Dr. Romance writes: The revered Sufi poet, Rumi, wrote: “We turn poison into medicine and our sorrows into blessings” I’m thankful for many things. I live a wonderful life, surrounded by loving friends and my beloved husband, Richard; I have the privilege of doing work which I love, and I’m thankful (yes, really) for being diagnosed with diabetes 11 years ago.
For Adult Children of Divorce, 3 Tips for a Better Marriage than your Parents Had If you're an adult child of divorce in a marriage that's been struggling, you can learn good marriage-building skills to keep your relationship from going the divorce route. Here are three tips to help: 1. View your parents as examples of what not to do.
Dr. Romance's Top 5 ways to take your marriage from good to great.