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Browse published articles attributed to Warren Redman, with full-archive search.
It is well known by now that work-related stress is a major contributor to loss of productivity. What isn’t so well understood is how leaders within the organization can make simple changes to decrease stress and bring quantifiably better bottom-line results. Even where stress doesn’t appear to ...
The strangest stories are usually the true life ones. Take Marnie (not her real name), who recollected as a child ingrade 3 how she would roll a large piece of art paper around herself and stand in a corner. Her teacher would try to get her to come out; the other children would make fun of ...
Mostly, we have no idea of the effect we have on other people’s lives. How a kind or an unkind word to a stranger can improve or damage their day; how an angry glance can upset a child, or a nod of encouragement help that same child to strive for something great. Mostly, we are conce ed only ...
For many years we have been, quite rightly, acknowledging moms and the balancing act that they have to maintain to do all the things that good moms do. More recently attention has started to focus on the vital role of dads in the healthy and positive upbringing of their children. At last, one ...
Have you ever tried catching an autumn leaf as it falls from the tree? It’s something I like to do each year. Imagine – a 65 year old man, a serious author, psychotherapist and coach, running around like a five-year-old trying to catch one elusive, capricious leaf as it sails unpredictably ...
My guess is that our souls are transforming all the time, even though, like our bodies, they still remain identifiably us. There are occasions when we may consciously recognize a shift in our very being, that is to say, in the soul. Those occasions are usually traumatic or highly significant ...
Here’s one of the quotes that I didn’t think up – it’s an old one that I recall from my childhood and one that has become more pertinent the more I hear people talk without the evidence of any action. One of the key elements that constitute the 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness is that each one of ...
Quote from The 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness also by Warren Redman One of the processes we use in Emotional Fitness is called the Lifescale. It consists of ten questions, which together helps us make sense of the balance we have between our satisfactions and frustrations in life. Each question ...
I remember my grandmother saying to me, in her jovial and gentle way, that talking to yourself is the first sign of madness. She’d say that when she caught herself chatting to herself as she mixed yet another floury concoction into a bowl with her oversized wooden spoon. At seven, while I knew ...
Any expression of emotion is good for the soul if we allow it. Withholding our laughter can be as damaging as suppressing our tears. There was a time in my life when I held back both. At a level just below my consciousness I knew that they were there. It felt as though I was punishing myself and ...
There are experts all around us. Professionals who can, and will, tell us how to handle our finances, our health, our children, our garden, our golf – even our sex lives and our funeral arrangements. Psychologists and job interviewers will hand us personality assessment tests and tell us where ...
Now that summer – in the Northern hemisphere anyway – is truly here, it’s harder to stick to writing at my computer. With a new book in the works I content myself with gazing wistfully out of the window and, when the urge takes me, simply stop mid-sentence and wander out into the garden for ...
Little causes more heated debate and potentially hurt feelings than the topic of religion between people of differing opinions and faiths. While religious values and tradition have been of great comfort to millions of people, it has also caused enmity between neighbours, civil strife and even ...
Quote from The 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness also by Warren Redman Last week I was in the UK spending time with family members – something that doesn’t happen often for me these days. It was the occasion of my father’s 90th birthday. He was surrounded by his children and most of his ...
Ever felt that life dealt you so much that it was too complicated to handle? There’s the new project at work that you just got handed to add to the myriad of others things that you have to handle. Your spouse wants you to help plan that vacation you’ve been putting off talking about. The kids ...
Money isn’t everything, as the saying goes, but it sure helps. Sadly, the amount of energy put into attaining money does make it look as though it is everything to most people. The very fact that wealthy people always seem to seek more money reinforces that image. I have worked with some ...
It took nearly fifty years, but I can honestly say at last that I learned something really important from my time at WHS. Accepting the invitation to attend the reunion of the 1951 intake was itself a major decision. It entailed travelling from Calgary in Western Canada to take part in an ...
Quote from The 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness a book also by Warren Redmannn“I thought you said you’d done that.” “No, I said I’d need more time and some training before I could complete it.” “Well, I assumed you were getting the training.” ...
When I first met Tom, more than ten years ago, he was a single man of 32, who sold vending machines for a living. He was successful at this, one of the best salesmen in the company, despite being unable to write because of his dyslexia. But he felt himself to be a failure, and that he had not ...
Pain, whether it’s physical or emotional, is an inevitable and vital part of life. It is clearer that physical pain is an important signal to us that part of our body is under attack, whether from an exte al source (“ouch, I just scraped my knee”) or an inte al one (“my stomach really aches”). ...
It is perhaps one of the greatest challenges. How do we find it within ourselves to love our enemies? Why would we even want to? These days, I can think of nobody I know who I can see as my enemy. That wasn’t always true. Many years ago I had a boss who was in complete control of his emotions. ...
A few months ago I traveled from Canada to a school reunion in England. As events go, maybe this does not rank as amazing. But amazing it was and taught me more about how we develop as adults than reading a ton of books on the subject. Here was a group of fifty or more men and women, most of ...
Our Emotional Fitness has a significant bearing on the rest of our health. If you have any doubts about that, simply look at how you are affected when you become anxious, or overly angry, or very joyous, or feel a lot of stress. Do you experience mental or physical reactions to those emotional ...
If you enjoy reading fiction, I invite you to read an as yet unpublished novel of mine. It’s called “State of Flux” and is about four people searching for meaning in their lives. It involves romance, spiritual growth, intrigue and mystery. I will send you an electronic copy if you let me know ...
Quote from The 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness also by Warren Redman Taking things for granted is the way most of us live our lives; right up until we see or experience something that brings us up sharply. Flicking on a light switch or turning on the tap for a kettle of water may be an automatic ...
Quote from The 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness a book by Warren Redman This is, perhaps, another way of saying “wherever you go, there you are”. Since you were born, you have been in your own place, and always a place of your own making. Like it or not, it’s yours; and here’s the point, you can ...
As long as both are willing, of course, one kiss, one hug, one look into the eyes, one smile, brings happiness to at least the two people involved. I wonder, then, why so many people shy away from those small intimacies that can help to bring joy to the giver as much as the receiver. What ...
Quote from The 9 Steps to Emotional Fitness by Warren Redman There comes time when we will each be confronted by a life-changing event or decision. Perhaps you have already faced one or two of those in your life. You will understand what I mean if you have. Frequently, the people who ask for ...
There never was anything wrong with you – or with any of us. Unfortunately, too many of us received messages as children that there was something wrong, or at least not good enough about us. Enough of those messages, even if they come from well-meaning parents and teachers, and we get to believe ...
Storytelling is a uniquely human trait. It’s how we learn about our world and ourselves, and how we pass on to others the lessons of what we have discovered. In Recipes for Inner Peace, Jenny’s coach Nicolas asks her to write two stories. The first is the story of an object that Nicolas brings ...
Time and again when I am coaching someone, or during one of our Emotional Fitness training sessions, I hear the same pattern coming up; the same theme song of that particular individual. And, as the coaching or training continues, that person will say “enough; I have had enough of doing the same ...
It’s not a race. We are, but it isn’t. Oddly we do often appear to act as though we are not from the same species and that, indeed, the race is on to be better than the other guy or to have more and show more success in whatever way we deem it. The fact is that there are comparatively few ...
If you’ve ever wondered how you could change the way people behave in a group from being either passive or aggressive into one where they actually listen positively to each other, here’s a recipe for you. Whether the group you are thinking about is a family or an executive board, or ...
Some months ago I listened to a woman (let’s call her Kate) calling me long-distance. “I should have taken that opportunity when it came up,” she told me. “Now I feel it’s passed me by.” A few minutes later she wondered out loud if she should leave her current comfortable but far from ...
Sometimes, like today, it seems that there is not enough time to do the things I want to do, or rather, that I have set myself to do. That, of course, is an illusion. There is always time. There is always all the time in the world. We humans, after all, invented time, or at least subdivided the ...
Occasionally, very occasionally, it may be prudent to take precautions and put up some kind of defensive wall against potential marauders. But our society and communities today appear to have moved to extremes in reaction to the fear that is sweeping into many corners of our lives. Do the ...
My wife taught me this. One evening a couple of years ago, as I was leaving to give a presentation to an audience of professionals, I said to her that I hoped I would do a good job. “Just be yourself,” she told me. The affect on me was amazing, and it resulted in the best presentation I had ...
Problems seldom feel good when you are in the midst of them. Most inspirational speakers and books, and many bosses, encourage us to see problems as opportunities, which is fine if at that moment you don’t feel weighed down by them. The interesting thing is that looking back at what seemed ...
We all have a creative spark. Some of us allow that spark to light a flame that burns brightly. Others let it fizzle and splutter. A few weeks ago Nicole and I stood gazing up at the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, that marvel of artistic endeavour created by Michelangelo, wondering at the ...
To many people this is the Knowledge Age and knowledge workers have been in high demand in industries of all kinds for almost a generation. All the signs are pointing to a change. If you haven’t noticed it, this is because it has crept upon us and has hardly entered the consciousness yet. ...
We don’t always feel like smiling. Sometimes I find myself walking from my house a few blocks, my head full of thoughts about what I have been doing or am about to do, when I pass by somebody who smiles and nods a greeting. Almost instantly, my life in that moment is transformed. I start ...
Our third Recipe for Inner Peace is a unique set of ten questions. The Lifescale will help you to understand the balance you have now in your life between your positive and negative emotional energies – those things that cause satisfaction and frustration. Since I developed and began using the ...
There is nothing wrong with that little word “but”, but I take care how I use it, since an over or inappropriate use gives the message that I negate myself. Emotional Fitness includes the ability to consciously choose our language and how we use words to express ourselves. Words are powerful. ...
Remember the line in “Fiddler on the Roof”? Tevya debated endlessly with himself about his daughters (on the one hand this, and on the other hand that) until he finally lost patience and declared, “There is no other hand!” For him, at that point of his frustration, there appeared to be no ...
In Emotional Fitness coaching, we often use the Time Capsule, which is one of the most empowering of all our tools. In the Time Capsule, we invite you to take a look at a current incident, behaviour or feeling that is having an impact on you through the eyes of your own inner child. The dialogue ...
This was a favourite quote of my mentor, teacher and friend John Heimler. He had some experience with pain, both physical and emotional, as a survivor of Auschwitz and other concentration camps; pain that is unimaginable to most of us. We all have our own pain to bear at different times during ...
This could, perhaps, be a message to George W. Bush. But it’s to all of us, since we are each accountable for the world around us, whether we influence a few people or a few billion; whether we oversee a small flower-pot or a huge acreage. Nobody acts with foolish intention. In fact most ...
Sure, there are some things that are conditional, and are entitled to be. Trust counts among them; entering into a business contract is another; agreeing to take on another responsibility a third. Love is not one. There can be nothing conditional about love, or it is not love. We humans have an ...
We all live inner lives. Thoughts and feelings that sometimes we are hardly aware of exist almost independently of our outward existence. Occasionally, when we become more conscious of what is going on within us, we might express the idea, the thought, the feeling. Often we will suppress it, ...
John took early retirement after 23 years in the same corporation, by then a highly respected oil executive. At 55, he had looked forward to this day for years. He had a plan. He took his wife and teenage children on a world trip for a year. The second year, he played golf every day he could. ...