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Browse published articles attributed to Willie Horton, with full-archive search.
I was sent an article on lottery sales by a reader a couple of weeks back - how, the Texas State Lottery was heading for record sales of US$3.83bn this year. Yes, that's one State and that's billion, not million! You'll also see in the article that its the poorer people who spend a disproportionate amount of their income on lottery tickets.
Here’s a question that you may have never seriously asked yourself. Are you happy with yourself and with your life? The chances are that there are things that you would like to change about both you and your life – I have rarely met anyone who is truly happy, they are few and far between. People often believe that if they improve themselves, lose weight, get fit, buy a new car, go on a great holiday, move house that, then, they will be happy. That kind of happiness, however, is fleeting and superficial. Happiness should be lasting and not dependant on having this or doing that.
Normal behaviour is rarely appropriate and often completely inappropriate if not totally bizarre. How could it be appropriate? Because normal behaviour is triggered automatically – you don’t have to think about it, you just react – by your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind is fine tuned to enable you react, using functionality known, in psychological circles, as automaticity. It is this ability that has got us so far as the apparently ‘superior’ species!
Over seventy years of psychological research proves conclusively that we live automatic lives. "Automaticity" is what psychologists call our extremely efficient ability to perform routine tasks without paying attention to them. Stop for a moment to reflect on how much attention you paid, this morning, to brushing your teeth, showering, shaving, walking or driving. Do you drive today the way you drove the first time you ever sat behind a steering wheel? We learn our routine tasks in two ways.
There is a well-worm saying that suggests that perception is, in fact, reality. And, no matter how most thinking people might laugh off such a notion, the fact is that for the normal mind, reality is just that - the sum total of our perceptions. How we perceive the world, how it works and our place in it dictates how we behave. Most importantly of all, our own self-perception creates our reality - or, at least, our version of it.
People tell me that, having met me for the first time, they are shocked to discover that they aren’t there! They are stunned to realize that their body is present but that their mind is somewhere else. And, even as you read these words, you’re only partly here. Decades of psychological research from all over the world confirms that your life is like a cracked record. Today, your mind will play be ‘entertained’ by approximately fifty thousand random thoughts. Ninety seven percent of those thoughts will be the same as yesterday’s fifty thousand.
We all want more out of life. Some of us want to change our lives radically – some of us have things about ourselves that we want to change. But, unfortunately, for most of us, life keeps getting in the way! The stress of everyday life – yes, millions of people are suffering from stress and national health services worldwide are leaking money trying to cope with the related health problems – stop us in our tracks.
If you’ve got everything that you want out of life and want for nothing at all, in any aspect of your life, do not read this article. Everyone else – read on! From my experience in dealing directly with clients for the last fourteen years, or through my online workshop, I reckon everyone else includes almost everyone. Ask yourself these simple questions: Are you 100% happy with yourself? Do you absolutely adore your job? Have you more than enough money? Are you as fit, trim and healthy as you really would love to be?
We all have some sense that we reap what we sow – or what goes around comes around – but quantum physics actually scientifically proves that karma is a powerful force in our lives. As quantum physics might put it, energy in : energy out.
Over the last year or so, I have spoken to a number of people who have found themselves at a crossroads in their careers through no fault of their own. Economic circumstances, being in the work place at the wrong time, employers using the excuse of the economic downtu to re-structure – have led to many people finding themselves out of work at a time in their lives when they could, quite reasonably, have expected to be taking their foot off the peddle and relaxing.
Worrying about money, being anxious about job security, worrying about children, fearful of personal security, feeling inadequate – these are the things that occupy the normal mind. Unfortunately, psychology has proven time and time again that the normal mind is plagued by negative thought. This negativity is formed in the subconscious – that part of the mind that was inculcated with this form of negative thinking during our formative years – and is fed by the ubiquity of bad news, negative comment and the horror stories on which the mass media thrive.
Over the last year, increasing numbers of regular readers of my weekly Ezine have pointed out that, in the current economic environment, it is very difficult to “keep your head” whilst everyone around you is losing theirs. (I should point out that they’re grateful to me for the weekly opportunity to pull themselves together!) In other words, it can be very difficult, when faced with the reality of losing your job, losing your life savings or losing your home, to believe that simply changing your mind will change your life. Surely, there’s simply too much evidence around us at the pr
First of all, we all know what the title means – children’s lives toyed with by teachers, children bullied in the schoolyard and employees bullied in the workplace. We’re all aware of domestic violence, psychological violence in the home and the workplace and the manner in which Governments play with people’s lives probably demands a whole article – or book – of its own.
I may be in danger of breaking into song here – and anyone who has heard me sing will confirm that you don’t want to be there when that happens! Seriously, thought, the well-known hit song does actually say it like it is – “Ooh heaven is a place on earth”! Confirmation of this fact comes from the most unlikely of sources – I quote the late Cardinal Cathal Daly who made the following telling point in his wonderful book, “The Minding of Planet Earth”: heaven is not a place that you will find when you die – the only place that you will find heaven is in the time-less here and now.
What impact does your self esteem have on your personal effectiveness, your relationships and the normal course of your daily life? How does low self esteem affect your view of what you can and cannot achieve? Indeed, what is low self-esteem, how does it even come about in the first place? Are you one of the many people that find themselves suffering from low self esteem? Would you like to learn how to build your self esteem and change your life completely?
The secret to dealing with difficult people is to take the necessary action before they become difficult. Like everything else in life, if you deal with something before it becomes a problem, you’ll never have any major problems to deal with. The problem is, of course, that in the ordinary course of our everyday lives, we don’t do the small things that we know we should do, we don’t today what we can put off until tomorrow and, most importantly, we tolerate behaviour that we shouldn’t.
I recently received an email from a jou alist in the US asking me what I knew about people gaining an online certification for life coaching. And a few weeks back, one of my clients mentioned to me that he'd been approached by a life coach who had "qualified" following a weekend course and some follow-up telephone tutorials. At least, I suppose, that was better than being certified online! But the one that really sticks out in my mind is the time a client told me that he'd received a pitch from a life coach who was twenty five years old.
Undoubtedly, we, as normal crazy adults, are built to worry – it appears to be an integral part of our hard-wiring. And, if we can’t find something to worry about, we’ll invent it. I once had a client, who should have known better, telephone me to tell me that he was having sleepless and that he was becoming increasingly worried. When I asked what he was actually worried about, he replied “I’m worried because I’ve nothing to worry about!
So many people struggle against things that they can do nothing about. So many people become upset or annoyed about things over which they have no control. And oh so few people take control of the one thing in life over which they can exercise absolute and total control. Like puppets, we allow our mood to be pulled up or down in tandem with the ups and downs of life. But the downs – or even just the “not-too-bads” – that we encounter are what they are. These things are sent to try us and most of us are found wanting.
Just a couple of weeks ago, I spent a day with a doze "old-timers" clients with whom I've been working for years. Early on in the discussion, as we chatted about how psychology and quantum physics proves that you get what you expect, so that, if you expect something different, something different does, indeed, happen, one of the group mentioned that he tries to ensure that, each morning, he starts the day in a positive state of mind. We started talking about how many motivational experts claim great benefits for the technique of self-affirmation. You know the kind of thing.
Over seventy years of psychological research proves conclusively that we live automatic lives. "Automaticity" is what psychologists call our extremely efficient ability to perform routine tasks without paying attention to them. Stop for a moment to reflect on how much attention you paid, this morning, to brushing your teeth, showering, shaving, walking or driving. Do you drive today the way you drove the first time you ever sat behind a steering wheel? We learn our routine tasks in two ways.
I recently spoke to a client who told me that he was plagued by what I would describe as useless thought – feelings of inadequacy, distractions, negative thoughts, worries, even fears. The first thing that I said to him was that, at the very least, he could count himself among the horribly small percentage of people who are actually aware that they are, in fact, having useless thoughts.
Today is a new day – one that has never happened before, a unique day that will never be repeated. Now is a new moment. And, in this new moment, you have a choice. You have a choice - which thoughts you are you going to pay attention to just at this moment in time? The probability is that they are random thoughts – whatever nonsense has just popped into your head. And, as psychology proves, those random thoughts are more likely to be negative than positive.
Many people are struggling at present – many have lost their jobs and many who still have jobs have taken a cut in their take home pay. Many small businesses are struggling, unable to access necessary credit from unwilling bankers – and some are going to the wall.
Do you ever wake up in the morning full of good intentions for the day ahead and find that, by the time that you get to work you’re no longer motivated? Or, maybe, you get off to a flying start but when the first minor distraction or interruption occurs, you go off the rails. Do you ever find that, despite your best efforts, the little voices in your head keep dragging you down? Do you keep finding yourself being internally asked searching questions that make you question either your own ability or the prospects for success? In other words, how easy is it for you to run out of steam?
You are the creator of your own version of reality. Decades of psychological research prove beyond doubt that how you think controls how you behave and how you behave creates your life. Your mood dictates how you feel about every situation and every person that you encounter in your life. Your mood dictates how you react to every perceived opportunity, threat, compliment or insult. And, unfortunately, at this moment in time, you are incapable of controlling your own mood because it is automatically dictated by your subconscious mind.
From talking to clients in various countries, from talking to radio talk-show hosts, from following the latest news it could be said that we live in desperate times. And, as the old saying goes, desperate times call for desperate measures. No they don’t. What people need now is a sharper and clearer understanding of the reality of the here and now, rather than continuously wallowing in the perceived desperation of today’s apparent reality. My last sentence is a deliberately loaded one. The normal person doesn’t see or experience reality. The normal person perceives their own version of real
How are you going to be up to the not-too-onerous task of getting the very best out of life if you are mentally unfit? Unfortunately, many years of research confirms that the normal mind is not just unfit for effortless living, it has been living on a diet of clapped-out old movies (from your childhood) all of your adult life. It’s the ultimate couch potato. And, if, for all of your adult life, you had sat like a lazy slob on a couch, would you really expect to be able to spring from your couch, put on your trainers and go out for even a light jog?
A clear mind is the only state of mind worth being in. It enables you appreciate what’s actually happening around you and places you in a position to act – rather than react, which is the normal response of so-called normal people. A clear and focused state of mind alerts you to the opportunities of the moment so that you can grasp them. On the other hand, a normal muddled mind won’t notice opportunities at all. And a clear mind, focused in the here and now enables your subconscious lead you towards what you want out of life.
The word ‘focus’ is often used in the context of success. We’re told, for example, that highly successful people are better focused than the rest of us. We hear stories about athletes or sports people who are totally focused. Surely, if either you or I could get some of this focus, at the very least, our lives would be the better for it. We might not end up being world-beaters – we may not even want to be world-beaters – but a little focus, a bit more success and a lot of happiness wouldn’t go astray!! So, what is focus? What does being focused mean? How can I focus my mind?
You’re one of those people who want to, to quote Oprah, live your best life. So, you’ve read the books – you know the ones, those feel-good self-help books. And you felt good while you were reading them. But your life has gone on much as it did before – with the normal stress and worry of everyday life – and, instead of feeling good, you don’t even feel bad – you feel worse! Because you’ve explored, you’ve read about it, you know that it works for others (or maybe all those self-help authors are just making it up!) and you’ve discovered that it hasn’t worked for you.
Each Monday morning, I recommend a self improvement book to my Personal Development Ezine readers. But I’ve decided to stop. I’ve come to the conclusion that self help, personal development or self improvement books – whatever you’d prefer to call them – don’t work. For starters, Forbes estimates that $11 billion was spent in 2008 (that’s the latest reliable figure that I can come up with) on self improvement books and products.
How do you achieve lasting peace of mind? Well, the answer is in both the question and the title of this article. You find it within, in your mind, where else would you expect to find it! It doesn’t matter what is going on around you, what is happening in your life or who is doing what to you. It has nothing to do with whether or not you think you’ve sufficient income or a secure job. It is entirely down to what is going on in your mind – and therein lies the problem because the normal mind is full of crap.
I’ve just received an email from a reader who tells me that, after wasting many years on “normal” living and “normal” people, she is now determined to take the necessary steps to find peace of mind, contentment, happiness and success. Her use of the word “normal” refers to many of my articles and videos which explain that, in fact, so-called normal people are crazy. Years of research, when taken together, confirm just how crazy normal people are. In essence, the normal person’s life is controlled by their subconscious mind’s preference for dwelling on the past and the negative.
There is over seventy years’ research that proves conclusively that you and I, as normal people, are crazy. Our minds control us, not the other way around as it should be – as sure a definition of madness as I have ever seen. The evidence started mounting up all the way back in 1936 when a certain Professor Stroop proved that our inability to pay attention even hinders us paying attention to what we want we have decided to pay attention to!
Unfortunately, most people look at life through dark glasses and, consequently, everything looks gloomier than it should. This is normal because the normal mind is hard-wired to look at reality by filtering it through our conditioning and, in doing so, it is more likely than not that the mind will focus on negative rather than positive conditioning. This mental frailty is what is keeping your life on hold.
As I travel around from country to country, working with and talking to my various personal development clients, I am struck by the number of people who are doing what they’re doing for the money. In asking them what they would do with their life if money were no object, few tell me that they would keep doing what they are currently doing. My anecdotal evidence seems to be backed up by the extent to which the vast majority of normal people don’t like their work.
It only takes one person to believe. That statement is littered across so many texts, over so many centuries - from spiritual literature, to the chronicles of the great explorers and inventors, to the field of professional sport.
Myself and my family recently spent an evening on our balcony star-gazing – watching the annual Perseid Meteor Shower – when the earth passes through a band of wayward comet grit. Many people might just see one shooting star in their lifetime – but, in the space of about twenty minutes, we counted a dozen. It was a humbling experience. Here we were, five insignificant dots on the balcony of a house – no more than a dot on this planet which, in itself is no more than a tiny pebble spinning at high speed through a vast space.
Real life is full of possibilities and opportunities that the normal mind is unaware of. That’s because the normal mind is rarely present – our subconscious mind expends most of our energy focusing on its internal ‘stored knowledge’. Taking the psychological-speak out of the last sentence, we are normally living in the past – and we’re completely unaware of it. In fact, generally speaking, we’re unaware, full stop!r
Once our day gets going it is the easiest thing in the world to get swept away by the routine, the urgent (which, by the way, is quite different from the important), the latest minor crisis (which probably seems major at the time) or, most common of all, the endless stream of useless thought that simply distracts us. Even if you have made the effort and started your day properly, it is simply all too easy to become submerged in the cares and worries of the moment and, as a result, revert to our default state of unfocused mindlessness.
A great deal has been said and written about the so-called Law of Attraction’. It has been popularised by videos and books, like ‘The Secret’ and by televisions talk-show hosts such as Larry King. It’s been around for decades – Florence Schovel Shinn’s book ‘The Game of Life and How to Play It’ is a user’s manual for the Law of Attraction – it’s just that she didn’t call it by that fancy name!
Our lives are the product of what we ourselves do to create them. Although, ultimately, we cannot fully control our lives, we can, in the right frame of mind, exert a huge influence on our success and happiness. Unfortunately, however, the normal person exerts little or no influence at all over the course of their lives because they have no concept of their own ability to grasp full control of the one and only thing that all us can control – our own state of mind. Indeed, I suspect that it has never even occurred to the majority of people that they can control their own state of mind.
I was recently asked the difference between a "Leader" and a "Manager or CEO". A very important question at a time when those with real leadership qualities will outshine the "normal" people who've risen to a position for which, in reality, they are ill-equipped. Which leads me to the title of this article. I prefer to be a little more upfront and call a spade a spade. Because, if you're not a "leader", regardless of what position you hold in your work or in life, you're missing out on the unlimited possibilities that life has on offer for you.
Another “New” year is upon us – but what has changed? Research (in the Universities of Chicago, Milan, Harvard – the list is quite long!) tells us that, in general, normal people lead repetitive lives where little ever changes. Sure, you might have made an important career change, met the love of your life (for now!), launched a new business, or captained your club on their way to winning the cup in the year just ended. But, so what! Little, under the skin (personal or corporate) ever really changes. How many New Year resolutions were a repeat of a previous year’s? Does t
We would all like to be more effective – to get the really important stuff done effortlessly, to simply do the things that we don’t like doing or want to do without any distraction, to get much more done to the very best of our ability in far less time and have plenty more time to do all the things that we keep promising ourselves that we will do – spend much more time doing the things that we really and truly enjoy. There you have it – my definition of personal effectiveness. How far removed is that from your ordinary daily life?
I hear from quite a number of people – clients and readers of my Personal Development Ezine – who tell me that they have become far calmer, more aware and focused as a result of the various little “mental exercises” that they undertake to banish stress and move themselves in the direction that they want their life to go. Indeed, I regularly get feedback from some clients who tell me that their lives have changed immeasurably and that they have seen some or many of their goals being achieved almost effortlessly – some have told me that it’s like ticking things off a shopping list!
I know that people are constantly striving to get more out of life. I know that many people wish for, hope for, want for more success, more happiness, more wealth. But wishing, hoping and wanting something is simply a useless mental activity - a waste of energy - because the only thing that will get you what you want is beyond wishing, hoping and wanting - it's believing. More of that later!
You don’t need self improvement. You’re perfect all ready – you just need to realize it. Some aficionados of personal development might call the process ‘self-realization’ – a big word (two actually) for something that is within every single person’s reach. There’s little pointing in clouding what comes naturally in some fog of mystique – little point in complicating the simply. Every sinlge one of us can achieve awareness and self fulfilment if we learn how to simply stop the incessant noise in our head. I think you know the noise that I’m talking about.
I’ve just spent a couple of days with a client here in the French Alps – someone who regards his personal development as of paramount importance in his life, someone who has altered his daily routine, going to bed one hour earlier to ensure that he has an extra hour each morning for meditation. He has been regularly meditating for up to an hour each morning for the last two years. The benefits? His health and fitness have greatly improved.