Darlene Lancer

Article

Narcissistic Entitlement: What You Can Do

The article explains that narcissistic entitlement is the belief that one deserves special treatment. It highlights behaviors like selfish demands, blaming others, and difficulty accepting criticism, while emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries and protecting your own wellbeing.

August 18, 2026

Article

Hidden Truth About Codependent Relationships

There’s a saying, “The ending is in the beginning.” Codependent relationship problems start with their low self-esteem, lack of boundaries, and their idealization of love—that it will solve their deeper problems, including shame, which generates beliefs such as: “If I’m loved, I’m lovable,” and “If I’m needed, I won’t be abandoned and lonely.” Codependents have fantasies of how wonderful their relationship will be, “if only…” their partner would transform (with their help.)

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Article

Are You Kind or Are You Codependent?

Do you wonder whether you're a kind, empathetic person or are you codependent? There is a difference between empathy and codependency. There are codependents who are abusers and not caring, and some people who are caring and aren't codependent. So what's the difference?

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Difference between a Strong Ego, Weak Ego, and Big Ego

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AUTHENTICITY HEALS: 6 STEPS TO BEING AUTHENTIC

Authenticity is the opposite of shame. It reveals our humanity and allows us to connect with others. Shame creates most all codependency symptoms – including hiding who we are, sacrificing our needs, and saying yes when we rather not – all to be accepted by someone else. It warps our communication and damages our relationships so that we control, patronize, criticize, blame, deny, withdraw, attack, and make empty promises to keep a relationship and reassure ourselves we’re okay even when we don’t believe it. Hiding Who You Are

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Christmas Blues? Tips to Cope with the Holidays

The stress of the holidays triggers sadness and depression for many people. This time of year is especially difficult because there’s an expectation of feeling merry and generous. People compare their emotions to what they assume others are experiencing or what they’re supposed to feel and then think that they alone fall short. They judge themselves and feel like an outsider. There’re a host of things that add to stress and difficult emotions during the holidays.

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Article

The Trap of Perfectionism

Perfectionism is an addiction, meaning we’re repeatedly unable to stop our perfectionist behaviors. Like other addictions, perfectionism varies in severity and can have negative consequences. It harms our self-esteem, make us unable to accept other people’s differences and their mistakes and flaws, and it can rob us of time with them. We require that things look or are done in a specific, “correct” way in accordance with our perfectionist standards. Some perfectionists attempt to perfect their bodies with repeated surgeries or pursue athleticism to the point of injury.

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Secrets and Lies: The Damage of Deception

<img class="alignleft wp-image-5107 size-medium" src="https://www.whatiscodependency.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/dishonesty-300x259.jpg" alt="Lies, Betrayal, Secrets, Deception, Adultery" width="300" height="259" /> Trust is a fragile. Secrets and lies jeopardize trust and can damage us and our relationships – sometimes irreparably.

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Signs of Healthy Boundaries

Healthy boundaries are essential in recovery from codependency. They both build and reflect self-esteem. Learning to have healthy boundaries is an essential aspect of individuating and becoming an individual and autonomous person.

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Maria Shriver: Hold Your Head High

It's must be cellular that a woman automatically feels humiliated when her man cheats. Maria has done nothing to be ashamed of. Too often, women feel embarrassed for their husbands' behavior, whether it's domestic violence, emotional abuse, drug or alcohol addiction, gambling, or sex addiction, and although it's fortunate that A old took responsibility for his actions, too often, those husbands shift the blame onto their wives. It's called "blaming the victim."

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6 STRATEGIES WHEN NARCISSISTS WON’T LET GO

<img class="alignleft wp-image-22176" src="https://www.whatiscodependency.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/01/lure-pexels-maël-balland-3099227-838x1024.jpg" alt="lure, bait, seduce, bait and switch" width="326" height="396" />Beware of narcissists trying to lure you back with hoovering. Breakups with narcissists don’t always end the relationship. Many won’t let you go, even when it’s they who left the relationship, and even when they’re with a new partner. They won’t accept “no.”

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10 Reasons Why Boundaries Don’t Work

Has setting limits not worked? Despite your efforts, are your boundaries often ignored? It's frustrating, but it's not always the other person’s fault. Here's why and what to do.

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Website

What is Codependency?

Informative articles, coaching, events, and resources for codependency.

April 17, 2012