Rochelle Forbes
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Article
Sometimes, Marriage Requires A Change!!!!
We are all creatures of habit. Many times we are on auto pilot. We take the same route to work everyday. We sleep on the same side of the bed every night. At the dining room table we sit in the same chair. nn While being on autopilot allows us to economize and requires less concentration on what we are doing; it is not always beneficial during challenging times in our relationships. nn Often times, spouses argue about the same subject, in the same way, and many times during t
October 12, 2008
Article
Fixing Your Marriage
Some people love to ‘Fix it all’, to the point where fixing their marriage becomes a central focus.nn While this may seem like a good idea, the challenge with it is that relationships, for the most part, are like see-saws. The more one person does something, the less the other person will do. For example, if one spouse takes out the garbage all the time, the other spouse won’t even give second thoughts to taking out the garbage. If one partner does all the l
August 23, 2008
Article
Are We Complimenting Or Criticizing Our Spouse?
Take an in depth look at your marriage; would your spouse say that you are critical or complimentary? In most cases that I have seen, the spouses said that their partners were more critical. nn If we really think about it, we are not shy about telling our love ones what we dislike about them. We inform them when they have done something wrong, disappointed us, hurt our feelings or when we are dissatisfied about an issue. nn On the other hand, we hesitate to tell them the good
August 12, 2008
Article
Approaching your Spouse
My friend James works really hard. On weekends, most times, he just wants to relax and unwind and prepare for the week ahead. His wife Sherry, on the other hand is a very active person who likes to be on the go during week ends.nn One day Sherry said to James, âI think our marriage is rather boring. All you want to do on weekends is just sit there and watch T.V and thatâs it. We seldom go out to dinner. I want our marriage to be more exciting.ânn Sure enough, James got
July 30, 2008
Article
Solving Marital Problems
Getting to the root cause of problems in a marriage can be challenging. One way of doing this is to dig into the past of each person involved, either with the help of a therapist or by yourself; to discover how past experiences helped to shape your lives today. nn While all this may be good information, giving insight on why you feel the way you do; it does not necessarily bring about change.nn You may tell your spouse that the issues you are experiencing are due to how you w
July 15, 2008
Article
Bored In Your Marriage?
I once heard a man tell me that he does not feel the same way he always felt about his marriage. I asked him "Why?" He said that his marriage lack the excitement that he see in other marriages and that it is not as glamorous as the Hollywood marriages with some of their steamy sex scenes.nn Here is the reality. Hollywood marriages are for the most part, a made up story in the minds of the writers. Their job is to entertain and make money, not to enlighten us.nn Additionally,
June 8, 2008
Article
The Marriage Disconnect
Divorce sometimes offers an illusion of happiness to people of all ages. Approximately 65% of all divorce in this country is filed by women. So why are so many women giving up on their marriages?nn During the early stages of a marriage, women are usually the premier care takers of the relationship. They are generally concerned with ideas such as: a) Are we spending enough time together b) Are the emotional needs of this relationship being met? If these two priorities are not
June 8, 2008
Article
Considered Getting A Divorce? (pt.2)
Many married people consult a divorce attorney before making a final decision on their marriage, most times to check out their rights. This is not a bad idea. However, remember that it is not the attorney's job to say to you 'try to reconcile and work things out, or seek counseling for a period.' While some of them may suggest this, it is the attorney's job to get the best settlement, and or as much time with the kids (if any are involved) that he can get for you, and also to
May 20, 2008
Article
Considered Getting A Divorce? Read This (pt.1)
Being a strong advocate of the marriage vows; I am convinced that outside of extreme circumstances such as physical or severe substance abuse, chronic infidelity, and your spouse is not willing to change any of these for the sake of the marriage, I do believe that most marriages can be saved.nn It is a known fact that Hollywood glamorise marriages and down play the pain and emotional distress of divorce. The trauma of blending families and single parenthood is not fully expos
May 19, 2008
Article
Conflict in Marriage
I have seen on many occasions where a husband and wife may have an issue. And both spouses confide in some one else outside the marriage. This has both good and bad consequences.nn First, when you share your unhappiness with some one else, what they hear is your side of the story, and your side only. Even though your feelings about your spouse are valid, they are none the less, biased. Therefore, the advise that they are giving to you is based just on your side of the story,
May 19, 2008