Square Life

Square Life
By April Lugo PhD

Chirp, chirp, chirp, you reach over and press the square button on the alarm begging for just a few more moments of rest. Your head is resting comfortably upon your square pillow as you lay resting on the square mattress covered with your square blankets. Warm and cozy. Grabbing the bottle of water sitting on your square night stand you take a long sip thinking of the daily activities you have become very accustom too.

Chirp, chirp, chirp you reach over to the square nightstand where your square alarm clock sits and you press the square off button and you begin to sit up throwing your square blankets off of you body. You slip on your slippers and run through the square doorway and into the bathroom where you relieve your bladder and then look into the square mirror that his hanging over the square sink setting into the square vanity top.

Back into the square room where your sleeps with your clothing in the square closet and in the square dresser you dress routinely, and make ready for the day.
Coffee is brewing sitting on the square counter, creamer in the square refrigerator, and the two square pieces of toast are toasting in the square toaster, and cereal from your square cereal box. You then sit at the square table reading from the square newspaper, or read from the square screen of your computer.

Looking at the square clock on the square face of the square microwave you dash out the square door and look back at the square windows on the square design called your home. You get into your square vehicle and look though the square windows as you back from the square driveway and follow the designed path that winds before you as you make way to your square office building that houses the square desk with the square computer screen and your programmed and prepared activities of the day must begin. You eat lunch in your square cubical because your workload is not done to the point that you could go to out for lunch.

As the square clock on the wall strikes five pm you punch the square time card into the square time clock going home in your square vehicle, to your square home into your square kitchen and cook your square meal, watching the news on your square television set and proceed to your square bedroom with your square bed and slowly drift off to sleep.

Does this fit many of you? Do you find your life so programmed and routine that you know how each and every piece of your life will be and in that being it all seems to fit perfectly into a square? That square holds all of your belongings your beliefs your money and your life. The square may actually take the shape of a rectangle but it has four sides and four corners. All neatly created and depended upon to make sure that nothing can change or go wrong. Nothing can be expected to be different.

The box life has become the comfort zone for many of us. Finding the security in those pre-established walls, and limitations. The established reality of existence that has become the status quo of how man and society has come to expect their life events, reactions and outcomes to be.

In the square market, pushing the square shopping cart through out the store, picking up product after product packaged in the square packaging approaching the square conveyor belt to pay at the square register with our square paper money or our square credit card.

Showering or bathing in the square bathtub holding and retaining causing the water to take the shape of that square receptacle. Many of if not all of the daily activity and routines fall into the four sides and four corners of existence that we have given power over our lives. Creating those comfort zones, those daily routines, and the reality of how far we will allow ourselves to become who what where and when of our expectations. Having given power to the square we have held ourselves in a place of fear in a place of programming, of expectations, of the physical, emotional, financial and spiritual reality we call our lives.

Let me define the square of our lives. The square of our lives is four sides with a top and a bottom and four corners. This square we could call it a box, we could call it a container we could call it us.

Where could this programming have begun? Where could this expectation have come from? Your mother was in labor, you dad drove her to the large hospital square building where your mother was placed on a square bed, in a square room, and you were born. The doctor and nurse placed you in a square bassinet, cleaned you and then swaddled you in a square blanket. You then place to sleep in a square bed or to play in a square playpen or on the floor on a square blanket.

Talk to a builder they will tell you it is easier to build things in a square with equal walls, and with the square corners. Creating the perfect box with many other boxes within it, thus removing variables of chance, change or potential failure.

Parents in the best intent will raise their children with a preconceived expectation of the child’s future. As a sports arena built and structured as an observation of activity on a square playing field. Life becomes that perfect square of expectations and reality. If something goes outside of that square playing arena it is call out of bounds and must be re-evaluated, re-played and sometimes even a penalized.

A stop at my friends to pick her up to go to a new fine dining establishment I noticed all her photos and art work on her walls were even being held in place with the proverbial square. She turned off her stereo and ejected the cd from the square drawer and placed the round disks into the square container. I just kind of chuckled to myself. We got into my square car and drove to the square building. We placed our order from the square menu and the beautiful dinnerware began to arrive at the table, in the shape of many different sized squares. The salads were served on square plates, our soup was served on square soup bowls, dinner on square plates and deserts on square plates. After a failed attempt of sipping the last drop of the wonderful soup from my square bowl using the square napkin to clean up the little bit that dribbled on my chin. I asked the waiter why the restaurant had chosen to use square servings. He informed me it was ambient and the décor design that the owners had been striving to portray, as he walked away from our square table flipping his large square napkin over his arm.

At my friends home I noticed that even when a circle was uses a square was created to contain, hold or confine the circle. How programmed, ridged and controlled had we become? I had to go home and think about this and really come to a realization that in order for everything to be ‘okay’ it had to fit inside the square.

A square can be cold, impersonal, and within the corners of the square cobwebs can form and things can begin to hide and the shadows can begin to hide away the truth of reality. A square can be hard and crisp, taking away the softness and the interactions of integrity.

But…. We live on a round earth, with planets and solar systems reaching beyond the minds of mankind’s limitations and there were no squares visible or needed to hold things in space or together. Movement forward on our square vehicles needed the circles, needed the tires to be able to move forward and with fluidity, not chunking and clumping along.

Has our life become so programmed so established that when we would move outside the square that we would be penalized? That many of us are simply chunking clunking along in life. Not willing to see that there is a reality outside of our squares? Living the boxed life!

100%
After injuring my back while driving a square bus, I could no longer sit on a square hard surface. I found that I needed to sit on a large exercise ball. This would help my muscles heal and form properly, would make for a surface that was more user friendly with my body. Allowing me to adjust and to move and to be more comfortable.
When I sat at my computer using a keyboard that was designed with a bit of a curve and what was classified as ergo dynamic, not causing my hands and arms to develop carpal tunnel began the journey of understanding that I needed to think outside of the square concept.
My day did not have to be established to fit into a prescribed set of expectations, or into the square I had learned so well to depend upon. I needed to become 100 percent in control and 100 percent accountable for myself!
While in the square it was easy to blame and say that because traffic was held up I was late, or because the alarm clock because of and power out caused me to not wake up on time to do a certain chore. That simply was something that was outside my square that kept me from staying within my square and was easy for the blame game to begin. Routine and expectations had been challenged and could never had really been my fault. Mind you had the electric bill been paid on time and had preparations for traffic been considered being on time would have been easily accomplished.
Fate has just handed me a life within this square of lack and failure and when coming to an understanding of this fact and acceptance to it then life will just become easier for me inside this square. Your dad was a doctor and you are expected to be a doctor, my grandfather before him was a doctor and so the family linage is that of doctors. My dad was a drunk and all that was ever seen in our home was the effects of alcoholism, which was the fate that was set before me to become the alcoholic of the next generation. That square of reality was set before us and those expectations are expected to be met.

The high school yearbook I was voted to be most likely to fail, how could I let my fellow classmates down? My sister was voted to be the one of her class most likely to success and I need to do my best to make sure that happens. My mother has always told me I needed to protect her and make sure she was safe and able to accomplish her schoolwork without hindrances, no matter what it cost me.
I wear a shirt with my name on it because that’s the best kind of a job I can secure. The reality is that I am one of the best mechanics in the trade for foreign cars but in the square of society ‘I’m just a mechanic’.

The reality of the blame and fate falls into the square world of our existence. In order to meet the expectations and limitations there is a variable of self-sacrifice and self esteem breakdown that has to happen in order to not be caught out of bounds. In the 60’s there was a funny sitcom that was known for their skits geared toward this topic. One of the characters would come on stage and say the devil made me do it. Rather than to take the blame or grasp the reality of their own squares being the cause of what was happening it is always easier to put the blame somewhere else on something or someone else.

Complaining is also another square concept. Because complaining actually does not accept our personal action, reaction outcome concept, it becomes easier to point the finger at others and not look inside of self.

I would be a better wife if you would listen to what I am saying. I cannot believe that you really expect me to do this for you? Just listen to people everyday and everywhere they have something to complain about, the price of gas, groceries, a sports activity for their children. How they have no time, or money.

Standing in the grocery line the woman ahead of me was having a discussion with a friend. They had just spent the last hour and a half listening to a time-share presentation. She could not believe that they expected her to sit there that long and then the gull to ask her if she was interested in spending about $1500.00 to set up her time share. All she wanted was to get a vacation and when she was invited to stay free for a week at the time-share ‘if she agreed to attend the presentation’ she could not believe that they actually expected her to attend the presentation little alone invest money. Her mind and her belief had been set to receive a free vacation and the square of it was that how dare they interfere with that belief. So she was complaining that this company had stolen her vacation from her for the one and half hours she had to give to them in showing her the time-share presentation that she had agreed to prior to accepting the invitation to stay. Upon visiting with her it became apparent that her vacation had not been as she had expected and so it was easier to complain about a presentation then it was to take responsibility for her part in her actions and in her proverbial square life that she had established.

Being the victim is a classic square life syndrome. I have been in this same job for x number of years and have been used and abused by the company. They don’t have heart they don’t care about their employees. The other day I was expected to stay and sweep up the break room after one of the employees had spilt sugar all over the floor. I didn’t even use the sugar but because I was there I was expected to clean it up. I needed a day off for a social gathering my family was having and I had forgotten to put in a request for the time off only to be told I could not take it off. How dare they! I feel like I am in the penalty square more than I am appreciated.

The engagement of self-pity and the pampering mode that comes with it the victim actually places themselves and their life aspects into a square with very high and securely intact walls. They have found that in order to be happy they need to get the attention of others in a manner that holds everything without variable. Pity me and pamper me because I have…

Another approach to the victim is that of how can I elevate myself inside this square by belittling or making the other feel like they are the victims? I spilled the sugar on the floor and I am going to make someone of lesser stature than myself have to clean up after me. I am making sure to keep them in their place. I am so much better and above them.

When we look at the 100 percent life we are looking at who we are what we have done to create that and what we have learned to portray. In reality when we look at our role in the processes of life we realize that we are either living the programmed square life aware and taking responsibility for it or we are looking for ways to make it someone or something else problem. Taking responsibility and looking outside of the square programming then gives everyone the option to see their roles and their place in the big scheme of things.

When blaming others and complaining the power has been shifted and it is no longer you in control of your life. It is handing over on a silver platter your energy, your power and your personality. Keeping you confined to the blame game square. Like framing yourself inside the walls of the lack and limitations that come with this action. Believing that you are the fate caused by another hold you held with your hands in the square handcuffs of a lie. Stepping outside of the fate lie one can then become who they are truly meant to be. As well as when we stop being the victims or creating victim roles that is when the personal power and life force of truth in existence then it all can start to melt the walls of the square.

I know a man whose father was a drug user and ended up in prison. He watched his mother work a couple jobs and put herself through school to become a professional. She did the best she could to raise her children to become responsible and positive individuals. One of her children found it easier to stay inside the square of fate and victimization ending up in jail, where the other son watched the determination and drive of his mother he became an upright citizen, making good money not accepting the square of fate, blame or complaining.

A 100 percent life does not blame others nor does it expect others to take blame or responsibility for their path their journey or their lives. If you answered the question do you take responsibility for your life what would your answer be? Most would say yes I take responsibility but in fact they will blame, or complain about things.

Some 100 percent situations could be that square light has been red too long, no that light is on a timer and it changes on a set time. You are the one that is being impatient. That light turned red just as I came up to it and there is no one else at the intersection, that light turned red just to slow me down. When you read that do you hear the silliness in the statement? How many of us think that exact thing when we are approaching an intersection, there is no one else at the light and it changes from green to red. There was not a little guy sitting in the traffic signal waiting and watching for the perfect time to change to mess with your schedule. Taking responsibility would be I’m driving down the highway and I know there is a good change that that light will be changing to red because it’s been green now for the past two or three minutes and there is a good chance it’s going to change for me so I will be prepared to stop if I need too.

I attended an event because I was sent an email asking me to come and support the group. The event cost $20.00, I was not going to go and waste my $20 because I did not want to spend that much money to attend, but I was asked to come to be a support for the cause. After attending you are asked for the $20. You feel how dare they ask me for that. I didn’t want to come anyway. The 100 percent life would say, I made the decision to attend knowing the fee was $20, so I need to pay my share, paying even before being asked would even be more appropriate.

I read the job description and took the job that was offered to me for the money I was offered the job at. now I feel like they are taking advantage of me. I got this job when I needed it, my house was about to be foreclosed on and my car had been repossessed. It really came in when I needed it. Now I am doing better my house payments are even ahead and I have a newer car than the one I had before and the make and model I wanted. But how dare they take advantage of me. The company has changed it doesn’t have a heart. The managers are mean and make us work overtime. 100 percent life sees that this job was a blessing and came at a time of need. In that space of time things have had the opportunity to get better for me. I am very grateful for this. The company seems to be changing and not in a manner that I feel is best for my personal needs. I believe I will look elsewhere or address my concerns with management, seeing what ‘I’ can do to make this better. Owning yourself and your own responsibility to the job is stepping into the 100 percent arena. Maybe when you were in a more desperate state you did not see it as abuse when they would ask you to do more than you had originally agreed too. See your role in the story see your reaction to the action and evaluate where you fit into the outcome.

My car broke down, I’m so irritated with owning this ‘Ford’ I knew I should have gotten a ‘Dodge’. Mind you the check engine light has been on for the last month, you have not gotten an oil change for over a year, nor have you had the radiator flushed and the hoses and belts checks since you purchased the car. Needless to say tune up, what the heck is a tune up. It would not have mattered what car you had. If you do not give it maintenance it will eventually need the work by force or by the owner deciding to be responsible and take care of it. The 100 percent life will step up to the plate and will do what needs to be done to take care of what belongs to you.

I’ve done this master cleanse diet and did so good. My body has never felt so good. I can feel the toxins have been released and removed. I feel like a well-oiled machine. Hi, Pizza delivery can you bring me a double cheese, pepperoni, mushroom, anchovies, sausage, large pizza with cheesy bread sticks and a 2 lite of Pepsi. That diet did nothing for me. I feel bloated and constipated. I guess those health nuts really don’t know what they are talking about. The 100 percent life would say I ordered the pizza I ate the whole thing, and now I am paying the price. I really fell off the wagon so to speak. I need to get back on a healthy eating plan and soon.

I just have no time to do the things I want to do. Really? If you want something bad enough you will step outside the square and you will find a way to make it happen. You said you don’t have enough time to do what you want to do but you had time to stop at the corner bar and have a few beers on the way home. The 100 percent life will say I have to learn to use my time more wisely. I need to make sure I am thinking about everything and every action because I know there is a reaction. If I chose to stop and have a couple beers and hang with the guys for a couple hours and now I don’t have time to help my wife clean the gutters, I just don’t have enough time. There needs to be a responsibility awakening that says I chose to spend my time how I want and I need to learn to manage it more to do the things I want and need.

Excuses are limitations that fit inside the square of our lives perfectly. They are fine tuned and developed to strengthen the walls of that square and when you look in the corners you will find the excuses hiding as dust bunnies. When called out the excuses then realize that they are just that excuses and limitations that have held you back from living the 100 percent life.

I can’t believe you are so dumb. Why can’t you shut up? I can’t believe you even came out of my body. Why can’t you be like your brother or your sister? Your room is such a mess. You wanted this animal so you better take care of it or I’m going to get rid of it. I can’t believe that you’re such a moron. As harsh as these words may sound they are spoken daily. They are a way to the means of making one self feel better than another. This type of behavior and words are used for the building of the square life that harms and injures others, simply to justify the authority and rigid belittlement of another for selfish gain for personal edification. The 100 percent life looks at this and says, how can I help you figure this out, finding a way to express the role I have played in the creation of the situation. Addressing and looking at the weaknesses in my own life that have caused me to feel the need to lash out at others to belittle them so that they feel less than me. I once read a statement that said in order for someone to belittle or to bring me down means I was above them in order for them to feel the need to bring me down. The walls of this square not only limits and holds others back and down but also then create a square walled life where guilt, anger, resentment, blame, guilt and complaining become the norm. Causing the cycles to be passed from one generation to another. Owning responsibility for the action of the past and healing that within oneself is vital and helping the others to realize that the programming, actions were not proper and helping those affected by the behavior of others that they do not have to believe the lies and that they do have worth. This then helps the person to know that they can too live a 100 percent life. Not one that they were programmed to believe but one that is truth within themselves.

When living in this square the individual who may have been spoken to in such a manner, mentioned above, will find them selves patterning this behavior because it is something that they have learned to expect and perform. Their boss may tell them you didn’t make quota I can’t figure out why we hired you? You can’t even record 2 minutes of footage for the video we are shooting so you are such a moron. The behavior square of expectation will remain in tact, and the individual will live that life over and over and over. When a 100 percent life will say I do not have to live life like this. I am better, I can do this, I can have that. The 100 percent life will not believe and continue to live the lie that they have been programmed to believe.

Next on this topic is if you feel this poorly about yourself and the square of your existence you need to take ownership and fix that part of your reality that has this feeling of lack and low self esteem. Blowing someone else out because you do not feel good about your own life or you have the need to belittle others to make yourself feel good and empowered then it is time to remove your own square and accept 100 percent responsibility for yourself and who you have become. See yourself your worth your reality in truth not in the lie you have accept and felt the need to extend or ‘throw up’ on others.

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