Addiction is a chronic condition that may lead to other consequences that can significantly destabilize a family. There is a lot more involved with addiction than what may appear on the surface. The issues that can arise due to addictions involve communication problems, violence or aggressive behavior, mood swings, financial issues, work-related issues, and legal issues, for example, driving under the influence.
In addition to that, your spouse may not be able to fulfill their obligations to you and your children. Worse still, some partners may blame their spouse for their addiction issues.
In Northerm Virgina for example, addiction is a problem for so many couples as it is all over America. Getting effective treatment at a recovery center may be the key.
Because of the many issues associated with addiction, the marriage relationship usually get strained making the sober partner feel helpless.
If you need to help an addicted partner, you need to help them to effectively recover while you remain as stable as you possibly can. There are various things you can do to help an addicted spouse. Below is a suggestion on how you can help an addicted partner.
1. Take Care of Yourself and Your Little Ones
Addiction is a big trial for a relationship. As much as you don’t have control over your partner’s addictions, however, you have a responsibility to provide a stable environment to you and your other loved ones.
You need to put your needs and the needs of your other family member’s first as you plan to help your addict partner. For example, you need to support your children in their education and school activities even if your spouse is unable to do so because of addictions.
You also need to continue valuing family routines such as going out together, having meals together even if your partner is not able to join in. Most of all, you need to maintain a healthy social life with your extended family members and friends.
Because the situation may be very overwhelming, it is important that you seek the help of a support group. And because your loved one will need support to recover, you and all your family members will need counseling and therapy to know how to assist them effectively.
Your ultimate plan and priority should be to get your spouse into a treatment program. But as you plan to do so, get your self into a support group, physical or even an online group initially.
2. Communicate with Your Partner
You need to discuss the addiction issue with your spouse when they are sober, and both of you are composed. The aim of talking with your partner is so that they can accept being assisted in recovering from addictions. If your partner agrees to be supported, then seek an addiction rehabilitation center for them that can also support your family. Noteworthy, there are over 14,000 rehabilitation centers for addicts in the USA including or own Northern Virginia. You will need to identify one near where you stay where your partner can get help. Luckliy, expert ghelp is at hand at the Encore recovery center, Arlington VA.
But in case your partner is defensive and not willing to discuss the issue, then you may need to seek outside intervention without their consent. Eventually, you need to get your loved one into a treatment program whether they see the need of it or not.
3. Plan an Intervention with Concerned Individuals
If your partner refuses to be assisted, then you have to seek intervention. Start by planning a meeting with anyone affected by your spouse’s addiction and your spouse’s immediate family members.
You can include coworkers, siblings, parents, neighbors, and his or her close friends. Usually, you will plan an intervention meeting with the concerned without the knowledge of your partner. It is important to involve the human resource department of your spouse in his recovery path.
When you meet with the interventionists, discuss treatment options, and how to fund the treatment and when and how to talk to your partner with their help. Then plan a meeting with your spouse and the concerned. The meeting should state your concerns and the effects of the addiction to his or her work, family, and marriage.
Consider getting a professional interventionist on board to help with the process. Please note that drugs can cause a person to be aggressive and violent. You need a professional interventionist to handle the situation.
5. Get Involved In Your Partner’s Recovery Plan
First, you need to learn about addictions, treatment plans, and addiction’s recovery. The essence of supporting a loved one is to encourage them to be responsible for their recovery from addiction. They have to be willing to be assisted. Your work involves offering education, support, and advice to help them achieve their goals of recovery.
Worth noting is that every individual is unique. Their cause of addiction is different meaning that they should also have a unique recovery plan.
6. Seek Spousal Therapy Sessions
Remember that you are not alone, and there are support systems in the community to help you and your spouse cope with the addiction. Once your partner starts getting treatment, then you need to start the recovery process for your marriage. Therefore, join a support group for addict families and attend with your spouse.
Which? Al-Anon is one of the largest well known and highly supportive groups. It is specific to alcohol and is based on a 12 step program. Families and also colleagues and friends can go to these meeting even if the person that they are worried about has not even acknowledged their own problem with alcoholism.
For drug-specific support there is Nar-Anon. It is another 12-step program similar to Al-Anon that helps anybody that if trying to support or is being affected by a friend or partner who is a drug addict.
There is an excellent meeting of Nar-Anon every Sunday at Sunday Serenity, 601 South Carlin Springs Road, Arlington, Virginia. The location is the Carlin Springs Health Pavillion.
There are so many more, so ask around or search Google for a local support group.
These groups are a huge resource for loved ones that care about another who is being ravaged by drugs, even if they do not recognize yet that they have a problem.
Sitting in a room and discussing the sordid details openly in a supportive environment is a huge relief for many who thought they were alone. If you think your experiences are too ‘out there’ there is always somebody who has had it ‘worse’ than you.
More Ways to Help an Addicted Person Recover
Addiction is straining to any relationship whether the addicted person is a close family member, friend, or workmate. The main challenge is finding effective ways to help the addicted person to recover.
As much as many individuals are willing to support their loved ones recover from addiction, they often get overwhelmed with the process because they don’t know what how to go about it.
It is also because the recovery period varies from individual to individual with some individuals taking many years to recover. Here is how you can help a loved one recover from addiction.
7. Get Informed About Addiction and Recovery
To be able to help an addicted person, you need to be patient, knowledgeable, and understanding. It is essential for you to support your loved one instead of condemning them. By understanding about addiction, you will be able to support them better because you get to realize that the situation is out of their control.
Learn about addiction so that you can easily relate with your loved one’s condition and also so that you can monitor their progress. Try to understand the issues, habits, and other extended issues that caused your loved one to get addicted. By learning about addiction, you can know early warning signs of regression and how to address them.
By learning about addiction, you will also know the different treatment plans available and identify one that can suit your loved one. For example, you can decide on outpatient versus an inpatient treatment addiction treatment plan.
Learn about recovery and all the challenges that come with it. Get to know possible triggers to your loved one’s addiction. You will also need to understand ways of coping with cravings.
You can agree with your addicted loved one in advance of the steps you will take in case of a relapse. Among the steps you can take are getting treatment providers involved.
8. Get a Comprehensive Addiction Treatment Plan for Your Loved One
You do not need to get overwhelmed by your loved one’s addiction. Just hoping for the best is not an option. It will usually lead to failure. So make sure that there is an end game … imagine yourself with your loved one, and they are free from addiction, happy and living a good life to the fullest. Keep this in your mind as you go through the various battles ahead.
The most important thing is to put your loved one on a recovery plan for their addiction. What is needed is a battle plan. A holistic addiction treatment plan is needed so you are armed in the fight (and it is a fight) against addiction.
You may seek assistance from an addiction center or rehabilitation center that offer a comprehensive addiction treatment plan.
9. Inpatient or Outpatient Treatment
A lot goes into deciding the appropriate addiction treatment plan for your loved ones. You need to evaluate all the factors and decide whether your loved one needs an inpatient or outpatient treatment plan.
Inpatient means your loved one staying at a specialized facility.Outpatient means meetings and working with a professional, but staying at home.
10. Group or Individual Therapy
The best way to help your loved one is to identify a good support group for them. Therapy can be as an individual or as a group or a combination of the two. It is vital to encourage a loved one to get assistance from peer support organizations such as Narcotics Anonymous (NA) or Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). You can also learn the different strategies used by the peer support group and then help a loved one adopt them in their life.
11. Medication
Your loved one may need to see a medical doctor periodically and work with the medical caregiver of treatments that can stop their cravings. Drugs used for this include Naltrexone and Buprenorphine, which either block or reduce the effects of drugs on the addict's cravings.
You need to support your loved one to follow through with their treatment. If they do not take them, they will be of little use. The addicted mind is a mind that has for many years, only being used to find and take the addicts drug choice. It will scheme to stop taking any medication that gets in its way to find that drug.
There are also several medications that are not suitable for drug addicts. Some seemingly innocent everyday drugs are actually capable of creating a new addiction. Drugs such as Zyrtec, Dextromethorphan, Codeine, Fentanyl, and Morphine Sulfate are all drugs to be avoided. They are mood enhancers of a fashion, and so the addicted mind can soon ‘jump ship’ and start a whole new problem.
12. Go for Specialized Family Therapy
As your loved one goes through a recovery process, they need a recovery of their relationships that were affected by addiction. First and foremost, you and any other family member may need therapy to cope with the effects of having dealt with an addict. Then and only then can you be able to support your loved one with their recovery.
Apart from that, you need to go through additional therapy to help you know how to support your loved one as they go through recovery.
13. Support the Family on Behalf of Your Loved One
The last thing an addicted person needs is stress, which comes up as a result of friction at home or workplace. Actually, stress can lead the addicted person to regress. In this case, show your loved one that you care by understanding when they are not able to perform their family responsibilities as expected. It is essential to be realistic of your expectations about family and work responsibilities. You can also support them by taking off some of their work or home responsibilities to give them time to attend therapy and peer support meetings.
14. Help Your Loved One to Form New Lifestyle Habits
An addict is not able to limit their use of alcohol or drugs, and therefore, it is imperative for your loved one to avoid alcohol and or drugs. Do not consider controlled use but rather total abstinence.
Recovery requires a change in lifestyle habits. You need to identify the habits that made your loved one addicted in the first place. Then find ways of replacing the habits with healthy habits that do not involve addictions.
Conclusion
Recovery from addiction is a process. Your marriage will stand the test if you get professional help for yourself, your spouse, and your family.
Remember … you are not alone even though it can feel like that all too often.
Resources
Northern Virginia recovery center - https://encorerecovery.com/
https://www.health.harvard.edu/newsletter_article/Addiction_and_the_prob...
Nar-Anon - https://www.nar-anon.org/
Narcotics Anonymous - https://www.na.org/
Virginia treatmen centers - https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/treatment-rehab/virginia
Author, Freelance writer