Creating peace in our relationships

I was inspired to write on creating peace in relationships because of a client that recently came to me. She has been suffering for a long time due to an unrequited friendship and as much as she tried, she was harbouring feelings of anger, hatred and sadness within herself, and it was affecting her life.

I was glad that I was able to help her with EFT as EFT is a tool that can swiftly clear emotional blockages of any kind, whether it's trauma, health-related, grief, depression, etc. We spent a total of less than 90 minutes clearing her feelings towards her friend and she felt that she was able to emotionally let go of this friend by the end of our work together.

Now I find that the real test of any emotional work done is what happens when you encounter the actual person or situation. This particular client hasn't heard from the other person despite her numerous emails and SMSes to her for a few months, but after our session, this is what she emailed me.

"...Strangely, this evening, she suddenly SMSed me out of the blue, Lena! So we have been communicating rather intensely tonight via SMS. I think, Lena - without the two sessions with you, I would not be able to cope with the SMSes tonight. I think I would have been more explosive, angrier and more unhappy. But tonight I felt forgiving and I felt love. I didn't think I could feel these things so soon..."

The magic words "forgiving" and "love" jumped out of her email at me and brought joy to my heart. When it comes to relationships, the ideal outcome that I always aim to bring my client towards is one of forgiveness and love. Two of the most powerful vibrations in the universe that can truly bring healing on all levels - physical, emotional, mental and spiritual.

Yet how many of us can truly feel forgiveness and love to all the people who have been or are in our lives? How many of us, no matter how much we know we shouldn't, continue to hold feelings of resentment, hatred and sadness towards persons in our lives who have done us wrong?

Negative feelings are negative energies, and they can literally poison our bodies, causing illness to arise. I once had a client who had pain in his shoulders after a stroke that happened years ago, and couldn't lift up his hand beyond a certain level. Through our EFT work, we discovered that the stroke happened in conjunction with a conflict he had with a family member, and till this day, he still hated that person and avoided all contact. By the end of the session, he was able to forgive that family member, and to both of our surprise, he lifted his arm all the way up to his head without any pain at all! On top of that, he told me that he planned to visit that family member to make amends!

Now ask yourself these questions. Do you have chronic pain in your body? Do you have unresolved conflicts towards certain people in your lives? If the answer to both questions is yes, then the pain could very well be related to the fact that you have not healed those relationships yet.

Sooo.... Here's a tapping exercise you may want to use:

Tapping on the Karate Chop point, say "Even though I have this pain in my _____ (the body part where the pain is located) and it may be there because I haven't been able to forgive ______ (the person/s that you cannot forgive), I choose to acknowledge all my emotions towards him/her/them, and I give myself permission to let go of all the unresolved conflict, so that I can be healthy, and more than that, I can truly be free."

Tap on the remaining EFT points noticing the thoughts and emotions that arise as you do so.

If you have trouble clearing all the negative emotions and healing yourself completely, I welcome you to arrange for a session with me by going to my website www.lenashealinghaven.com and sending me an email from the homepage. The EFT healing process is very natural and simple, and you might be amazed at how much difference a single EFT session might make!