Dr. Romance on men and biological clocks:
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Yes, a man can feel the need to grow up and have a family, especially when he finds a woman who inspires those feelings in him. The problem is, how can you be sure the match is a good one?
You’d think the positive ... Views: 3
When it comes to talking to people that one’s knows and gets on with, there is not going to be any thought as to whether one will be accepted by them. And this is because at a deeper level they know that the other person accepts them.
So unless there is so kind of tension or something ... Views: 15
I have written in this column recently about emotional hygiene, and doing the necessary maintenance on feelings as well as your physical body and household. Health reminders tell us to wash our hands frequently to prevent transmittal of diseases. Did you know you can “wash” your ... Views: 9
Do you know that old negative emotional baggage is something you don't have to carry on your back for the rest of your life? Do you know it's rooted in subconsciously stored negative memories from the past that can be permanently deleted much like an outdated computer file? Do you know this will ... Views: 4
Mixing business with pleasure is a very bad idea, according to many. However, staying in the office and working long hours have become so common that the workplace has eventually turned into a place where potential lovers meet. Career experts explain that while it is true that you can't choose ... Views: 13
Dear Dr. Romance: I read your newsletter "How to Heal a Rift with an Adult Child" with joy, how you simplify things for us. I already tried by email, but it got more complicated.
I received two emails, the second one, had a picture with the message ''see what you ... Views: 21
Do you know most people find out too late they've been stuck in the habit of making bad choices when it comes to a partner? Do you know these choices are not made from a place of freewill consciousness rather are driven by deeply buried co-dependency needs programmed into the subconscious mind ... Views: 10
Emotional baggage is a term often used to describe the weight of limitation in the form of negative beliefs, perceptions, feelings, habits and behaviors that blocks us from realizing a joyful and fulfilling life. All of the above reside within your unconscious mind as a series of negative ... Views: 9
Do you know that without realizing it most individuals have been programmed with a simple "equation" that fundamentally stands in the way of fully embodying their self esteem? That equation is based on the conditioned notion that: one's self esteem is proportional to what one owns. Do you know ... Views: 14
Do you know that it's possible to permanently, positively and significantly boost your self esteem in a very short time simply by recognizing and deleting old negative emotional baggage stored in the subconscious mind? Do you know that such baggage is the primary cause of low self esteem and ... Views: 10
When one has the desire to be in a relationship with someone, they are going to have certain expectations. And the same can be said when one is already in a relationship. Now, there is the chance that one is completely aware of what these are and at the same time, there is the chance that they ... Views: 22
Sustaining intimacy and fulfillment in a romantic relationship can be challenging. Often couples find themselves lacking true connection with each other as the daily routine of their lives take over.
Intimacy is a creation that has to be cultivated and tended to. When we take time to ... Views: 17
The time during and post childbirth for a mother is signified by GIVING. No matter if you nurse or not you give continually to your baby for months. The first step to returning to intimacy is to give to yourself: This starts with listen more deeply to yourself and having moments and practices to ... Views: 11
(A simple way to let go with dignity)
"The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread." Mother Teresa
If schools had offered a course called "Breaking up is hard to do", I suspect we all would have enrolled. Why aren't we taught these difficult challenges ... Views: 23
When is a "loving" relationship not a loving relationship? Well when the individuals in it are motivated to enter into it not by love but by fear impersonating love. So when does fear impersonate love?
Well when one is devoid of an experience of true love and rather is mired in fears that ... Views: 18
Do you know that many people are not fully mature enough to have healthy relationships? Do you know this immaturity manifests as a fear of being alone, fear of abandonment, feelings of jealousy and insecurity, controlling and manipulative behaviors, fears of commitment and intimacy, self ... Views: 16
Have you ever felt moved while listening to a charismatic motivational speaker?
If you boil down to one factor what it was that moved you what would that be?
Well likely that the speaker was appealing to you as a human being, that is to your emotional heart. He/She likely awakened the ... Views: 19
One of the most significant characteristics of successful people is the ability to speak or express one's self confidently in public. Such individuals often convey a charisma that is contagious and that draws admiration, respect, trust and positive opportunities their way.
If I said to you ... Views: 16
There Is No Quick & Easy One-Size Fits All Success Prescription. So Why Do You Keep Looking?
Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson.
There is a very fundamental principle of psychology that ... Views: 45
Dear Dr. Romance:Thank you for your free articles, you have a lot of good stuff in there. A couple of the girls at work and I read your articles and get a good laugh. You're giving advice assuming that our lives are what YOU consider normal. You have a good job, make good money, live in a ... Views: 44
I'm updating my book The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again. The new version will be called Dr. Romance's Guide to Dating in the Digital Age. The following article is excerpted from the new book.
A lot of the problems that come up in dating again are generated by social expectations (how ... Views: 47
Whether someone is in a relationship with another person or not, they are still going to experience pain. This could relate to certain disagreements that one has with the person they are in a relationship with on one side and on the other, it could include different kinds of abuse for ... Views: 45
Are you one of those unfortunate individuals who not only engages self sabotaging behaviors but then finds a harsh inner critic beating up on you making you feel guilty, bad, inadequate, stupid, incompetent, incapable, depressed, unmotivated and like giving up on your success?
Did you know ... Views: 28
Dear Dr. Romance:
I read your article about RESCUING: "Avoiding the Drama Triangle". I have been rescuing my mother from the big bad wolf my father. He would beat my mother, beat me, and beat my sister. I decided to rescue her. She decided for me to rescue her from her ... Views: 46
How are you limiting yourself to limit your partner? What are the consequences of this?
"As long as you keep a person down, some part of you has to be down there to hold him down, so it means you cannot soar as you otherwise might." ~Marian Anderson 1902-1993, Concert ... Views: 17
Hello everyone and welcome new members
One of the most common challenges I have heard my clients express is their difficulty to deal with or accept changes. Whether it is a change at work, at home, in their relationships, in their body, in their income or lifestyle; they all find it ... Views: 30
Do you know most people feel a vague sense of emotional inertia that makes them feel like they are stuck in a life of quiet desperation? Do you know most never learn what is holding them captive and therefore never truly experience the freedom of a fulfilling and expansive life?
Do you know ... Views: 35
There are 7 Vital Principles that make Great Leaders Great. Knowing what they are and how to cultivate them is essential for success.
First and foremost it is necessary to appreciate that great leadership is about building positive, strong and cooperative relationships. In that light what is ... Views: 38
Have you ever noticed how often you repeat the same negative patterns of behavior, find yourself attracting partners with the same negative qualities as in your past relationships, making the same kinds of mistakes or bad judgments, and continue to repeat the same self sabotaging habits? Have ... Views: 20
As a Psychologist, Dr. Romance knows that when we're surrounded by images of violence, it becomes "normalized" and we stop seeing it as unusual.
Anyone who watches the news is becoming aware that we live in a violent society: According to the Peace Alliance:
• ... Views: 36
Healthy relationships are built on a foundation, or infrastructure, of clear thinking, problem solving, and mutual support. Any willing couple can learn to build a happy relationship, if they stop reacting and learn to respond thoughtfully. As an individual you have ideas and beliefs about how ... Views: 53
When we live with someone we have to share many things from food to bed. In couples, usually arguments arise due to having a contradictory point of view about one object. Do you want to know what is the real truth about your partner with respect to love, sex and intimacy? Are you aware of your ... Views: 36
No matter what one has achieved or how old they are, they are going to times when they need another person’s guidance. And through another person’s guidance, one will learn about what they need to do in order to move forward in life or to undertake a certain task for instance.
This can take ... Views: 52
Parents do have a strong effect on their childrens personalities. Usually their attitude towards their kids and towards others is very important. Most of parental concerns are about kids education, leisure, social life and behavior in general, in terms of how they are getting along with all ... Views: 40
Dear Dr. Romance,
I love reading your articles here and on Divine Caroline, and I always look forward to the new ones. I have a long time online friend. We have been friends for about three-four years, and I even felt I was in love with him for a while - and told him so. He said he ... Views: 65
Maintaining long-term relationships can be a complex undertaking that requires significant time and attention. When things begin to go wrong, partners can take proactive steps to get the relationship back on track. These efforts can often make the difference between strengthening the partnership ... Views: 74
Do you know that through the Law of Attraction the majority of individuals attract negative rather than positive experiences into their lives? Do you know this is because a poorly known concept called their Magnetic Polarity is actually negative?
Do you know that a human being's Magnetic ... Views: 56
Have you ever been told that you were passive aggressive? This is not the most endearing of titles to be given by anyone. Why is that?
Well because it implies a number of things:
1. That you have trouble being open and honest about your feelings.
2. That you grudgingly accept something ... Views: 36
We see a lot of advice to write down your goals and dreams, but does it really help? Actually, it does. For one thing, it helps you get clear on exactly what you want, and makes the goals more imaginable. They seem more real when you have thought through them clearly and written them ... Views: 53
Extreme makeovers are all the rage these days, with botox injection parties, and reality shows. Plastic surgery is on the rise. Many people are trying to match the extraordinary measures actors and actresses go through to look perfect on the screen. These are shortcuts taken to try to ... Views: 40
What is radical ownership? It’s seeing and owning that life is a mirror reflecting me back to me. All the things that happen in my life have one thing in common…ME. I am the common denominator in all that keeps showing up. Mike Dooley describes it beautifully in his Notes from The Universe: ... Views: 35
In my youth and throughout most of my early adult years I suffered from paralyzing shyness.
Early in my life I was so anxious about meeting and speaking with people that I would find myself making every excuse possible to avoid social engagements.
I suffered especially during my medical ... Views: 32
Isn't that what women expect and desire from a confident man? Of course most women expect that their man will have the maturity and the courage to be openly emotional when the moment calls for it. Yet many men find themselves severely handicapped in this department, often without really knowing ... Views: 35
There are many things that one can do to make a positive impression and this is going to include the impression one makes when they meet someone for the first time and in their existing relationships.
And as human beings are not perfect, it is only natural that they are going to do things ... Views: 56
Dear Dr. Romance
Your web-site impressed me and prompted this note, and I'd appreciate your thoughts.I am a reasonably well-educated individual which includes a couple of degrees in psychology and have been quite successful in my career. My wife who is also well-educated and our ... Views: 51
I met a guy a year ago. We dated weekly for 2 months. Our dates were fun and passionate.
Then after that he started asking me out on dates every couple weeks or so for the next 4 months. The dates were still very passionate and so much fun.
One day he started to invite me ... Views: 58
“We’re drifting apart,” Sara said during our first meeting. Her husband, Daniel, agreed. They got along well enough, but lived more like roommates than a married couple.
It’s not just couples who drift apart, of course. Friends lose touch, colleagues move on, children forget ... Views: 49
Dear friend, asking for what you want—and setting boundaries around what you don’t want—is a key life skill. But sometimes in our enthusiasm to practice this skill, we over-do our own assertiveness and end up with a partner who shuts down, gets angry or feels resentful. Here are four tips for ... Views: 48
Discover how to manage panic in a way that allows it to dissipate rather than escalate.
"That's the strange thing about panic – when we lean into it, it loosens it's grip on us." Daniel Siegel, M.D.
"The power of reflection allows us to approach, rather than ... Views: 32
Do you know that most people, without realizing it automatically operate from a series of subconsciously driven programs that cause them by default to feel and behave like dependent, small, helpless and needy children? Do you know this makes them unattractive, unsuccessful in relationships, feel ... Views: 42