Do you continually undermine your own success financially, in your career, in your relationships, in the manner in which you make daily choices etc.? Have you ever wondered why you have been cursed with such an impediment? Did you know that don't have to be or feel like a slave to this pattern ... Views: 27
Have you ever felt so unhappy in a relationship but could not muster up the courage to discuss your feelings with your partner? So instead, in order to rectify things, although you may not have felt this was what you were actually doing at the time, you chose to use self sabotage as a way ... Views: 7
There are people I love who are easy to be around, and others I love who are more difficult for me. It’s not that they’re bad people, others get along with them fine, and, actually, so do I. It’s just that I have to work a little bit more to understand what they mean, to ... Views: 23
Isn't that what women expect and desire from a confident man? Of course most women expect that their man will have the maturity and the courage to be openly emotional when the moment calls for it. Yet many men find themselves severely handicapped in this department, often without really knowing ... Views: 13
I was a bit emotional today. My son was scheduled for his 15-month check up tomorrow. His pediatrician calls, and I miss it. I return the call, and luckily I do, because she tells me my son is no longer covered by his insurance. What? I am shocked. As I dial the number to his insurance, I can ... Views: 24
When I read a recent article citing single mothers for the recent decline in newspaper sales I was appalled. I couldn't believe Chris Powell, the Managing Editor of the Journal Inquirer, actually blamed single moms for his not being able to sell more newspapers. What shocked me even more than ... Views: 11
As another year winded down and a new one begins, I feel a sense of pressure. Don't get me wrong I'm excited to see where this next year leads, but there's this thing creeping up. I have successfully pushed it away before, but I feel it coming again. I used to work in a restaurant, so every New ... Views: 18
Even through my 38 weeks of pregnancy, I never once imagined what motherhood would be like. I really never thought about being a single mom. Yes, you hear things will change, but I never truly understood it, which seems to be the case with most things, until you experience them.
After ... Views: 9
Positive and Negative Intentions are Directions.
Which Direction do you Choose?
The past couple of days I've been covering the topic of love. I stated that love is a choice based on your intentions/thoughts not your feelings. I also pointed out that in order to start attracting more ... Views: 19
Why do most relationships fail? Is it because of a fear of commitment, a fear of being honest, a fear of intimacy, the result of co-dependent neediness, etc.? Well would you be surprised that many of these are only the surface veneer to a much deeper problem that each individual presents with ... Views: 32
Do you know the main reasons individuals remain trapped in bad relationships is because they are: Afraid of being alone, Afraid they won't be able to take care of themselves and Afraid of being responsible for their own lives? Do you know that such fears leave them vulnerable to exploitation and ... Views: 14
Do you know that through the Law of Attraction the majority of individuals attract negative rather than positive experiences into their lives? Do you know this is because a poorly known concept called their Magnetic Polarity is actually negative? Do you know that a human being's Magnetic ... Views: 15
Do you know that most people walk around in a self sabotaging trance? Do you know most don't realize they are asleep and their minds have been hijacked? Do you know reading this will help you to momentarily wake up, notice your state of enslavement and motivate you to take back your mind and ... Views: 13
One area that is sometimes overlooked when scheduling your kids’ time is how important it is to allow independent play.
It might not be necessary to have a literal scheduled block of time for play, especially if play still comes naturally to both you and your children, but if you find that ... Views: 28
Jealousy can be one of the most and disruptive and harmful of emotions. Often jealousy in relationships is directed at the present or the future. It is rooted in a fear of future loss - fear that one may lose their partner to something that is happening currently, or might happen in the ... Views: 25
Do you know that all relationship conflict arises because old emotional "buttons" are re-triggered which sets off an "emotional storm" rooted in earlier negative relationship experiences of abuse, humiliation, betrayal, rejection, abandonment, etc. stored as negative memories in the subconscious ... Views: 32
The heartbreak of a breakup can leave painful scars on the Heart that often must be defended at all costs. Unfortunately this undermines one's courage to open themselves up again to a new potential lover in the same unbridled and authentic way. Sadly this leads to inauthentic or falsely ... Views: 8
Do you know that all relationship conflicts arise because of unconsciously held co-dependent patterns held by each partner? Do you know such patterns are rooted in early negative relationship experiences stored in the subconscious mind as negative memories or rejection, abuse, abandonment, ... Views: 13
Dear Dr. Romance:
I'm a 70-yr old man who has been married more than forty years. I read your article "Autonomy and Dependency" I feel like I've been in a codependency relationship the last fifteen years and havedeveloped anxiety & depression. My wife is a ... Views: 30
I was speaking with a client today about his burn-out in his career. This is a man who’s been very successful, earned a lot of money, and worked hard for a big, national corporation. I told him he was burned-out, and on strike, because he had put himself in a box about work. The box ... Views: 41
Do you know that neediness hijacks the mind and causes one to make choices based on feelings of insecurity, fears of being abandoned or rejected, jealousy, etc.? Do you know this not only makes one feel and appear unattractive it also leaves them feeling out of control and unable to discern ... Views: 20
Do you know that feelings of jealousy are a) not a sign of how much you love someone b) make you a potentially controlling, needy, unattractive person and c) has the tendency to destroy your relationships?
Do you also know that these negative feelings were actually imprinted "into" you as a ... Views: 18
FAILURES NOT AN OPTION:
NEVER GIVE UP!
So often we miss out on God’s best because we give up too soon.
As you all know, I'm going through a very difficult time in my life right now. Not a day goes by when I don't feel like throwing in the towel and just giving up. But when I sit still ... Views: 28
How would our country change if politicians had to learn to love themselves and others before taking office?
What if politicians had to be mentally evaluated before running for office? How many of them would pass as being emotionally stable and healthy?
What difference might it make ... Views: 23
Are statistics about the odds of women finding love and happiness getting you down?
Don’t fret — get smart and think about you instead!
Virtually all of the women in my study for my books said they had trouble “turning down the background noise” about what statistics and ... Views: 18
Do you know that old negative emotional baggage is something you don't have to carry on your back for the rest of your life? Do you know it's rooted in subconsciously stored negative memories from the past that can be permanently deleted much like an outdated computer file?
Do you know this ... Views: 26
Do you know that early experiences of abandonment behave like a curse worse than death when one is trying to establish a successful and healthy relationship in their adult life? Do you know that the negative memories of abandonment remain stored deep in the subconscious mind and from there ... Views: 19
Do you know that many people sabotage their relationships because of a fear of commitment, fear of intimacy, fear of being rejected or abandoned, feelings of inadequacy, worthlessness, and neediness just to name a few?
Do you know all this negativity is generated by old emotional baggage ... Views: 26
Lack or breakdown of communication is the primary reasons marriages fail. Couples have to learn to talk and listen to each other if they desire a solid marriage.
Communication, most especially verbal is what makes us different from other animals and that is the foundation of all human ... Views: 20
Dear Dr. Romance:My partner whom I have been in a relationship with for the past year has changed and let me down twice. We were first friends for several years & became a couple for the last year. We both fell in love instantly and desire to live together to build towards a good ... Views: 30
Do you know that narcissism involves an inordinate fascination with the self; excessive self-love, vanity, self absorption, self-centeredness, smugness and egocentrism? Do you also know that it is considered to be a normal condition of the infantile level of personality development?
Do you ... Views: 31
Do you know that the majority of individuals feel needy inside? Do you know that neediness makes them feel weak, inadequate, deficient, defective, vulnerable, manipulative, unattractive, depletes their self confidence, self esteem self worth, personal integrity, and sabotages their ability to ... Views: 32
The narcissist constructs a narrative of his life that is partly confabulated and whose purpose is to buttress, demonstrate, and prove the veracity of the fantastically grandiose and often impossible claims made by the False Self. This narrative allocates roles to significant others in the ... Views: 53
In the children’s book When Sophie Gets Angry – Really, Really Angry, the little girl, Sophie, gets so angry she runs out into the woods and climbs up a tree. After a very short time, she is calm and returns home to her family.
It is no wonder that Sophie got so angry. A young ... Views: 13
I became a mother when I was seven years old. An all consuming love happened in an instant, as it does for some new mothers, when my angelic brother, just having been adopted, was brought home at seven days old. When I first saw him, gorgeous as a crescent moon, with blond tiny ringlets, I was ... Views: 19
Are you one of those individuals who craves to have friends around you all or most of the time? If so have you ever wondered what motivates your craving? Have you ever wondered how discriminating you are when it comes to the types of people you choose to invite into your life and into your ... Views: 35
Have you ever noticed how often you repeat the same negative patterns of behavior, find yourself attracting partners with the same negative qualities as in your past relationships, making the same kinds of mistakes or bad judgments, and continue to repeat the same self sabotaging habits? Have ... Views: 51
Do you know that your subconscious mind has a "mind" of its own that takes charge of your freewill leaving you enslaved to choices that are not entirely beneficial to you?
Do you know this is the result of a pre-programmed state generated by early memories that automatically condition you to ... Views: 33
It’s not uncommon to hear that women want to settle down and that men want to ‘play the field’. And based on this, women want to be in a relationship and men are not bothered about being in one.
This is how men and women are generally portrayed and in some cases, this is going to be true. ... Views: 50
Dr. Romance writes: A lighthearted approach to serious matters often is the most productive one. Imagine what your days would be like if you focused on having fun and making yourself and your partner laugh. Fun is also good for your health: Telling your partner the cute thing your kid said (or ... Views: 55
We are all in a time of high stress, and
national disasters often bring up fear. If these fears are not
dealt with, they can lead to acting out behavior,
such as drinking too much or creating relationship, work or money
problems as a distraction. To avoid ... Views: 29
Dear Dr. Romance:
My last romantic relationship (that I thought was mutual) ended because she said one day out of the blue, "I don't love you any more." I think she never really did, but rather I was her crutch after her lastbreakup. I loved her wholly, with all my ... Views: 40
Do you know that the fear of abandonment is a key factor in the demise of many relationships? Do you know that it can make individuals insecure, jealous, controlling, manipulative, needy, smothering, and that all of these inevitably cause the very thing they fear, abandonment? Do you know that ... Views: 37
Have you ever had the experience where you find yourself losing your identity or the sense of yourself once you get into a relationship? If you're not sure what I'm talking about here let me elaborate.
You start out having perspectives, preferences, opinions, desires and attitudes that you ... Views: 22
Self confidence is the ability to always know one's inner truth, value it, trust it, and live it joyfully, peacefully and with an inner knowing that one is worthy of it. Does this describe you? If not then whose life are you living? Certainly not yours! To get back on track I help you understand ... Views: 24
When one experiences pain and it is not possible for them to face the pain that they’re experiencing, they’re going to end up using a number of defence mechanisms. This could be due to how traumatising the experience is or because it would be too much for them to face how they feel.
A ... Views: 34
Just because one has the need to experience something, it doesn’t always mean that this need will be fulfilled. And this is something that can be said when it comes to ones need to connect to another person.
For some people, intimacy is going to be something that they have always ... Views: 33
Three Questions to Answer in Measuring the Success of Your Relationship
“Don't marry the person you think you can live with; marry only the individual you think you can't live without.” ~James Dobson.
A writing colleague and dear friend of mine who is ... Views: 45
Discover why any kind of engaging when someone is angry is a waste of energy.
"Rage can…shut off the hippocampus [linked to memory], and people with out-of-control anger may not be lying when they say they don't recall what they said or did in that altered state of ... Views: 26
Do you allow your natural kindness to shine forth?
"Kindness is an inner desire that makes us want to do good things even if we do not get anything in return. It is the joy of our life to do them. When we do good things from this inner desire, there is kindness in everything we ... Views: 21