There is nothing quite as agonizing as waiting. We wait for people. We wait for reports and news. We wait to get to where we want to go. Waiting slows us down and it also speeds us up. It speeds us up in that we get restless, anxious and agitated. We might become even more motivated and determined to see what we long for that we keep ourselves busy. Waiting slows us down because we can’t make things go any faster than they are already going. We have no other choice but to wait. We might even impede our progress if we do something prematurely. It would be like taking a cake out of the oven before it is finished baking. It simply isn’t ready yet. We find that in many ways waiting cannot be avoided.
Waiting can certainly be a tremendous challenge. The more eager and impatient we are, the more difficult it becomes. Some of us endure times of waiting with greater patience than others. And that is what it is—enduring. What do we endure when we wait? We might endure dealing with someone else’s timetable or their mistakes. We might have to endure feeling uncertain, fearful or insecure. Times of waiting force us into the discomfort of having to endure what we would much rather avoid. Having to endure stretches us to grow, and as a result it develops our character. If we allow it to teach us, we can learn many things. We can learn that we cannot always get our way and we can learn to be okay with it. We can learn that some things are worth waiting for. We can learn to respect others’ pace and not rush them. We can learn to trust that everything will work out one way or another. We can discover that our time doesn’t have to be wasted and that our restless energies can be redirected into something good and productive.
How we wait determines how we grow and who we become. If waiting were a test, how often would you pass? The next time you are challenged to face a time of waiting ask yourself, How is this stretching me to grow? Also ask yourself, What is the hurry? We often create our own sense of urgency. We create our own stress as we rush in circles in our minds like a dog chasing its tail. We get nowhere fast. Before we know it we end up frustrated and we don’t feel we’ve come any closer than we were before.
What will it take for us to slow down and wait patiently? Maybe we need to get ourselves distracted for a little while. Time goes by very slowly if we just stare at the clock. Maybe we need to allow the time of waiting to strengthen us to have more self-control. We can begin to resist what we once couldn’t. Maybe we can begin to face our fears and insecurities and deal with them. And maybe we can begin to enjoy the present moment. We can discover something right here and right now that we could easily have missed before. When you can make your times of waiting times of growing, enjoying, and living for today—what is the hurry?
So what is the big hurry anyway? Why not wait when you can make your times of waiting times of growing, enjoying, and living for today.
Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a psychotherapist, author, teacher, and musician. She is the cofounder of www.NewDayCounseling.org and www.BeHappyforLife.net where you can find hundreds of free resources, online workshops, video presentations, insights, and inspiration to empower people to develop a lifestyle of happiness and love.