When I decided to leave the Midwest and return to my home state of Oregon I was heart broke and expecting my oldest daughter. My mother insisted that I come home.

Even at twenty one I let her make many decisions for me, especially regarding the relationship between my daughter and her father. I didn't have any experience or anyone else to go to (or so I thought). Mom convinced me to exclude my daughter's father from her life. She said that he would influence her, take her away and I might never see her again as he lived several states away. I submitted to her reasoning, telling myself that she made sense.

Interesting thing, several years later I realized my mother was looking thru the lens of her pain and unfinished business while directing my life.

My mother's older children (my siblings) were very young when their father took them to live several states away and she saw very little of them for a number of years. Yes, she was right; their father had indeed influenced them. It was very painful for all.

Her intentions weren't malicious; they were however projected onto me and my daughter.

Recently I had a conversation with a client who is going thru divorce. She was describing many things occurring - she was in a state of overwhelm. Having tried everything she was at her wits end.

Listening, I picked up on 'chaos'. My intuition kicked in - it felt all too familiar.

She was stuck smack-dabbed. In her early years, the oldest of several siblings and not ever knowing her bio-father, didn't feel her mother (who'd been divorced more than once) had protected her from the different step-father's disciplines.

Unlike her mother, my client says she has made it a point to "stick up" for her children.

She has unknowingly projected her unresolved pain from earlier years onto her children. While "sticking up" for her children my client interrupted and denied her husband of disciplining their children.

Her intent hasn't been malicious (nor was her mother's).

The pendulum swings from one extreme to the other.

The mission in all of the examples was to protect their children.

Here lies the benefit of having someone who is trained and objective to facilitate the healing.

I have openings for new clients, perhaps I can assist you with finding solutions to your situation, maybe offer you suggestions with reducing and or managing the chaos in your life.

This week, I encourage you to ask yourself, "What can I do to experience myself free of pain, chaos and be more peaceful?"

To your bliss!

"The longer you remain in the improved feelings of relief, the more those better-feeling thoughts will attract other better-feeling thoughts, until, in time, you will be in alignment with your own desire." Excerpt from "The Astonishing Power of Emotions" - Ester and Jerry Hicks


"Ponderings" © Copyrighted 1998 - 2007 by Glenda Gibbs. Feel free to share. The content may be forwarded in full, with copyright/contact/creation information intact.

I offer 30 minute complimentary calls. I can help you to experience clarity and solutions. Call today. 509.585.9683

email: glenda@glendagibbs.com
phone: 509.585.9683
web: http://glendagibbs.com

Happy thoughts ... make a great day!

Author's Bio: 

For the last twenty years, Glenda Gibbs has helped individuals and groups of people learn how to embrace conflict and breakthrough what seemed impossible to find collaboration, peace of mind, and achieve their goals. She's helped thousands of people discover how to make their unique contributions in the world.

Glenda teaches from a wealth of experience, both personal and professional. She assists those who want more out life and are ready to re-connect with their essence. Glenda can be reached at www.glendagibbs.com.