What Are The Simple Things Matter In Love and Relationships?

By Dr. Charles D. Schmitz and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
"the marriage doctors"

Authors of the INDIE Book Awards Gold Medal Winner for Best Relationship Book of 2008
Golden Anniversaries: The Seven Secrets of Successful Marriage

Available at GoldenAnniversaries.com, Amazon.com, BarnesandNoble.com, and at Bookstores

Recently we wrote an article entitled, Simple Things Matter In Love and Relationships. In that article we reported that love and successful marriage is based on an accumulation of the “simple things.”

After more than 25 years of research on successful love and relationships we can state unequivocally, if you want your marriage or your relationship to succeed you have to do the simple things each and every day.

People have been asking us since that article came out, "What are the simple things that make love survive and thrive over a lifetime together?"

Here is a list of 50 examples of simple things that matter. This list should get you started.

1. Take long walks together.
2. Snuggle in the morning before you get out of bed.
3. Recognize kindness with a thank you.
4. Call when you are going to be late.
5. Share a good bottle of wine while watching a sunset.
6. Be generous with your time for each other.
7. Compliment your lover about something she did today that made her special.
8. Hold hands often.
9. Bring home flowers for him when it is not a special occasion.
10. Leave a sticky note on your lover’s wallet or purse telling her to come home safely to you because you love her.
11. Ask him about his dreams and his dreams for your future together.
12. Open doors for each other.
13. Take a bike ride together, bringing a picnic lunch for a secluded spot along the way.
14. Walk your dog together.
15. Fix your lover breakfast in bed for no special reason.
16. Say “I love you” several times during each day.
17. Treat your lover with courtesy at all times.
18. Help clean off the table and do the dishes after dinner.
19. Compliment your lover’s cooking.
20. Tell him one reason why he means so much to you.
21. Take her to her favorite restaurant in the middle of the week.
22. Touch your mate 100 times a day.
23. Surprise your wife by bringing her lunch when she least expects it.
24. Prepare meals together as often as you can.
25. Spend an evening listening to music and making a CD of your favorite songs together.
26. Never let things get stale. Upend expectancies and delight your lover.
27. Always point out the positive attributes of your lover, both at home and in public.
28. Give your husband a massage or a back rub.
29. Look directly into your lover’s eye when you are having a conversation.
30. Be your lover’s best cheerleader for their accomplishments.
31. Plan a bubble bath together and see where it leads.
32. Go dancing together.
33. Talk about everything. No topic is too small or too big. There are no sacred cows.
34. Always demonstrate respect for each other in your words and in your actions.
35. Schedule your annual physicals on the same day.
36. Plan a week of healthy meals together with foods that you both enjoy.
37. Write your husband a love letter and leave it for him to find in his underwear drawer.
38. Sit down and go over the finances together before you pay the bills for the month.
39. Take your lover to a movie, putting your arm around them like you used to when you were dating.
40. Go for a boat ride, car ride or train ride that isn’t planned and doesn’t have an itinerary.
41. Write personal Valentine’s Day cards.
42. Turn off the television and talk to each other.
43. Sing a song together and to each other.
44. Go to Disneyland—just the two of you.
45. Plant flowers together.
46. Share a tuna melt.
47. Kiss each other passionately.
48. Go to the zoo together.
49. Share a shower.
50. Sit in your porch swing and gaze at the stars.

You see, the simple things do matter. Change your relationship and your life in positive ways by doing the simple things. Start today.

Love Well!

Author's Bio: 

Now you can order the Doctors' award winning book, Golden Anniversaries: The Seven Secrets of Successful Marriage at Amazon.com or BarnesandNoble.com or from their website with FREE DVDs. With 26 years of research experience on successful marriage and their own 42-year marriage, Drs. Charles and Elizabeth Schmitz know what makes marriage work. From their hundreds of interviews with happily married couples, representing 15,000 years of marriage, they've discovered the seven pervasive characteristics present in all successful marriages. Their book exposes the secrets for success through these poignant, real life stories.

Get started with “the marriage doctors” by taking their Marriage Quiz or asking them a question at Ask The Marriage Doctors or downloading their FREE eBook at Salad Recipes For Love and Health.

During their distinguished careers the Doctors have received some 65 local, state, and national awards; published nearly 350 articles and manuscripts; delivered over 1000 speeches, workshops and public presentations; traveled throughout the world; and appeared on radio and television and in the print media. Dr. Charles D. Schmitz is Dean and Professor of Family and Counseling Therapy at the University of Missouri in St. Louis and Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz is President of Successful Marriage Reflections, LLC.

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