Skip to content
Article

Are You an Optimist or a Pessimist?

Written by Margaret Paul, Ph.D.

Topic: Relationship AdvicePublished Recently added
No ratings yet6,124 viewsSign in to rate
"I am an optimist. It does not seem too much use being anything else." - Winston Churchill When you notice your thoughts, which kind of thoughts predominate? Do you find yourself often thinking pessimistic thoughts such as:
  • I'll never get where I want to go. I'm a loser.
  • I'm not smart enough to achieve what I want to achieve.
  • God is there for others but not for me.
  • I'm going to end up losing what I have.
  • The world is very unsafe so I have to always be vigilant.
  • Why reach out to others? No one really likes me.
  • Why put forth effort? There is no point since I don't have the talent or ability to success.
  • Some people just have good luck, but I don't.
  • Things are going too well. I just know that something bad is going to happen.
  • Life is too much for me to handle.
  • I'm going to end up alone.
  • Life for me will always be a disaster.
  • There is no point in eating well or exercising - my genetics are against me.
  • I'm not emotionally or physically healthy, and this is just the way it is. There is nothing I can do about it.
  • I don't deserve to be happy.
  • I don't deserve to be loved.
And so on... Or, do you find yourself often thinking optimistic thoughts such as:
  • If I work hard enough and stay focused, I will get where I want to go.
  • My intelligence and abilities increase with learning.
  • No one ever succeeds without a lot of effort, and I can put in as much effort as anyone who has ever succeeded.
  • If I stay tuned into and trust my own inner knowing, I can feel safe.
  • I am a good and kind person so of course people like me.
  • It is not luck that causes people to succeed, but belief in themselves.
  • When bad things happen, these are opportunities for learning and growth.
  • Life's challenges present me with incredible learning opportunities.
  • When I am ready for partnership, someone will show up.
  • Regardless of how physically or emotionally unhealthy my parents were, I can make choices that result in physical and emotional health.
  • Everyone deserves to be happy, including me.
  • Everyone deserves to be loved, and everyone is loved by God.
You Get to Choose! Do you realize that you have free will, which means that you get to choose how you want to think? You get to choose whether you want to be an optimist or a pessimist, and which one you choose determines your feelings and actions. When you look at the pessimist list, can you see that thinking these kinds of thoughts create depression, procrastination, and continued failure? Can you see when you look at the optimist list how thinking these thoughts create motivation, loving action, and ultimate success in work and life?nnYou Are Not a Victim! Instead of seeing yourself as a victim of circumstances, of your past, of your parents, of events or of luck, why not start to monitor your thoughts and consciously change them from negative to positive? You will likely discover that changing your thoughts changes your feelings and actions, as well as outcomes. You have everything to gain and nothing to lose by experimenting with changing your thoughts!

Article author

About the Author

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is a best-selling author of 8 books and co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding® healing process. Are you are ready to heal your pain and discover your joy? Learn Inner Bonding now! Click here for a FREE Inner Bonding Course, and visit our website at www.innerbonding.com for more articles and help. Phone Sessions Available. Join the thousands we have already helped and visit us now! Additional Resources covering Love can be found at: Website Directory for Love Articles on Love Products for Love Discussion Board Margaret Paul, the Official Guide to Love

Further reading

Further Reading

3 total

Article

The early development of avoidant attachment creates a coping mechanism that forms in childhood. Disconnected parent-child interactions typically trigger this condition. People who develop this attachment style learn to depend on their resources. They avoid deep emotional connections. People with this attachment style want intimacy, yet they remain afraid of becoming dependent on others. Understanding Avoidant Attachment Among the four primary attachment styles, avoidant atta

February 6, 2025

Article

The idea of making yourself more desirable by making yourself less available doesn't make a lot of sense when you think about it. After all, Juliet would have plunged a premature dagger into the heart of her romance with Romeo if she hid in her room rather than go out on her balcony. The end of Sleepless in Seattle shifts from "awww" to "aw, no" if one of the two main characters skips the trip to the Empire State Building. As these examples from fiction show, making yourself

August 16, 2024

Article

Whеn it comеs to attraction, actions oftеn spеak loudеr than words. Womеn havе a uniquе ability to captivatе and еnticе mеn without uttеring a singlе syllablе. Whеthеr it's a subtlе glancе or a playful touch, thеsе nonvеrbal cuеs can crеatе an undеniablе chеmistry that words alonе could nеvеr convеy. In this articlе, wе'll еxplorе fivе unspokеn movеs that womеn usе to drivе mеn wild, tapping into thе powеr of body languagе, еyе

August 10, 2024