It could be said that comparing oneself with another is a natural part of living in the modern day world. And it is also true that this doesn’t necessarily have to be something that is negative or disempowering.

There are of course certain comparisons that can be made, without ones wellbeing being affected. One can compare themselves with others as a way to improve on what they do and as inspiration. They also allow one to make sense of the world and are vital for survival.

This is something that is likely to become a problem when one feels less than another or that they are missing something for instance.

The Ego Mind And The Heart

And due to the ego mind seeing in polarities, it is not much of a surprise to see how much of our world is based on comparison. This can also lead to a competitive outlook.

On the other hand, the heart is all about oneness and does not seek to compare one thing with another. Everything just is and comparison doesn’t come into it. However, the world that we live in is generally a result of the mind and not the heart; so comparison is the norm.

From The Beginning

And from the moment one is born, the comparing begins. This could be with ones siblings, other children or their caregivers. Up next is typically the learning environment, so this is usually: school, college and university.

When it comes to these environments, one is often put into a class and this is usually based on how clever they are. The challenge here is that this is based on one measuring up to something that has been created by other human beings.

This means that it is subjective and therefore not the truth. And although this is the case, if one doesn’t match up to these requirements they can often go through their whole life with a sense of inferiority or failure.

The Diamond Within

What one brings to the world is largely ignored through this way of teaching. And what right does anyone have when it comes to defining if someone is clever or not? We all have something unique to offer and this won’t always be revealed through following external rules or expectations.

A personal Journey

Even though we are all human beings and are all on the same planet; we are all on a personal journey. Our paths will cross with some people more than others and yet each experience that we have is subjective.

And this means that the challenges that one person may have, can be completely different to the challenges that another person may have. These are often challenges that can’t be recognised through looking at another, but they may be partly felt through empathising with them.

Honouring Ones Path

Through comparing oneself with others, it may appear that the challenges that one is facing are more difficult than those of others or they may seem easier. However, this is all matter of perspective.

And in order to come to a more balanced and accurate perspective; one needs to look at where they have come from and the challenges that they have overcome. This is where a true sense of achievement will be gained.


It is important to monitor the mind and to observe its tendency to see life in a way that is either black or white. Through looking at life this way, it can create all kinds of unnecessary dramas.

While others can inspire us and be examples of what is possible, they can never be used as a true reflection of how well we are or are not doing.

And one of the reasons for this is that no one has ever walked in our shoes and neither can we ever walk in another’s shoes.

Author's Bio: 

My name is Oliver J R Cooper and I have been on a journey of self awareness for over nine years and for many years prior to that I had a natural curiosity.

For over two years, I have been writing articles. These cover psychology and communication. This has also lead to poetry.

One of my intentions is to be a catalyst to others, as other people have been and continue to be to me. As well as writing articles and creating poetry, I also offer personal coaching. To find out more go to -

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