Recently, a porn star committed suicide, and this was said to be due to the abuse that she received online. Based on this, it could be said that the people who abused her online were responsible for her death.

The Trolls

This is then an example of what can happen when someone is treated badly on social media. What this shows is that the saying, ‘sticks and stone may break my bones, but words will never hurt me‘, is not completely true.

At the same time, if someone is already in a bad way, it is not going to take a lot of effort to wear them down. Apparently, the porn star who killed herself was not in a good way to begin with, and this was said to be the result of how she was treated as a child.

One Outlook

For some people, this is not going to come as a surprise: if anything, it will match up with what they already believe about porn stars. As far as they are concerned, all of the men and women who work in this industry will have issues.

This is then going to be no different to finding out that someone who has an impressive physique used to be overweight, for instance. What their body used to look like is what gave them the desire to completely transform themselves.

The Catalyst

How they experienced life at one point in time had a powerful effect on them, and this is what caused them to do the complete opposite. However, when it relates to a porn star, it is not as if they are doing something radically different.

If they were abused as a child, it could be said that their modern day life is, in many ways, simply a continuation of what happened to them as a child. But while this will make perfect sense of some people, there will be others who can’t get their head around it.

One Level

Yet, even if someone doesn’t find this hard to believe, it doesn’t mean that they will have a lot to say about why it takes place. For example, they could just say that these women are “damaged”.

And, if a woman was abused as a child, there is a strong chance that she is damaged. Even so, what this doesn’t explain is why what happened to this woman as a child caused her to end up in this type of profession.

Another Response

On the other hand, there are bound to be other people who can’t get their head around why a woman would end up in this position. If someone has this outlook, they could say that it’s the same as being beaten up in one neighbourhood and going back to the same neighbourhood, not once, but on a regular basis,

They might wonder if a person like this is out of touch with their survival instincts, with this being seen as the reason why experience life in this way. Therefore, instead of doing what they can to protect themselves, they do what they can to harm themselves.

The Present Day Experience

Now, there is going to be how a porn star is treated when she is working and then there is going to be what she puts up with in her day-to-day life. When she is at work, she could be exploited in a number of different ways.

Her personal relationships might not be any different, either, and she may have also been with a number of abusive men. If this is the case, just about every area of her life is going to have a negative effect on her mental, emotional, and physical health.

One Answer

One way of looking at this would be to say that the reason why a woman would experience life in this way is because it is what feels safe at a deeper level. Consciously, this is likely to be the last thing that she wants to experience, but this is going to be exactly what another part of her wants to experience.

The type of abuse that she experienced during the beginning of her life is likely to be what set her up to feel comfortable with abuse. What took place at this time in her life would have been associated as what was familiar, and what was familiar would have ended up being classed as what is safe.

A Closer Look

What this emphasises is how much of an effect this time in someone’s life has on their later years. It doesn’t end there, though, as being treated in this way would have also caused her to feel completely worthless.

How she was treated would have been seen as a reflection of her value as a person, as opposed to the fact that her abuser was the one with the problem. This is typically something that takes place out of the need to survive, as if a child was to face up to the fact that their abuser was the one at fault it would have been too much for them to handle at this age; whereas blaming themselves would have stopped them from feeling completely powerless.

A Loss of Self

And through being treated in this way, there is a strong chance that she ended up developing a false-self in the process. Her true-self would have been seen as flawed and as something that she had to hide from others.

This may mean that she is no longer in touch with her true needs and feelings, thereby causing her to play a role. Thus, the image that she presents to the world could be nothing more than a mask.

Repetition Compulsion

Another way of looking at this would be to say that the reason her adult years are very similar to what her childhood years were like is due to her unconscious need to resolve what took place all those years ago. This part of her will believe that she can remedy what took place by having the same experience but with a different outcome.

Ultimately, this is highly unlikely to take place, and this is why this is something that can create so much suffering. What really needs to happen is for the woman to see what is taking place and then to work though this pain.


Alternatively, she could work through this pain and, as this happens, she will gradually let go of the need to recreate the past. Yet, regardless of what is going on for her, it is going to be vital for her to reach out for external support, and this can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

If a woman was abused as a child, it is unlikely that she will be able to move on overnight – it could take quite some time. This is why she will need to be patient, persistent, and to surround herself with the right people.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand five hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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