How To Avoid Problems In Marriage: Husband And Wife Relationship Problems
Too often people get carried away being too comfortable in their marriage that they fail to see when their marriage is having problems. It starts out as little but over time some common problems build up in the marriage that will lead to something much bigger and then they begin running from pillar to post to look for solutions to save their marriage.
Once in a while it is necessary to do checks and identify common marriage problems in your relationship and stop it in its tracks. The truth is, you personally have the power in your hands to influence and control the course of your marriage. By acting the way you want to feel rather than reacting to your situation, you can stop the deterioration and save your marriage by setting it on the path to healing and recovery.
When you don't put enough effort into your marriage, it will die. Marriage just like your favorite plants will either grow or weaken depending on how you tend to it. If you fertilize it, water it, and notice when it is unhealthy, it will thrive. If you leave it to grow on its own, without any attention, it will wither and die.
One of the most common marriage problems a couple have is they do not love each other anymore. Truth be told, you cannot maintain feelings of love or affection unless you continuously act in a loving way towards your spouse. This involves listening to your husband or wife, complimenting and verbally showing appreciation even for the little things.
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Does any of these common marriage problems affect your marriage? Most of us think that we're easy people to love. Love is an action, and unless you act it out, I am afraid your marriage is heading for the rocks. You may not have noticed it, but you may be resisting being loved without even knowing.
Are you uncomfortable giving and receiving love acts? Do you shrug away from hugs or do not like the thought of being kissed in public? When your spouse initiates a hug or wants to kiss you and you shy away from it, before long he or she would not make any more attempts and you begin to grow apart. Did you know that touching or kissing is part of being intimate? For intimacy to grow, you both must be comfortable touching and loving one another--both giving love and receiving it.
Do you blame your spouse for your unhappiness? Do you feel your marriage is not living up to your expectations? Do you find yourself pointing fingers to your spouse for doing this and that and making you unhappy? You are responsible for your own happiness and if your marriage is not what you expected it to be then the hard truth is that you also had a part to play in it. So change your behavior and see if there is a dramatic change in your relationship with your spouse
Do you do things to annoy your spouse? I know he or she won't like it but I will do it anyway to get on their last nerves? Does this sound like you? What goes around comes around and that is probably why you are not happy anyway. The things you do always come back to you either directly or indirectly. Show love and you will receive love.
Do you criticize and put down your spouse? Do you put down your spouse by verbally abusing them?Are you one of those who always finds a fault with what your partner does? No you did not put this in the right place. No you should not have done it like that. Why did you not ask me before you spent the money. People do not like to be criticized. If your spouse does not feel comfortable coming to you who is the one person they should come to when they are in trouble for fear of being put down or criticized then you may need to check your behavior and play down on the criticism. It may just be hurting your marriage and you will only see this in the long run.
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Do you have respect for your spouse? There is still a strong argument about which is more important - respect or Love. I say, they compliment each other. Have you ever noticed how you find it easy to like people who look up to you? If you show your spouse respect you will receive love. Its that simple.
Do you always want to be right? Do you want to have the last word at every argument? Do you let pride get in the way? Do you have temper tantrums when you do not get your way? This is another common problem in many marriages and this leads to frustration and resentment. Over time the affected spouse will want to opt out because there is no winning with you.
Are you a negative person? Do you always see the negative side of things? Do you take everything your partner does or says personally? Do you believe that nothing good can come out of your spouse? You do not like change and always try to resist growth at any cost. The only constant thing in life is change and if you refuse to adjust for the sake of your marriage, it will only be a matter of time before you hear those life changing words from your spouse 'I want out'.
Do you have a 3-man relationship? Do you let others get between you and your spouse. Do believe others more than your spouse? Do you need a third opinion after seeking out your spouse's advice? When you let a third party (friends or family) into your marriage it creates a divide between you and your spouse and you grow apart.
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It can be quite sad to see a marriage fall apart in front of your eyes. It can be very heart wrenching and devastating if it is your marriage and you are trying your best to keep the marriage together.
If you fit in this category, I can understand your feelings as I have been in a similar situation not too long ago. My wife did not seem very interested in me anymore and despite trying all I could do to save it, everything seemed fruitless. I was in despair and it was quite stressful when nothing seemed to work.
I believe a lot of spouses feel desperate because "they have tried everything and nothing works". I know the feeling very well. It looked like I had tried to do everything to save my marriage but wasn't able to make an inch of a progress (I even felt I made things worse!). But, as you would infer, this is not the end of my story. In fact, quite the opposite!
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Luckily for me, not only was I able to repair the damage done to our relationship; it has actually been much better than it was previously! I can now say with complete confidence that any marriage can be saved as long as the right effort is being made. I believe that every marriage should be healthy and long lasting as it can only benefit our society.
What I did to help my marriage was something called "playing the inaccessible". This somewhat speaks for itself as you play the inaccessible person to your husband or wife. If you don't think that this works then do you think that begging on your knees would help your situation? Of course not! In fact, that works against your situation. People don't want things they is easily within their grasp - quite the opposite, in fact.
I get people telling me that it sounds a lot easier than done. Have some faith in yourself! Because if you say you will fail before even trying you have definitely failed. And what I am telling you to do is not hard in the slightest - the laws that the universe follows are here to stay for good. What laws am I talking about? Well for starters, people will always want what they can't get. Use this to your benefit and show your spouse that you are not desolate but independent and strong willed. If I can do it, you certainly can!
Are you tired of living in a relationship in which you feel neglected? Many married people find themselves feeling alone and rejected by their spouse. If you feel taken for granted, there's a way to change that now.
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In the hustle and bustle of everyday life it is easy to find yourself neglecting your relationship. When you find yourself wondering where the romance went, then it is time to stop and take a second look at how you are spending your time. Life gets hectic, but your love life doesn't have to suffer. There are ways to chisel out time for each other.
Instead of continually pressing the snooze button in the morning, wake up when the alarm goes off. Simple things like having coffee with your partner before heading off to work can help reignite intimacy. If you don't have to work late, don't! Plan a late dinner and don't take phone calls or check emails during that time together. Simple things like unplugging can make a simple dinner a very romantic act. It is all about taking proactive steps to show your partner you want that special time together.
If you have some vacation time coming up, make your plans together as a couple. Take into account that even two busy people must be dedicated to the romance in a relationship. By going into the planning together, you ensure you both have the same goal. Keep each other in the loop and don't hesitate to be honest about what you both are hoping to achieve. Maybe you just need a break from the real world, or maybe its more serious and what you need is to rekindle the flame.
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Never use work as an excuse to ignore your relationship. Whether you just have twenty minutes in the morning to spend together or you are able to have several days, it really does take time and work to keep your love relationship alive. Every minute together counts. Don't waste the time you do have. Try to sync your days off so they can be spent with each other. Make an extra effort to schedule time for romance. It could save your relationship.
It is easy to lose time for each other with hectic jobs, kids and the fast pace of life itself. It's important to remember you cannot take these things with you when your life comes to an end. You can only take the love and good thoughts you have had with your loved ones. While it might seem important to check your email at the time, it could be much more important to spend that special time with your spouse.
Ask yourself what you are putting before your relationship? Do you think destructive emotions are at the heart of this thinking? What are you really telling yourself? It doesn't hurt to check on our behavior and see why we are acting a certain way...
Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.
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When you're having problems in your marriage and need someone to talk to, where should you go for help? Are you going to get the help you need by complaining to your best friend about the things your spouse does or asking your mother for advice? Probably not, because no matter how caring and concerned these people might be, they just don't have the training and skills it's going to take to help you divert your marriage onto a better path. A marriage or couples counselor isn't going to do you any good, either, because they are more into exploring your emotions than they are finding answers. What you need is a marriage expert who has the training to teach you what you need to know.
So what should you look for in a marriage coach? Saving your marriage may sound like a hopeless task, because your spouse just doesn't want to cooperate and refuses to do any kind of couples counseling. With the right expert, you can work on saving your marriage even without your spouse's participation. Of course, if your spouse is willing to work with you, that's great, too. You can find out answers to the most trying questions, such as "How do I know when my marriage is really over?" and "Why do cheating spouses cheat?" which is the first step in trying to figure out if it's possible to put a marriage back together.
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Once you've identified the basic flaws within the marriage that are causing the rift, your marriage coach will guide you to information that addresses the exact subject. All of this can be accomplished during a thirty minute free consultation. Find out why your spouse is saying that he or she doesn't love you any more and why they want a divorce, gain new perspective on your marital situation, and discover what happened in your marriage that led you to this point. You have to be able to understand the situation clearly before you can determine how to move on.
Doesn't this sound like a much better way of revitalizing your marriage than to have someone who has already gone through four divorces in their own life ask you, "How are you feeling about things right now?" Instead of this type of counseling, you want an active marriage expert who'll give you the information you need to succeed.
Now Listen Carefully-
Take 2 minutes to visit the next page and you'll discover a stunning trick which will make your spouse love you for the rest of their lives even if they are this close to walking out the door. Yes, you can indeed save your marriage no matter how hopeless the situation seems. Take the right step now and live to enjoy a blissful marriage. I strongly urge you to visit the next page- Click Here
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Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.
Do you have a unique situation? Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: RelationshipTalkForum.com
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