How To Live A Happy Married Life: How To Be Happy In A Bad Marriage

Looking for the secret of how to have a happy marriage?

That's a question that you should be extremely proud to be asking. So many people go through their lives in a marriage that either just royally stinks, or one that is just humdrum and boring. Humdrum and boring is usually what leads to infidelity and cheating, or just total resentment between spouses.

So feel proud of yourself for looking for looking for the answer to a happy marriage.

Not long ago I was asking the same question very often. I would wonder if there was even such a thing. Coming from a family of divorced parents, I married almost under the mindset that I would eventually end up divorced once my marriage had run its course.

Is that terrible or what.

It actually probably had a lot to do with the tone that it set in my marriage, making it not a very happy marriage at all for a lot of years. My marriage was a mess and I had a lot to learn about how to make it work.

One of the problems I had though was looking for that one magic bullet that would fix my marriage. Doing this led to a lot of heartache and disappointment. It's sort of like falling for every get rich quick scheme over and over again. When you look for the easy and quick way out you're usually severely disappointed.

When you're disappointed then your marriage seems almost worse and so the cycle continues, and so that's no way to have a happy marriage one bit.

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Here's what I Learned About How to Have a Happy Marriage

The thing that I learned about having a happy and successful marriage is that it's more of a journey rather than an end result, and the quicker you learn (yes learn) to enjoy that journey, the quicker you'll find happiness in your marriage.

You see, there are a lot of key things that make a marriage happy and successful. Of course we all hear the word communication all the time, and that's true, but what we don't hear are the preludes to good communication like understanding, and perception of your spouse.

And then there are getting through the things that affect almost every marriage such as direction, and power struggles. It's a lot.

The main thing to remember always is that your marriage doesn't need to be perfect. Your marriage doesn't need to be necessarily fixed. But it does need to constantly grow and consistently improve. Otherwise, it's doomed for failure at all costs.

Even though failure may not result in divorce, it may end up in a lifetime of shared unhappiness.

That's the secret to how to have a happy marriage.

My marriage wasn't only unhappy, it was on it's way to the ultimate failure. It was heading for the ultimate disaster because I didn't learn some very important things about marriage to begin with. Once I did learn them I was kicking myself for not learning them sooner.

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Anyone who is married knows that maintaining a relationship be be very difficult at times. Unfortunately for many couples, instead of working through their problems they turn to divorce instead. I say that this is unfortunate because working through marital problems can be a lot simpler than most people realize. This is why I'm going to lay out how you can save your marriage from divorce in 3 easy steps.

1. Communicate

The first step towards resolving any relationship issues is to communicate. I know it seems obvious, but so many couples seem to think that ignoring problems is going to make them go away. This couldn't be farther from the truth, and this type of attitude is a surefire way to see your marriage end in divorce. You must be willing to talk with your spouse about anything in your relationship that is bothering you, and be willing to listen when they come to you with a problem.

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2. Compromise

In any relationship you must be willing to compromise on some things. You simply can't have it your way all the time, and neither can your partner. You need to learn to work with your husband or wife to find a middle ground which you are both happy with. This can be hard for many people to do, which is why I highly recommend you look into a guide to saving your marriage which can be found online and will teach you how to deal with things such as compromise in a way that will leave both you and your spouse happy.

3. Commit

The single most important aspect of any healthy marriage is commitment. Your marriage vows probably included something along the lines of "for better or for worse" and you need to be ready to stand by those vows you made with your spouse. It takes a lot of work to keep your relationship healthy, but if you're willing to put in that work it will be well worth it. A lifelong marriage is one of the greatest things you can experience in your life, so don't give up on it easily.

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1. Money: Money can be a blessing to a family but it can also be an agent of destabilisation, hence, we must handle it wisely. Be open to each other about your income, plan together, spend together, never allow money to separate you. Selfishness, stinginess, unfaithfulness, lying, deceit should not be allowed in your marriage, they give room for the enemy to come into the home. Let there be openness, truthfulness, faithfulness and trust. Use money as a tool to improve your marriage, never allows the enemy to use it against you. Handle it wisely.

2. Conflict: Conflict is another thing you must handle with wisdom and patience. There will always be misunderstanding and conflict but you must handle yours with prayer and care, lest it destabilizes your home. Avoid doing or saying things that will have a lasting negative impact. Use conflicts to improve your marriage; use it to connect with your spouse, use it as a stepping stone not a stumbling block, be positive, be open, be patient and be careful.

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3. In-Laws: In-laws should be handled with care and wisdom, they are part of our daily life. They can be the positive or negative types. They can be loving or wicked, caring or bossy. No matter what they are, it is your responsibility to use them to build your homes instead of allowing them to destroy our family.

4. Third parties: Apart from in-laws, third parties like friends, neighbors and family members must be handled with shrewdness. They must not be allowed to run the affairs of your family.

5. Children: We must be astute in dealing with children. We must train them in the way of the Lord, and bring them to the knowledge of Christ. Virtues of responsibility, honesty, diligence, focus, love, prudence, loyalty, patriotism, faithfulness should be taught and be inculcated in them.

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Many people have been wondering why God created man and then woman when it is easier for either man or woman to exist alone. Today, people are trying to walk away from God's divine arrangement of a man and a woman to get paired to same-sex or animals, preferably, their dogs, cats, etc. But God knows more than man. He is wiser than the wisest of all men put together. That is why He is called God.

The Bible tells us a lot about God and why He chose to make a man and paired him with a woman. Genesis, the book of beginnings tells us the story of God's creation of woman. It says that God created man in his own image, in His image He created them; male and female. When He saw the condition of the man He created, the Lord God said it is not good that the man should be alone, and He made him a woman - a suitable helper for him. And God blessed them, and commanded them to be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion!

From the above reference from the Book of books, the following can be deduced on why God paired the man and the woman:

1. To Be Rulers Together - God's original intent for man and woman was that they should be co-regents (rulers together) over the renewed Creation. This means that an equality of position and authority was God's intent. They were to rule together. This unique partnership is confirmed in the New Testament. "But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God" (I Corinthians11:3).

This teaches us that the relationship that exists between Christ the Son and (Adam) the man, was the same relationship God intended between the man (Adam) and the woman (Eve)"....and the head of the woman [Eve] is the man [Adam]". This also confirms that the role and relationship that exists between God the Father and Christ the Son, was the model the Scripture uses to illustrate what God intended the relationship between the man and the woman to be. Just as "the head of Christ is God" - so "the head of the woman is the man". If we are to understand the biblical role of man and woman, we must examine the relationship of God the Father to Christ the Son.

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2. Full Participation - Just as the Son depended on the Father for approval and authority to act, the woman acts in consort with the man. The Son does whatever He sees the Father doing in the same manner as He sees the Father doing it. So God intended the woman to fully participate in what the man does (John 5:19).

3. Responsibility Of Judging - The word judge is the Greek word krino, which means "to decide (judicially); to punish, avenge, judge, act as lawyer (barrister). Here, God's intent for woman as co-regent with the man is illustrated. The Church is the Bride of Christ. Paul says, "I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband; to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him" (2 Corinthians 11:2). The Bride (the Church) relates to the husband (Christ) just as God the Son relates to God the Father.

As the Bride of Christ, the members of the Church are called to "Judge Angels and men" and "things pertaining to this life" (I Corinthians 6:3; Ephesians 5:30-32). This feminine role given the Bride of Christ, the Church, is consistent with God's original intent for the woman to rule and exercise dominion with Adam, The woman is to also be empowered to exercise dominion in loving harmony with and in submission to the man.

4. Submission And Obedience - But Adam and Eve sinned, and God told Eve that her desire shall be to her husband, and he shall rule over her. So women were told to obey their husbands. That's the way it has remained, even into our New Testament times when the Apostle Paul told Christian wives to submit themselves unto their own husbands, as unto the Lord. But even though a woman was to obey her husband, she was not inferior to him. It just means that she should be willing to let him lead. In fact, Paul called for submission on the part of both the husband and the wife: "Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God" (Ephesians 5:21).

In another letter, Paul clearly stated that there is no difference of status in Christ between a man and a woman. He emphasized that there is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female, for they are all one in Christ Jesus. This means we need to really understand the role outlined in the Bible for the woman. It is wonderful and glorious!

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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