Just Say "No" to Drama

It seems as though one cannot make it through an entire day without drama popping up somewhere. Whether at work, in the news, or within our own homes, we are constantly surrounded with chaos and crisis. While some seem to thrive on it, others avoid it like the plague. Not all drama is harmful. Like stress, it can be an opportunity to develop problem solving skills that will also help us in other areas of our life. And it can motivate us to take a closer look at its source and make any necessary changes that benefit us and those around us.

Life is very much like the theater: there are dramas, mysteries, musicals, and comedies. You are the writer, producer, director, and actor of your own production who chooses what genre you live in and the nature of the script. You also choose which productions to purchase tickets for should the play be that of another play write. You are not required to attend or perform in the innovative work of any other person. If invited, you can always decline using the standard excuse, "I'm so sorry but I have other plans that evening."

Chaos gives the illusion of power as those who initiate or engage it in can at times evoke certain responses from the other actors. For some, this behavior is considered the norm as it has been present in their lives since the get go. Others assign themselves the role of victim to those who are stirring up drama. It is a behavior that, like drugs and alcohol, can become addictive. Severe or extended crises can damage one's health, relationships, and overall quality of life.

How does one remove or reduce chaotic behavior?

1. Know when to mind your own business, stay focused on your own life and work on your own issues. Be firm with your decision not to engage in other people's drama.

2. Keep everything in perspective. Not every event needs to be classified a crisis.

3. Offer assistance on important issues if necessary and you are so inclined to do so. Remain positive and hopeful. Help others to see things from a positive perspective.

4. Set conditions for your involvement such as what you are willing offer, how much/long/to what extent you will do so, and what is expected of the other party as well.

5. Know when it's time to withdraw and walk away without guilt or regret.

Like a great theatrical writer, carefully determine the genre of your life:

Choose comedy first, infusing generous doses of laughter and fun.

Introduce a little mystery, seeing life as a an adventure to discover, an enigma to unfold, a riddle to be solved.

Blend in a musical component: fill your play with beautiful music and song. Sing and dance with passion - it's good for the body and soul.

When necessary, prudently infuse a hint of drama, careful not to contaminate the overall substance of your production.

Inviting drama and chaos into your life drowns out any hope for inner peace. You were created to live peacefully and joyfully. So chose the content of your life carefully for you are the writer of your own destiny.

“Each one has to find his peace from within. And for peace to be real it must be unaffected by outside circumstances.” Ghandi

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