Let’s Show Ourselves Some Compassion

Every day, we’re faced with various challenges from the simple to the complex. However, what’s simple for one may be complex for another, and these challenges are rarely on equal footing. So why do our own accomplishments, though perhaps not as colorful or exciting, get lost when we look at these people who are considered to be larger than life?

Just because one person can succeed at a complex task doesn’t take away from the success of another who can’t perform on that level, but whose actions are equally beneficial. For example, although a professional athlete can make a standout play that wins the game for their team and thrill the many thousands of people watching, is that feat any more important or worthy of acknowledgment than a father who has a catch with his son and helps him feel that he is the most important boy in the world? What about a mother whose dedication to her daughter’s education helps her overcome learning disabilities that, if ignored, would have stymied her for life?

We all have talents and abilities that don’t necessarily make us stand out in a crowd, but within our circle of our families, friends, and co-workers, make impressions that help others learn and grow. In some ways these impressions, and the benefits they bring, can have an even more profound effect on those close to us, than the contributions of those whom we hold above us.

Can we really say that the discovery of a new drug to cure an illness is any more powerful than the words uttered in compassion to help heal one whose dreams and desires have been shattered?

In a simple act of compassion, one person can literally raise another from the depths of their despair that, until then, seemed insurmountable. An action that affects many is no different from one that affects just a few. Each has significant merit in its own right and should be recognized and applauded for its grandness — regardless of the scale.

As another example, how can anyone say that an individual who creates a movement had a bigger impact than one whose willingness to serve helped to create the platform from which that individual gained his/her prominence? Public acclaim often obscures the efforts of those who shy away from the limelight or selflessly sacrifice personal acclaim, success, or happiness to wholeheartedly serve the success and/or happiness of another.

The true measure of a society’s value is not what has been accomplished by the few, but by the contributions of all its peoples - G.S.

Each of us from the most celebrated to the least revered has in some way touched the heart of another on a very deep level, difficult as it may be to consider at times. Remember, every son and every daughter who has ever lived has had a mother.

Consider your own life: Think back to a time when through your actions you accomplished a goal that had that kind of impact. Perhaps a teacher, who assisted their students to learn a simple lesson in arithmetic helping to lay a foundation that helped that child achieve his/her dreams. Or a parent, whose acts of love and compassion helped their child experience true joy through their own unique and creative talents. Or maybe you are someone who in a casual moment saw the plight of another and lent a helping hand that restored that person’s faith in humanity and their own ability even if you didn’t know that your actions would have that effect. These types of actions don’t often get into the newspapers or make the evening news, but they are of significant consequence to those who experience them.

What about more mundane events such as completing a crossword puzzle, or finding your way to a new destination when you thought you couldn’t do it or by listening to your intuition, which told you that the item you were searching for would be in one store and not another. Sharing a story or joke with a friend and enjoying their laughter. Doing more in your workout than you thought possible. Organizing a cabinet or drawer. Gaining a new insight into an old problem, fear, or situation that opened the door to a new way of seeing the world.

These are just a few examples of everyday events that, when acknowledged, can help to build a sense of compassion for yourself and your own true worth. Remember, we are all beings of love, light, and compassion. Each of us has expressed that love and compassion to others in many ways and on many occasions, however, without taking the time to consciously acknowledge what we have done or the value that has been given.

This is mankind’s greatest inhumanity. Not the inhumanity we show each other through verbal or physical abuse, but the inhumanity we show to ourselves. If we can’t take the time to acknowledge ourselves for the positive things we do, how can we find it in ourselves to honor the positive things others do, without eventually feeling envious or jealous. By not honoring ourselves, while placing others on a pedestal, amplifies our feelings of dis-empowerment.

“It is lack of love for ourselves that inhibits our compassion toward others. If we make friends with ourselves, then there is no obstacle to opening our hearts and minds to others.” -

His Holiness the Dali Llama

If we each were to take a moment to reflect and consider all the positive things we’ve done in the course of the day, acknowledging ourselves for our efforts and recognizing the good in us, it would cause a significant shifting of the way we interact with one another. It would virtually end the feelings of “I can’t do it” or “I’m not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough.”

It would help each of us to reclaim our own uniqueness and gifts. It would empower us to awaken to the realization that no one can really do what we can do in the way we can do it. No one else can ever be as good at being us as we can.

Regardless of the adulation, recognition, and acclaim that those who stand in the public spotlight receive, it is in no way as significant and substantial as the strength and support we give to ourselves by acknowledging who we are and the good we do.

Each time you have a positive experience, receive a compliment, finish a project, bring joy to another, show another any form of true compassion or just feel good, take a moment to acknowledge and honor yourself for what you have accomplished and then watch your world change.