The statistics on married and cheating spell it out pretty clearly. Forty one percent of people admit to having an extramarital affair.

And nothing reinforces those numbers like the recent trends of certain websites whose sole purpose is to encourage people to cheat on their significant other. Is it shocking? Considering these sites have in essence gone mainstream with television ads probably not. More than anything it is probably a good indicator that business is booming for these companies.

However we have not become so jaded that the spouse who is being cheated on casually shrugs their shoulders and gives out with an "oh well" which is indifferent in tone.

The hurt, pain and anger are very real and there are more than a few people who are not ready to forgive and forget so easy. To be specific they decide to take matters in their own hands.

It may come in the form of getting a divorce and making the process as painful for the philandering party as possible. Or it could be that they decide to have an affair of their own. While neither of these is recommended they are definitely understandable.

One avenue however is not acceptable under any circumstances yet we have all seen enough news stories where the offended party chose exactly this path. And that is they allowed the anger and hurt to drive them to the ultimate extreme. Violence.

For one thing it cannot change the reality of what happened. For another no one has the right to do bodily harm to another person. Your feelings are hurt and you feel betrayed but all that will pass in time. Violence is permanent and all you do is bring misery to people directly or indirectly involved like family and friends.

A bad situation has been made horribly worse. Yet everyday around the world people make that decision or allow their emotions to make it for them. The satisfaction and revenge they hope for never materializes. Truthfully it never can. The course they chose guarantees that.

If your spouse is have and affair it is quite understandable that you would be hurt but don't let it be your driving force. If need be file for divorce get a good lawyer and take them to the cleaners. All the while making sure you are taking the right steps to rebuild your life.

Choosing violence means you are choosing to be more wrong than your cheating spouse. Infinitely more wrong. And there is no recovering from that.

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For information on how to survive an extramarital affair please visit the Relationship Tip. Article written by Daryl Campbell