My Husband Is Miserable In Our Marriage: My Husband Is Unhappy With His Life - Living With A Miserable Husband
Both men and women long for a long lasting and happy marriage. Nobody gets into a marriage without wanting it to work. The sad fact is that they don't work hard to make it successful. If you want some tips of how to keep your man interested and in love with you after years of marriage, read on!
Make him and your marriage the first priority in your life
You have to realize that this union is not only important but it is sacred. Don't try to change who you are. Continue to be the woman he fell in love with and he will never lose interest in you even after many years of marriage.
Don't let the bond between you disintegrate
Even though your marriage started off great it can subtly and slowly disintegrate if you allow it to. You have to give your husband all the time, attention and love you gave him in the beginning. If he feels loved and cherished he will never stop loving you. Keep the bond strong by being patient and loving.
Fix the wrongs
Since you are married for all these years, you obviously know the weaknesses and faults, the strengths and plus points your marriage has. It is your duty to make sure that you fix all the things that need fixing in your marriage. Check up and see what you can do to identify the worst problems and deal with them immediately.
What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?
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Don't insist on having the last word
Fighting, arguing and being stubborn are the main reasons for any marriage do develop some serious cracks! You don't have to be the one winning the argument every time! Don't insist on having the last word as it will put him off big time! Be generous and let him have his way once in a while to keep him happy.
Don't start living your own life!
After a few years of marriage, the man and the woman tend to take each other for granted and get lazy about keeping the attraction and interest alive. As a result, each one does his or her "own thing" even though they are living together. This is a dangerous situation as it is very probable that one or the other will have an affair.
Don't let the sun go down on your anger
This is the wisest and best way to keep the love and affection for each other strong. Anger and temper tantrums can ruin the best of relationships. Being generous, humble and patient with your spouse is the best way to make him appreciate you and thank his lucky stars that he has you in his life.
Don't let your looks slide downhill
Its all very well that you love each other, but the more gorgeous you manage to look, the more he will want you. Sex is a big part of any marriage and as long as he feels desire for you, the more chances you have of keeping him interested in you.
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Can you still have romance without finance? Absolutely! There are things you can do to keep the passion alive that doesn't need to break the bank. This is good relationship advice for women and good relationship advice for men as well. We tend to not think about husbands out there needing attention and little reminders that they are loved, but they need it just as much as women do. Here are several little tidbits of marriage relationship advice that can keep your marriage fun, hot, and the envy of other couples!
If your spouse takes their lunch, slip a little note in there. The note can be as sweet or risqué as you want. Tell him how you can't wait for them to get home or how nice she looked this morning. At least once a day, give your spouse a big, juicy kiss and hug. Not just a quick peck on the run we're all guilty of at times, but a real kiss with your bodies pressed against each other.
I love it when my husband comes up behind me in the kitchen and wraps his arms around my waist and kisses my neck from behind. When you're out, in a crowd, at a family dinner -- anywhere you can't say the words I love you out loud, just wink at your spouse and smile. Mouth the words I love you. It will bring a smile to their lips, I guarantee.
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When you are running errands, pick up something small you know your spouse likes. Something simple like a candy bar, card, favorite magazine, flowers any little thing you know they like. It lets the other person know that you are thinking about them no matter where they are. One thing that wives always love is when their husband offers to help out with chores, run an extra errand, or offer to handle the kids for an hour. In fact, recent studies have shown that husbands who help out more around the house have wives who get intimate with them a lot more often!
Wives can offer to help their husbands too -- offer to make a phone call or schedule maintenance at the house. Always, always express your appreciation for the other person. The most help for marriage comes from learning to appreciate and respect your partner. Take the time to say that you think she's a great mom, or you appreciate how hard he's been working lately. Your spouse isn't going to just know that you feel that way. He can't read your mind, and she likes to know that she's appreciated. This is one of the best pieces of advice on marriage you'll ever hear.
Most of these pieces of marriage relationship advice take very little time and cost little or nothing to do for each other. You'll be surprised how expressing a little affection becomes infectious. Your spouse may curiously smile and ask what that was for at first, but they will quickly start to reciprocate the same affection towards you.
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Because abuse and violence, or cheating and infidelity in marriage are not the only ones that are of the ingredients of an unhealthy relationship, let's look at how to heal a broken relationship by avoiding particular ugly traps.
Keep in mind as you read on that the Course in Miracles states, "Time is indeed unkind to the holy relationship. For time is cruel in the ego's hands, as it is kind when used for gentleness."
Making a mountain from a molehill
Do you want to live in peace with your beloved?
In specific, suspect your analyses: right away designating an unfavorable significance to a sentence, a gesture which you didn't understand well, leads to misconceptions - which kills off your agreement.
If there's aggressiveness and verbal violence, to break your love relationship surely will happen.
Unjustified attacks of jealousy
It is a tribute to you, one more evidence of your good taste, of the great option you have made.
As for you, lovely women, if 'he' unconsciously turns and notices deeply a passing young lady, do not take this gesture of innocent adoration as a precursor of adultery!
It's a great way to kill your love relationship: uninspired jealousy.
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Having far too much stress and anxiety in your career or job.
Disregarding the omnipresent threats of regular
Thanks to your stable efforts, you have actually seduced your beloved, you have actually 'conquered' him/her.
One day, you chose to join your fates. Splendid! At least, at the beginning... Why therefore would you take the threat of loosening the pressure?
Of stopping your efforts?
They are the key to your happiness!
Always remember to continue: just as all you want to see going on enough time (your home, your garden, your cars and truck) -, you'll have to look after your love.
Think, each of you, of making little unforeseen and routine satisfaction to your cherished, to have some attentions for them, to reveal your tenderness, to break the daily rut by a touch of excitement.
Among others, in your moments of intimacy break your couple's routine and have and explore fun with each other!
And taking that home with you is a big time stab in the heart leading to an unhealthy relationship.
In order to live a lasting relationship, or how to save your relationship, you have to remain mindfully available for your wife/husband or significant other.
Be sure to live to enjoy, and to bring moments of happiness to your man or woman who you so deeply cherish!
Letting discussion fade, losing true interaction.
Previously I discussed helpful free material on the net for ideas on mending the marriage when things just don't seem right.
Numerous couples share the same bed, particular meals, TV programs; they sometimes go out together.
Without any more true interaction, the couple imperceptibly loses any real contact.
Think about those fallen-out-of-love couples you once in a while see at dining establishments: they're dealing with each other, indifferent one to another; they don't look at each other anymore, don't speak to each other any longer.
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To rid yourself of making comparisons
Clearly, your 'ex' (or somebody among your acquaintances) said or did specific things better; was more this, less that:" (s) he, 'at least'... "
Who is perfect in the world?
Just make positive ones if you often make a comparison. Otherwise keep silent your disappointed views, bitter or disenchanted reflections.
You particularly valued these qualities in the past?
Perhaps throughout a previous relationship?
By revealing them yourself, you'll fast find how contagious they are: "Give and thou will receive!"( or something like that)...
Benefit from it to explain to your beloved what would please you; express your expectations, without vain shyness; talk to them about your desires.
Bear in mind that you chose your partner; the qualities they're missing are most likely compensated by others.
Your tenderness, your supports, your frequent issue to value him/ her, will round angles, making these comparisons quickly spoil and there you will have an unhealthy relationship.
Try not to, for lack of a better phrase, 'creak the springs' of your relationship by not ever comparing him/her to someone else "you wish he/she could rather be."
That attitude right there brings on quickly an unhealthy relationship.
Calling your children to witness
All couples often face tough moments, arguing periodically, exchanging reproaches, - in all or in part, justified.
These are adults' concerns!
Including your children, even unintentionally, hurts them.
This is the simple way to raise, bit by bit, a wall of incomprehension, of "un-love" and quickly, of hatred and an unhealthy relationship.
(I always suggest searching the web for more content to help on matters like, how to heal a broken relationship.)
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For most people, holiday celebrations and rituals follow the traditions of their family of origin. And, for many people, that has a lovely comforting quality to it, as this holiday looks remarkably like the ones that preceded it. But what happens when two people from different families come together to make their own new family?
Sandy and Nick were approaching their first Christmas together.
As soon as the Thanksgiving meal had been cleared away, Sandy ran to the closet and dragged out her box of ornaments and the sparkly silver aluminum tree on which to hang them. Nick looked up from his newspaper to see her carefully balancing the smaller box with the ornaments on the bigger box that held the tree.
"What are you doing? It's still officially Thanksgiving. You can't put up a Christmas tree yet."
"What do you mean? The turkey's history. This is officially the start of the Christmas season."
"It is NOT. The Christmas season starts when we countdown the Twelve Days of Christmas, just like the song."
"I'm not waiting. I love every single minute of this time of year. Now come help me assemble the tree."
"Help you... 'assemble'... the tree? Christmas trees aren't assembled; they're grown. We'll go to the Christmas tree farm the weekend before Christmas and cut our own."
"Suddenly you're a lumberjack? Don't be silly. Real trees drop their pointy little, toe-pricking needles all over the carpet; and you end up picking them out of the carpet until Easter. No way."
"Well, no way you're going to put up that stupid Jetsons version of a tree. It doesn't even smell like a Christmas tree."
"Don't worry; you'll love how it looks once I put up all the ornaments. They're all crystal. The effect is all magically sparkly, like a fairy Christmas tree."
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"They're all crystal? But our tree always has keepsake ornaments and decorations on it. My mom gave me a box of stuff that's always on our tree. I even have the first popcorn garland that I ever made and the first pinecone ornaments."
"You want to put popcorn and pinecones on my fairy tree? But it will totally spoil the effect!"
Her lip was quivering. His jaw was set.
She went into the kitchen and made a cup of tea, sniffling back the unshed tears. He went to the garage and started bagging the Thanksgiving trash, using more than the minimum necessary force to compact the bags.
Each of them having taken a therapeutic time-out, they were both ready to re-enter the arena. Demonstrating the synchrony that they'd always enjoyed about their relationship, they entered the living room at the same time, albeit from different directions. That made them smile.
"Sandy, we're a family now. It's not about my traditions or your traditions. It's about making our traditions."
"Nick, I know that not everybody does everything the same way. I've just always considered the alternatives, well, wrong."
"I understand that. When you brought out your sparkly tree, all I could think about was how wrong the whole idea was. I think I need the smell of pine. It smells like Christmas."
"Yeah, I get that. I always loved that my Grandma Tucker's house smelled like pine. Her tree always looked like a real bird might be living in it."
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"My Aunt Doris always had a tree that was decorated with crystal ornaments. I thought it was magical and that if I listened really hard, I'd be able to hear the crystal sing."
"Can't we have magic AND Christmas smell? Nick, can we have it all?" Her eyes were dancing and she was getting so excited that she could barely stand still. He was captivated by her excitement.
"Why not? I want the magic of Aunt Doris's crystal tree; you want the smell of Grandma Tucker's house. I want you to have what you want; and I know that you want me to have what's important to me. Let's start figuring out what we each want and start building our own Christmas map-a map to our very own holiday tradition."
"But how do we really do that?"
"Well, for starters, we'll have two trees. We can put your fairy tree here in front of the window, decorated only with crystal ornaments; and we can set up a 'real' tree on the tile in the family room, where it's super easy to sweep up the needles. I'll hang the popcorn and pinecones on that one."
"Nick, you are a genius!" She hugged him hard. Then she frowned as she considered some of the details on which she realized they might differ, like when to open presents, when to go to church, whether Christmas dinner was ham or turkey, or, she thought with horror, goose!
"Nick, this is really going to take work. There are a thousand details to holidays. We can't just have two of everything."
"I know; but I figure if we talk about everything and stay focused on making a tradition that works for both of us, we'll manage. What good is a Christmas that only works for one of us? We'll make holiday traditions that are about us, our family. And then our kids can think that it's the only right way to do Christmas."
Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.
You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.
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