Now, if someone was to take a step back and to reflect on how they see themselves and their life, they may come to the conclusion that they have a ‘negative mindset’. If they were to open about to someone else, this person could also say the same thing.

If they were to make a note of how they see themselves, they could write down some, if not all, of the following:

• That they are not enough
• That they are a failure
• That they have no value
• That they are unworthy
• That they are incapable

The Other Part

And, if they were to make a note of how they see life, they could write down some, if not all of the following:

• That life is a struggle
• That the world is cold
• That people don’t like them
• That the world is dangerous
• That people want to hold them back

When it comes to what they write down, they could see that they have had these views for as long as they can remember. Therefore, although they might not have been completely aware of each point, they won’t be surprised by what they have listed.

External Advice

The way in which they see themselves and the world is going to define how they experience life. Thus, for them to live a life that is worth living, it will be essential for them to change their perception.

If they were to look for information on how they can do this, they may soon be told that they need to change what is taking place in their mind. What is going up top is then going to be what is holding them back from living the life that they were ‘born to live’.

Worth The Effort

After accepting that this is the right approach, they could end up questioning what they believe and replacing negative thoughts with positive thoughts. In addition to this, they could start to change their behaviour.

As the weeks and months go by, one could find that their life gradually begins to change. They could be amazed by what has taken place, with it being clear how much of an effect their mindset has on their life.

Another Experience

At the same time, one may find that they are only able to get so far or that this approach doesn’t work. They could change what is going on up top but still find that their view of themselves and the world doesn’t really change.

If anything, it could be as though they are trying to deny how they really feel and to put on an act. It might be hard for them to accept, at this point, that their thoughts create how they feel.

Going Deeper

The reason that changing their mindset is not working could be because they are carrying trauma. Their body is then going to be loaded up with pain and so purely playing around with what is going on in their mind is not going to be the answer.

And even if this approach did work, it might only be a matter of time before their view of themselves and their life would start to fall apart. What is held deep within them would end up undermining them as opposed to something or someone that is ‘out there’.

Back In Time

During their early years, they may have been abused and/or neglected on a weekly, if not daily, basis. Naturally, this would have caused them to develop a negative view of themselves and the world.

There would have been the meaning that their mind made and there would have been the emotional effect of what took place. It is then not be expected that they will have a negative mindset now that they are an adult, but for them to let go of this mindset, they will also need to resolve what is held in their body.

Rearranging the Furniture on the Titanic

Ultimately, they can play around with their mind as much as they want yet this wont resolve what is taking place at a deeper level. What is taking place in their body will support and sustain the negative view that their mind has of them and it will cause them to manifest situations, circumstances and events that are in alignment with how they view the world.

What this comes down to is that it is not just their thoughts that define their reality, it is also their feelings. And while their thoughts can create their feelings, the feelings that are held in their body will also play a part in what thoughts they have.

For Example

If one is carrying a lot of toxic shame from their early years, it is going to be incredibly difficult for them to feel good about themselves or to expect their fellow human beings to accept them. This feeling, or inner experience as it’s more than a feeling, will cause them to have negative thoughts.

Without this deeper understanding of what is going on, the obvious thing would be for them to change what is going on in their mind. But, as this diagnosis wouldn’t take every aspect of what is going on into account, it is not going to be very effective.


If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or healer.

Author's Bio: 

Author, transformational writer, teacher and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand, five hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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