Overcoming the Fear of Dying

When we identify with our body, our life-force, our mind, we feel like our entire existence is wrapped up in this body, this lifetime. We have a natural instinct, in our external nature, to live, to survive, and we remain unaware of what preceded this lifetime and what follows afterwards. To fill this gap, we create ideas that span the range from ‘you only live once’, and ‘eat, drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die’ to the idea that after we die we will go to some heaven or be resurrected to join our family in heaven at some future point in time. Many people simply do not accept the idea that there is anything afterwards, and this reinforces their fear of death.

We continually search for ways to extend our lives, even to the extent of trading all comfort and enjoyment, and undergoing constant and intense pain, for just a short extension of our life-span. All of this stems from our identification with the body.

The Taittiriya Upanishad, the Bhriguvalli, has the student asking about the ultimate reality. He is asked to undertake tapasya, concentration of conscious force, to find the answer. His first answer came back that matter, the physical body, is the reality. He is asked to continue. He then responds that prana, the life-force is the reality. As he continues, he next understands that the mind is that reality. Then the higher reason. Then ananda, bliss of existence, which is part of the tripartite reality of Sat-Chit-Ananda, Existence-Consciousness-Bliss. He finally understands that the physical body, the material reality is the result, not the cause, as he gains insight into the Eternal.

Sri Ramana Maharshi, the sage of Arunachala, followed his own line of inquiry by continually asking ‘who am I’. The focus on this question draws the seeker ever-deeper, and, similar to the experience related in the Taittiriya Upanishad, the seeker eventually comes to understand that the entire external reality is subordinate to the Eternal, the Infinite, the Immortal Being of which the soul is a part.

The Mother describes both this approach and another one which is simply opening oneself to the experience of the psychic being, and through that experience, one KNOWS, without thought, without fear, without doubt.

The Mother writes: “There is another [remedy for fear of dying], a little more difficult, but better, I believe. It lies in telling oneself: ‘This body is not I’, and in trying to find in oneself the part which is truly one’s self, until one has found one’s psychic being. And when one has found one’s psychic being — immediately, you understand — one has the sense of immortality. And one knows that what goes out or what comes in is just a matter of convenience: ‘I am not going to weep over a pair of shoes I put aside when it is full of holes! When my pair of shoes is worn out I cast it aside, and I do not weep.’ Well, the psychic being has taken this body because it needed to use it for its work, but when the time comes to leave the body, that is to say, when one must leave it because it is no longer of any use for some reason or other, one leaves the body and has no fear. It is quite a natural gesture — and it is done without the least regret, that’s all.”

“And the moment you are in your psychic being, you have that feeling, spontaneously, effortlessly. You soar above the physical life and have the sense of immortality. As for me, I consider this the best remedy. The other is an intellectual, common-sense, rational remedy. This is a deep experience and you can always get it back as soon as you recover the contact with your psychic being. This is a truly interesting phenomenon, for it is automatic. The moment you are in contact with your psychic being, you have the feeling of immortality, of having always been and being always, eternally. And then what comes and goes — these are life’s accidents, they have no importance.”

reference: Sri Aurobindo and the Mother, The Psychic Being — Soul: Its Nature, Mission and Evolution, Section 6 More Lights on the Psychic Being, pp. 174-175