The hardest job you'll ever have is being a parent. And of course you want to be the best parent you can be. How do you keep a child from being spoiled? How do you teach values, compassion, work ethic, and self-esteem? How do you foster empathy, honesty, self-reliance, self-control, kindness, cooperation and joy? How does a parent promote intellectual curiosity, motivation and passion? By being a consistent healthy role model.

1. Allow your child autonomy. Allow them to be who they are, make their own decisions and voice their truth. Separate what’s in your child’s best interests from what you want for them. They have their own wants and aspirations. Refrain from undermining intrinsic motivation – the natural self-determined spontaneity, curiosity and genuineness – through extrinsic materialistic reward. Encourage the desire to engage fully in activity for its own sake. Support excellence, doing one’s best, rather than just competitive wins.

2. Show your children that mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow. Let go of over protective tendencies if there is no real threat of danger. Provide constructive feedback to help your child discover ways to create a better outcome the next time around. Without a fear of making mistakes children learn to face difficulties with spirit and courage.  Set the example by modeling this wisdom in your own experience.

3. Distinguish behavior as separate from the child as a person.  If the child does something 'bad' be sure to identify the act as the bad, not the child.  Children take "You're a bad little boy" quite literally. They ‘misunderstand’ that they are fundamentally flawed as people instead of a child who did something inappropriate.

4. Model the values you wish to impart to your children. Children mirror your behavior not your words. They learn how to show up in the world by your example. Are you a poster parent for entitlement? Do you invest in your highest ideals or ego-driven wants? Are your friends from diverse socio-economic backgrounds? Be the kind of person you want your child to respect.

A powerful sense of self is the greatest gift you can give your children beyond the opportunity your wealth affords. It teaches them how to be responsible with their wealth legacy. It teaches them values that have little to do with entitlement or material abundance.

Author's Bio: 

Valery is a Mentor, Coach & Author who provides an all in one toolkit and training course that give you the necessary tools and information to get over the unique challenges that come from success, fame and fortune. Championing those who have or aspire fame and/or fortune to maximize their potential is her calling. She's fully prepared to engage clients with her experience, extensive training, certifications. For more information please visit