Sympathy for the Younger Widow

Sometimes the unexpected happens. The young wife or husband loses their spouse before their life even had time to get started. This is one of those times where you must be extra careful of what you say. While you may have mixed feelings yourself, you should avoid making comments like “it’s good thing you didn’t have children” or “at least you didn’t spend your whole life together.” Saying these things can be so hurtful, and only remind them of all they lost.

The best thing you can do to help the young widow, is to help them take the memories they do have and make the most out of them. There is no time limit to grief. There is no magical formula that says if you are married this long you have this long to grieve. Grief is a very personal, very subjective thing. Just because the loss is early in their life, does not equal any less pain then if they had been married for many years.

If you are a close friend, find the time to sit and talk. Let them lead the conversation. If their grief seems to be overwhelming them, suggest counseling or speaking to a pastor at their church. While no time limits can be put on mourning, there can be signs of depression. Be a good friend and be honest. Encourage them to find a way to honor their loved ones life. Raising donations for research if they lost their spouse to cancer, volunteering to help others who are also hurting can help to bring healing to their own heart as well as others.

While your friend may not seem to need as much help as a family with children, it also means this person does not have normal everyday life calling them back from their mourning. They don’t have anyone they need to cook dinner for, or take to school, or help to deal with the loss. They may feel as if they are single again, and alone. Knowing they still have friends that care will help them to move through this difficult time in their life with a little more ease.

Author's Bio: 

Susan Kroeker is an author and contributor for the Sympathy From The Heart Blog found at Planet Gift Baskets, an industry leader in sympathy gifts and gift baskets.