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Articles from Sam Vaknin | Selfgrowth.com
- Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) - by Submitted on Mar 24, 2008 from Sam Vaknin(I use "she" throughout this article but it applies to male victims as well) Contrary to popular misconceptions, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and Acute Stress Disorder (or Reaction) are not typical responses to prolonged abuse. They are the outcomes of sudden exposure to severe or ...
Views: 1785 - Conduct Disorder - by Submitted on Jun 10, 2007 from Sam VakninChildren and adolescents with conduct disorder are budding psychopaths. They repeatedly and deliberately (and joyfully) violate the rights of others and breach age-appropriate social norms and rules. Some of them gleefully hurt and torture people or, more frequently, animals. Others damage ...
Views: 1779 - The Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jul 17, 2007 from Sam VakninDisclaimer The Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Personality Disorder appears in Appendix B of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM), titled "Criteria Sets and Axes Provided for Further Study." Notes of first therapy session with Mike, male, 52, diagnosed with Negativistic ...
Views: 1751 - Coping with Your Stalker - by Submitted on Feb 06, 2008 from Sam VakninAbuse by proxy continues long after the relationship is officially over (at least as far as you are concerned). The majority of abusers get the message, however belatedly and reluctantly. Others – more vindictive and obsessed – continue to haunt their ex-spouses for years to come. ...
Views: 1715 - Statistics Of Abuse And Stalking - by Submitted on Feb 07, 2008 from Sam VakninBefore we proceed to outline the psychological profile of the stalker, it is important to try and gauge the extent of the problem by quantifying its different manifestations. More plainly, studying the available statistics is both enlightening and useful. Contrary to common opinion, there has ...
Views: 1667 - The Stalker As Antisocial Bully - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2008 from Sam VakninStalkers have narcissistic traits. Many of them suffer from personality disorders. The vindictive stalker is usually a psychopath (has Antisocial Personality Disorder). They all conform to the classic definition of a bully. Before we proceed to delineate coping strategies, it is helpful to ...
Views: 1629 - Adolescent Narcissist - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jun 16, 2008 from Sam VakninDonovan, 16 years old, is incapable of loving and, therefore, has never loved you, his mother (or, for that matter, anyone else, himself included) in his entire life. His natural capacity to love and to return love was all but eliminated by his horrid childhood. We practice loving first and ...
Views: 1622 - Gender Bias in Diagnosing Personality Disorders - by Submitted on May 20, 2007 from Sam VakninEver since Freud, more women than men sought therapy. Consequently, terms like "hysteria' are intimately connected to female physiology and alleged female psychology. The DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, the bible of the psychiatric profession) expressly professes gender bias: personality ...
Views: 1611(1 vote) - Paranoid Personality Disorder - by Submitted on May 15, 2007 from Sam VakninThe paranoid's world is hostile, arbitrary, malicious, and unpredictable. Consequently, he or she distrusts others and suspects them. No good deed goes unpunished. Every gesture of goodwill is surely fuelled by ulterior, self-interested and uncharitable motives. Paranoids are firmly convinced ...
Views: 1584 - Empathy and Personality Disorders - by Submitted on Aug 20, 2007 from Sam VakninWhat is Empathy? Normal people use a variety of abstract concepts and psychological constructs to relate to other persons. Emotions are such modes of inter-relatedness. Narcissists and psychopaths are different. Their "equipment" is lacking. They understand only one language: self-interest. ...
Views: 1583 - The Borderline Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jun 25, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with T. Dal, female, 26, diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) Dal is an attractive young woman but seems to be unable to maintain a stable sense of self-worth and self-esteem. Her confidence in her ability to "hold on to men" is at a low ebb, ...
Views: 1578 - Victim Reaction to Abuse by Narcissists and Psychopaths - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2007 from Sam VakninPersonality disorders are not only all-pervasive, but also diffuse and shape-shifting. It is taxing and emotionally harrowing to watch how a loved one is consumed by these pernicious and largely incurable conditions. Victims adopt varying stances and react in different ways to the inevitable ...
Views: 1563 - Body Language and Personality Disorders - by Submitted on Jun 18, 2007 from Sam VakninPatients with personality disorders have a body language specific to their disorder. It comprises an unequivocal series of subtle presenting signs. The patient's body language usually reflects the underlying mental health problem. For instance: people with Avoidant Personality Disorder and ...
Views: 1560 - Avoiding Your Abuser - The Submissive Posture - by Submitted on Sep 06, 2007 from Sam VakninThere is nothing special about the body language or behavior patterns of the abuser. If your abuser is a narcissist, his pathology is evident on first sight (read "How to Recognize a Narcissist"). But not all abusers are narcissists. Regrettably, most victims find themselves trapped long before ...
Views: 1538 - Recovery And Healing - by Submitted on Mar 26, 2008 from Sam VakninVictims of abuse in all its forms – verbal, emotional, financial, physical, and sexual – are often disorientated. They require not only therapy to heal their emotional wounds, but also practical guidance and topical education. At first, the victim is, naturally, distrustful and even hostile. The ...
Views: 1518 - The Development of the Narcissist - by Submitted on Dec 05, 2008 from Sam VakninWe are born with abilities of the first order (abilities to do) and of the second order (potentials, abilities to develop abilities to do). Our environment, though, is critical to the manifestation of these abilities. It is through socialisation and comparison with others that we bring our ...
Views: 1512 - The Narcissist in Therapy - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2007 from Sam VakninThe narcissist regards therapy as a competitive sport. In therapy the narcissist usually immediately insists that he (or she) is equal to the psychotherapist in knowledge, in experience, or in social status. To substantiate this claim and "level the playing field", the narcissist in the ...
Views: 1512 - Narcissists and Psychopaths - Responsibility and Other Matters - by Submitted on Jun 02, 2008 from Sam VakninQuestion: The narcissist is not entirely responsible for his actions. Should we judge him, get angry at him, be upset by him? Above all, should we communicate to him our displeasure? Answer: The narcissist knows to tell right from wrong. He is perfectly capable of anticipating the results of ...
Views: 1495 - Conning The System - by Submitted on Jan 17, 2008 from Sam VakninEven a complete battery of tests, administered by experienced professionals sometimes fails to identify abusers and their personality disorders. Offenders are uncanny in their ability to deceive their evaluators. They often succeed in transforming therapists and diagnosticians into four types of ...
Views: 1489 - Abuse By Proxy - by Submitted on Oct 08, 2007 from Sam VakninIf all else fails, the abuser recruits friends, colleagues, mates, family members, the authorities, institutions, neighbours, the media, teachers – in short, third parties – to do his bidding. He uses them to cajole, coerce, threaten, stalk, offer, retreat, tempt, convince, harass, communicate ...
Views: 1488 - Restraining Orders and Peace Bonds - by Submitted on Dec 05, 2007 from Sam VakninIf you want the nightmare to end, there is a rule of thumb which requires courage and determination to implement: Involve the courts whenever possible. In many countries, the first step is to obtain a restraining order from a civil court as part of your divorce or custody proceedings or as a ...
Views: 1478 - The Conflicts Of Therapy - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2008 from Sam VakninDisclaimer Statistically, the majority of abuse victims are female and most abusers are male. Still, we should bear in mind that there are male victims and female offenders as well. Ideally, after a period of combined tutoring, talk therapy, and (anti-anxiety or antidepressant) medications, ...
Views: 1474 - Testing The Abuser - by Submitted on Jan 14, 2008 from Sam VakninIt is clear that each abuser requires individual psychotherapy, tailored to his specific needs – on top of the usual group therapy and marital (or couple) therapy. At the very least, every offender should be required to undergo the following tests to provide a complete picture of his personality ...
Views: 1472 - Interacting With Your Abuser - by Submitted on Jan 30, 2008 from Sam VakninHaving chosen your team of consultants and experts – and having hired their services – relegate any inevitable contact with your abusive ex – when and where possible – to professionals: your lawyer, or your accountant. Work with these qualified third parties to extricate yourself and your loved ...
Views: 1428 - Misdiagnosing Personality Disorders as Asperger's Disorder - by Submitted on Aug 06, 2007 from Sam VakninPersonality disorders cannot be safely diagnosed prior to early adolescence. Still, though frequently found between the ages of 3 and 6, Asperger's Disorder is often misdiagnosed as a cluster B personality disorder, most often as the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). The Asperger's ...
Views: 1419 - Working With Professionals - by Submitted on Jan 29, 2008 from Sam VakninSelecting the right professional is crucial. In the hands of an incompetent service provider, you may end up feeling abused all over again. Go through the following check list before you settle on a divorce attorney, a financial consultant, a tax planner, a security adviser, or an accountant. ...
Views: 1416 - Misdiagnosing Personality Disorders as Bipolar I Disorder - by Submitted on Aug 01, 2007 from Sam VakninThe manic phase of the Bipolar I Disorder is often misdiagnosed as a Personality Disorder. In the manic phase of Bipolar Disorder, patients exhibit many of the signs and symptoms of certain personality disorders, such as the Narcissistic, Borderline, Histrionic, or even Schizotypal Personality ...
Views: 1408 - The Abuser's Body Language - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2007 from Sam VakninMany abusers have a specific body language. It comprises an unequivocal series of subtle – but discernible – warning signs. Pay attention to the way your date comports himself – and save yourself a lot of trouble! Abusers are an elusive breed, hard to spot, harder to pinpoint, impossible to ...
Views: 1400 - The Abuser in Denial - by Submitted on Sep 04, 2007 from Sam VakninAbusers regularly deny the abuse ever took place – or rationalize their abusive behaviors. Denial is an integral part of the abuser's ability to "look at himself/herself in the mirror". There are many types of denial. When confronted by his victims, most abusers tend to shift blame or avoid the ...
Views: 1397 - The Narcissistic Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Sam V., male, 43, diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) Sam presents with anhedonia (failure to enjoy or find pleasure in anything) and dysphoria bordering on depression. He complains of inability to tolerate people's stupidity and ...
Views: 1364 - Depressive Personality Disorder - by Submitted on May 24, 2007 from Sam VakninThe Depressive Personality Disorder is not yet recognized by the DSM Committee. It makes its appearances in Appendix B of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, titled "Criteria Sets and Axes Provided for Further Study." It is not clear in what way is the Depressive Personality Disorder ...
Views: 1355 - Five Factor Personality Model - by Submitted on May 16, 2007 from Sam VakninThe Five Factor Model was suggested by two researchers, Costa and McCrae, in 1989. The designers of previous factor models sifted through bulky dictionaries and came up with thousands of words to describe human nature in all its variability. Not so the inventors of the Five Factor Model. It is ...
Views: 1346 - The Dependent Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jul 16, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Mona, female, 32, diagnosed with Dependent Personality Disorder (or Codependence) "I know I won't actually die, but it often feels like it." - says Mona and nervously pats her auburn hair - "I can't live without him, that's for sure. When he is gone, it's ...
Views: 1316 - Befriending The System - by Submitted on Jan 22, 2008 from Sam VakninIn the process of mediation, marital therapy, or evaluation, counselors frequently propose various techniques to ameliorate the abuse or bring it under control. Woe betides the party that dares object or turn these "recommendations" down. Thus, an abuse victim who declines to have any further ...
Views: 1308 - International Classification of Diseases (ICD) 10 - by Submitted on May 28, 2007 from Sam VakninThe International Classification of Diseases (ICD) is published by the World Health Organization in Geneva, Switzerland. It included mental health disorders for the first time in 1948, in its sixth edition. In 1959, following widespread criticism of its classificatory scheme, the WHO ...
Views: 1305 - Avoiding Your Abuser - The Conflictive Posture - by Submitted on Sep 07, 2007 from Sam VakninThere is nothing special about the body language or behavior patterns of the abuser. If your abuser is a narcissist, his pathology is evident on first sight (read "How to Recognize a Narcissist"). But not all abusers are narcissists. Regrettably, most victims find themselves trapped long before ...
Views: 1248 - Sex and Personality Disorders - by Submitted on Jun 19, 2007 from Sam VakninOur sexual behavior expresses not only our psychosexual makeup but also the entirety of our personality. Sex is the one realm of conduct which involves the full gamut of emotions, cognitions, socialization, traits, heredity, and learned and acquired behaviors. By observing one's sexual ...
Views: 1246 - Psychosexual Stages of Personal Development - by Submitted on May 28, 2007 from Sam VakninThe Viennese neurologist, Sigmund Freud, was among the first to offer a model of psychological development in early childhood (within the framework of psychoanalysis). He closely linked the sex drive (libido) to the formation of personality and described five psychosexual stages, four of which ...
Views: 1226 - The Avoidant Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jun 28, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Gladys, female, 26, diagnosed with Avoidant Personality Disorder "I would like to be normal" - says Gladys and blushes purple. In which sense is she abnormal? She prefers reading books and watching movies with her elderly mother to going out with her ...
Views: 1153 - Is the Narcissist Legally Insane? - by Submitted on Jun 20, 2007 from Sam VakninNarcissists are not prone to "irresistible impulses" and dissociation (blanking out certain stressful events and actions). They more or less fully control their behavior and acts at all times. But exerting control over one's conduct requires the investment of resources, both mental and physical. ...
Views: 1145 - The Mind Of The Abuser - by Submitted on Dec 13, 2007 from Sam VakninTo embark on our exploration of the abusive mind, we first need to agree on a taxonomy of abusive behaviours. Methodically observing abuse is the surest way of getting to know the perpetrators. Abusers appear to be suffering from dissociation (multiple personality). At home, they are ...
Views: 1143 - Genetics and Personality Disorders - by Submitted on May 20, 2007 from Sam VakninAre personality disorders the outcomes of inherited traits? Are they brought on by abusive and traumatizing upbringing? Or, maybe they are the sad results of the confluence of both? To identify the role of heredity, researchers have resorted to a few tactics: they studied the occurrence of ...
Views: 1141 - The Paranoid Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Aug 16, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Dale G., male, 46, diagnosed with Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD) Dale's first enquiry is whether I am in any way associated either with the government or with his former employer. He doesn't seem reassured by my negative response. He eyes me skeptically ...
Views: 1133 - Addiction and Personality - by Submitted on Jun 12, 2007 from Sam VakninA voluminous literature notwithstanding, there is little convincing empirical research about the correlation between personality traits and addictive behaviors. Substance abuse and dependence (alcoholism, drug addiction) is only one form of recurrent and self-defeating pattern of misconduct. ...
Views: 1126 - How To Spot An Abuser On Your First Date - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2007 from Sam VakninIs there anything you can do to avoid abusers and narcissists to start with? Are there any warning signs, any identifying marks, rules of thumb to shield you from the harrowing and traumatic experience of an abusive relationship? Imagine a first or second date. You can already tell if he is a ...
Views: 1085 - The Dynamics Of Spousal Abuse - by Submitted on Dec 11, 2007 from Sam VakninImportant Comment Most abusers are men. Still, some are women. We use the masculine and feminine adjectives and pronouns ('he", his", "him", "she", her") to designate both sexes: male and female as the case may be. It takes two to tango – and an equal number to sustain a long-term abusive ...
Views: 1084 - Domestic Violence Shelters - by Submitted on Nov 25, 2007 from Sam VakninShelters are run, funded, and managed either by governments or by volunteer non-government organisations. According to a 1999 report published by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, there are well over 2000 groups involved in sheltering abused women and their off-spring. Before ...
Views: 1077 - Psychosis, Delusions, and Personality Disorders - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2007 from Sam VakninIntroduction to Psychosis Psychosis is chaotic thinking that is the result of a severely impaired reality test ( the patient cannot tell inner fantasy from outside reality). Some psychotic states are short-lived and transient (microepisodes). These last from a few hours to a few days and are ...
Views: 1075 - Getting Help - by Submitted on Nov 20, 2007 from Sam VakninThis article is meant to be a general guide to seeking and finding help. It does not contain addresses, contacts, and phone numbers. It is not specific to one state or country. Rather, it describes options and institutions which are common the world over. You should be the one to "fill in the ...
Views: 1055 - The Syphilitic Narcissist - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2007 from Sam VakninIt is common knowledge that brain disorders, injuries, and traumas are sometimes misdiagnosed as mental health problems. But what about "run of the mill" organic medical conditions? Syphilis provides a fascinating glimpse into the convoluted world of differential diagnoses: the art of telling ...
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