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Articles from Sam Vaknin | Selfgrowth.com
- The Narcissist in Therapy - by Submitted on Jun 15, 2007 from Sam VakninThe narcissist regards therapy as a competitive sport. In therapy the narcissist usually immediately insists that he (or she) is equal to the psychotherapist in knowledge, in experience, or in social status. To substantiate this claim and "level the playing field", the narcissist in the ...
Views: 1520 - The Narcissist’s Reaction to Deficient Narcissistic Supply - by Submitted on Jan 13, 2009 from Sam VakninQuestion: How does the narcissist react when he fails to obtain enough Narcissistic Supply? Answer: Very much as a drug addict would react to the absence of his particular drug. The narcissist constantly consumes (really, preys upon) adoration, admiration, approval, applause, attention and ...
Views: 5443 - The Narcissist's False Modesty - by Submitted on Apr 14, 2009 from Sam VakninQuestion: I met many narcissists who are modest – even self-effacing. This seems to conflict with your observations. How do you reconcile the two? Answer: The "modesty" displayed by narcissists is false. It is mostly and merely verbal. It is couched in flourishing phrases, emphasised to ...
Views: 5232 - The Narcissist's Grandiose Fantasies - by Submitted on Apr 28, 2008 from Sam VakninQuestion: What happens to a narcissist who lacks even the basic potential and skills to realise some of his grandiose fantasies? Answer: Such a narcissist resorts to deferred Narcissistic Supply which generates an effect of deferred grandiosity. He forgoes his grandiose schemes and gives up ...
Views: 3020 - The Narcissist's Multiple Grandiosity - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2009 from Sam VakninQuestion: Is the narcissist confined in his grandiose fantasies to one subject? Answer: This apparently simple question is more complex than it sounds. The narcissist is bound to make use of his more pronounced traits and qualities in both the design of his False Self and the extraction of ...
Views: 3059 - The Narcissistic Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Aug 13, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Sam V., male, 43, diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) Sam presents with anhedonia (failure to enjoy or find pleasure in anything) and dysphoria bordering on depression. He complains of inability to tolerate people's stupidity and ...
Views: 1373 - The Narcissistic Stalker - by Submitted on Mar 13, 2008 from Sam Vaknin"Such a one (the narcissist – SV) is encased, is he not, in an armour – such an armour! The armour of the crusaders was nothing to it – an armour of arrogance, of pride, of complete self-esteem. This armour, it is in some ways a protection, the arrows, the everyday arrows of life glance off it. ...
Views: 8463 - The Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jul 17, 2007 from Sam VakninDisclaimer The Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Personality Disorder appears in Appendix B of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM), titled "Criteria Sets and Axes Provided for Further Study." Notes of first therapy session with Mike, male, 52, diagnosed with Negativistic ...
Views: 1758 - The Obsessive-Compulsive Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jul 11, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of therapy session with Magda, female, 58, diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD) Magda is distressed when I reschedule our appointment. "But we always meet on Wednesdays!" - she pleads, ignoring my detailed explanations and my apologies. She is evidently anxious ...
Views: 2989 - The Paranoid Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Aug 16, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Dale G., male, 46, diagnosed with Paranoid Personality Disorder (PPD) Dale's first enquiry is whether I am in any way associated either with the government or with his former employer. He doesn't seem reassured by my negative response. He eyes me skeptically ...
Views: 1139 - The Path to Abuse - by Submitted on Oct 02, 2007 from Sam VakninThe abuser mistreats only his closest – spouse, children, or (much more rarely) colleagues, friends, and neighbours. To the rest of the world, he appears to be a composed, rational, and functioning person. Abusers are very adept at casting a veil of secrecy – often with the active ...
Views: 950 - The Psychopath and Antisocial - by Submitted on Apr 22, 2007 from Sam VakninRoots of the Disorder Are the psychopath, sociopath, and someone with the Antisocial Personality Disorder one and the same? The DSM says "yes". Scholars such as Robert Hare and Theodore Millon beg to differ. The psychopath has antisocial traits for sure but they are coupled with and enhanced by ...
Views: 1056 - The Psychopathic (Antisocial) Stalker - by Submitted on Mar 17, 2008 from Sam VakninStalking is a crime and stalkers are criminals. This simple truth is often ignored by mental health practitioners, by law enforcement agencies, and by the media. The horrid consequences of stalking are typically underestimated and stalkers are mocked as eccentric and lonely weirdoes. Yet, ...
Views: 4299 - The Psychopathic Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Aug 15, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Ani Korban, male, 46, diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder (AsPD), or Psychopathy and Sociopathy Ani was referred to therapy by the court, as part of a rehabilitation program. He is serving time in prison, having been convicted of grand fraud. The ...
Views: 1059 - The Relief of Being Abandoned - by Submitted on Oct 17, 2007 from Sam VakninThe dissolution of the abuser's marriage or other meaningful (romantic, business, or other) relationships constitutes a major life crisis and a scathing narcissistic injury. To soothe and salve the pain of disillusionment, he administers to his aching soul a mixture of lies, distortions, ...
Views: 981 - The Schizoid Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jun 26, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with Mark, male, 36, diagnosed with Schizoid Personality Disorder Mark sits where instructed, erect but listless. When I ask him how he feels about attending therapy, he shrugs and mumbles "OK, I guess". He rarely twitches or flexes his muscles or in any way ...
Views: 2671 - The Schizotypal Patient - A Case Study - by Submitted on Jul 11, 2007 from Sam VakninNotes of first therapy session with El-Or (real name: George), male, 22, diagnosed with Schizotypal Personality Disorder El-Or's real name is George. He changed it as a result of an epiphany he experienced at the tender age of 9 when he encountered an alien spaceship in his back yard and "in ...
Views: 2540 - The Somatic and the Cerebral Narcissist - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2009 from Sam VakninQuestion: Are narcissists mostly hyperactive or hypoactive sexually and to what extent are they likely to be unfaithful in marriage? Answer: Broadly speaking, there are two types of narcissists, loosely corresponding to the two categories mentioned in the question. Sex for the narcissist is ...
Views: 11774 - The Spouse / Mate / Partner Of The Narcissist - by Submitted on May 05, 2008 from Sam VakninQuestion: What kind of a spouse/mate/partner is likely to be attracted to a narcissist? Answer: The Victims On the face of it, there is no (emotional) partner or mate, who typically "binds" with a narcissist. They come in all shapes and sizes. The initial phases of attraction, infatuation ...
Views: 6611 - The Stable and Unstable Narcissist - by Submitted on Mar 04, 2009 from Sam VakninQuestion: Is the narcissist characterised by simultaneous instabilities in all the important aspects of his life? Answer: The narcissist is a person who derives his Ego (and Ego functions) from other people's reactions to an image he invents and projects, called the False Self (Narcissistic ...
Views: 7288 - The Stalker As Antisocial Bully - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2008 from Sam VakninStalkers have narcissistic traits. Many of them suffer from personality disorders. The vindictive stalker is usually a psychopath (has Antisocial Personality Disorder). They all conform to the classic definition of a bully. Before we proceed to delineate coping strategies, it is helpful to ...
Views: 1638 - The Syphilitic Narcissist - by Submitted on Jul 31, 2007 from Sam VakninIt is common knowledge that brain disorders, injuries, and traumas are sometimes misdiagnosed as mental health problems. But what about "run of the mill" organic medical conditions? Syphilis provides a fascinating glimpse into the convoluted world of differential diagnoses: the art of telling ...
Views: 1060 - The Three Forms Of Closure - by Submitted on Nov 14, 2007 from Sam VakninFor her traumatic wounds to heal, the victim of abuse requires closure - one final interaction with her tormentor in which he, hopefully, acknowledges his misbehaviour and even tenders an apology. Fat chance. Few abusers - especially if they are narcissistic - are amenable to such weakling ...
Views: 883 - The Three Forms of Closure - by Submitted on Nov 16, 2007 from Sam VakninFor her traumatic wounds to heal, the victim of abuse requires closure - one final interaction with her tormentor in which he, hopefully, acknowledges his misbehaviour and even tenders an apology. Fat chance. Few abusers - especially if they are narcissistic - are amenable to such weakling ...
Views: 852 - Therapy and Treatment of Personality Disorders - by Submitted on May 31, 2007 from Sam VakninI. Introduction The dogmatic schools of psychotherapy (such as psychoanalysis, psychodynamic therapies, and behaviorism) more or less failed in ameliorating, let alone curing or healing personality disorders. Disillusioned, most therapists now adhere to one or more of three modern methods: ...
Views: 1033 - Victim Reaction to Abuse by Narcissists and Psychopaths - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2007 from Sam VakninPersonality disorders are not only all-pervasive, but also diffuse and shape-shifting. It is taxing and emotionally harrowing to watch how a loved one is consumed by these pernicious and largely incurable conditions. Victims adopt varying stances and react in different ways to the inevitable ...
Views: 1569 - Working With Professionals - by Submitted on Jan 29, 2008 from Sam VakninSelecting the right professional is crucial. In the hands of an incompetent service provider, you may end up feeling abused all over again. Go through the following check list before you settle on a divorce attorney, a financial consultant, a tax planner, a security adviser, or an accountant. ...
Views: 1422 - Your Abuser In Therapy - by Submitted on Jan 08, 2008 from Sam VakninYour abuser "agrees" (is forced) to attend therapy. But are the sessions worth the effort? What is the success rate of various treatment modalities in modifying the abuser's conduct, let alone in "healing" or "curing" him? Is psychotherapy the panacea it is often made out to be – or a nostrum, ...
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