Not getting enough attention, spouse cheated, unable to talk about it, feeling uncertain about the future and losing trust. Among these symptoms, many people who are going through this tough situation are wishing for it all to go back to the way it once was.

But now you must stop and consider this, do you really want to turn back the time before this affair has ever happened and would this even be possible?

It's sad when reality hits hard as you realize your marriage will never be the same again no matter how much you wish it could. This is because right now, some of the biggest problems you're facing is not knowing the details of the affair, losing trust and having to deal with those horrible images in your head.

But please be assured, as the healing process can be achievable so long as you shift focus and change your whole mindset. Start to understand that you don't want to go back to how it once was, because if you're marriage was in such a great shape then there shouldn't be any reasons why you're facing this situation today.

The main point I'm trying to raise is that the more you think about how happy the past, how wonderful it felt when the two of you shared high levels of chemistry, the more damaging and hurtful you will feel in the long run. This is because no matter what you do, your mind will take you back to those horrible images of betrayal and mistrust.

The truth is that you don't want to return to the relationship you once had with your partner the same relationship which lead to the point when you're inadvertently setting yourself up for emotional pain. I'm sure you've shared many wonderful memories and cherished moments but constantly romanticizing this past is not going to point you in the right direction you want to be.

Understand that your relationship can never be the same as it once was no matter how hard you try. This is the simple reality, it can't be taken back. No one can pretend an affair never happened, and you will never forget it. The only valid option for you is to make it better than ever before, as sometimes change is necessary for growth.

So what direction should you take and how should you go about making things better? To get to where you want to be you must take this cognitive leap and abandon the notion that's it's possible for your marriage to return to how it was once before.

You need to commit the amount of work necessary for a better future. There are 4 processes you need to work towards to make your marriage better than ever before. Want to know what these are?

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