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Browse published articles attributed to Anne Dranitsaris and Heather Dranitsaris-Hilliard, with full-archive search.
Identifying our automatic thinking usually changes the way we feel and puts us in a much more empowered position to make wise and meaningful decisions. Learning to observe your thoughts gives you the opportunity to recognize the emotional responses you are creating with your interpretation of what is going on.
Many of us have been conditioned to control, ignore or dismiss our emotions rather than use them as a source of valuable information. This leads to what is known as “bucket dumping”. We accumulate our feeling responses inside of us and when full, we dump it on whatever situation or person that happens to add the final drop into the bucket.
Think for a moment of a time when you felt truly connected to yourself – you were on purpose, knew what you needed, had a plan to get it, and felt passionate about doing so. Although many of us have experienced times when we felt we were acting from our true selves, aligned with our interests and passions, they seem few and far between. So why is this and what can we do about it?
When we think about the Socializer Striving Style, with their predominant need to be connected, the Barbra Streisand song "People” (People Who Need People) comes to mind. Socializers are the “Weavers of the Social Fabric” in families, the workplace and in communities. They easily build and maintain positive relationships with a wide variety of people. They aim to be helpful and are enthusiastic, amiable, outgoing “people-people.” Their relationships are at the center of their lives and everything they do ensures their connection to others.
In the absence of being able to express their emotions and connect with the organizational identity, employees are expected to adapt to role driven behaviour. This can result in a decrease in an employee’s ability to contribute anything more than what is defined by the role, leaving both leaders and employees frustrated. In addition the burnout suffered by employees who have been forced into excessive adaptation increases. The only emotions that they are able to express are those required by their roles and acceptable to their leaders.
Leaders are one of the most responsible of all the Striving Styles. When they are fully engaged with the holiday season, they act as though it is their responsibility to make sure everything runs smoothly and everyone has a good time. They work very hard during the season to ensure it does as they get pleasure from and feel most in control when they are working. They are often popular people because they make things happen and will be found where the action is – at family, community, neighbourhood and workplace events.
People need to feel a sense of belonging in order to find meaning in their work and to engage the power of their emotions. The more employees discover links between personal ideals, a meaningful organizational mission or intention, and larger social values, the greater their commitment to their goals. They need to be able to connect their own identify to the organizations intrinsic identity in order to feel a part of the collective. This provides them with a mechanism for the expression of caring about the organization they belong to.r
We believe that through focusing on their personal development, people can learn to handle emotions intelligently, and in doing so increase their ability to succeed in personal and professional relationships. Emotional self-awareness is the core of emotional intelligence. Knowing one's emotional state allows the possibility of expressing feelings appropriately, or making the choice to withhold the expression of the emotion - in other words, managing one’s emotional responses.
What benefit is it to the organization if short-term goals are met but a leader’s behaviour contributes to employee unrest, sabotage, or high turnover with loss of skills and knowledge? Leaders must be aware of how their behaviour impacts on the motivation and performance of their employees. How leaders expect others to behave determines how they themselves act toward them. If they have negative expectations (beliefs) about someone, their behaviour will reflect how they feel, and they are likely to get the behaviour they expect. This, of course, can severely impact performance outcomes.
The way we think about ourselves and how others perceive us can be well-aligned or light years apart. This is often the case for managers and leaders, who can believe that they know what they are doing simply because they have been given the job. They can have difficulty recognizing that what they believe about themselves is very different than the experience of their direct reports, and can have a lot of trouble receiving feedback about the negative impact of their leadership behavior. This is particularly true for the Leader Striving Style.
Organizations have their mission, vision, systems, mandates, values, policies and procedures that ensure they function effectively. They also have their own unique systems and patterns of behaviour and human interaction. This is the dynamic aspect of organizational life, which influences how people feel when they are at work and how they behave because of those feelings. When leaders and leadership groups are not mindful of the emotional life of the organization; when it is ignored and not factored into the other elements of organizational structure, cultural dysfunctions arise.r
Presenteeism is the act of an employee showing up at work without fully engaging their energy, hearts and minds. In many organizations, it is actually the norm. Employees gather around the water cooler talking about what they’re manager is doing wrong, what the company should be doing for them, what a lousy place they live they work in or spending time preparing grocery lists, shopping or surfing the internet, chatting on msn. These are all symptoms of disengagement and emotional distress in the work place.r
Featured in the Globe & Mail business section, Wednesday, March 9th, 2011r
American psychologist Henry Murray (1893-1988) described needs as a, “potentiality or readiness to respond in a certain way under certain given circumstances” (1938). Human needs are the source of intrinsic motivation for all behavior and social interaction. We all have needs that we strive to satisfy in a variety of ways based on a hierarchy of favorite needs. If the conditions are right, and an individual’s dominant need does get met, they are poised for growth and the exploration of how they can seek greater levels of self-actualization.
The Striving Styles Personality System shows how we can take greater control of our mental health. Mental health was originally defined as the absence of mental illness. The World Health Organization defines mental health as "a state of well-being in which the individual realizes his or her own abilities, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to his or her community". Therefore, self-awareness is indeed the key to creating mental health.
By understanding the different needs, approaches, strengths and weaknesses of each of the Striving Styles, the organization can maximize a team’s effectiveness by harnessing the natural energy that is engaged when individuals can meet their own needs through teamwork.
But it takes motivation, determination and discipline to change your brain over time. Most people believe that once you learn something your behaviour should reflect what you know. The brain doesn’t work like that. We have more information than ever before on nutrition and the benefits of a healthy diet, yet more people are obese and fast food consumed in record amounts.r
Collectively, we love to learn about how to improve and develop ourselves. We watch shows, read books, and take courses because we want to learn how to change our behavior. There has never been a time in society when we have had more information about what it takes to maintain a healthy body, have effective relationships and be an influential, effective leader. Yet as a society, we are more obese; divorce is more common that couples staying together, and our children have more learning and behavioral problems than ever before. And we still complain about our leader’s incompetence.r
Our thoughts about the future frequently cause emotions that get in the way of enjoying, appreciating, or participating in the present. Start listening to what people are already saying about the holidays. You hear things like “I am so stressed out about the holidays. I have so much to do.” “I hate the holidays. My family is so dysfunctional.” or “I am so angry because I have to spend so much money over the holidays. I wish it were January.”
Who Am I Meant to Be? Few people dare to dream. To live their lives striving to achieve their potential and become the person they were meant to be. Most people live in survival, as though they have to constantly protect themselves from unseen dangers, even though they don’t exist. Sadly, those who do dare to dream rarely ever see their dreams and ambitions fulfilled as they are not prepared to take risks and move out of their comfort zone. Some research suggests that the figure is as low as one per cent of the population who are becoming the person they were meant to be.
Think for a moment of a time when you felt truly connected to yourself – you were on purpose, knew what you needed, had a plan to get it, and felt passionate about doing so. Although many of us have experienced times when we felt we were acting from our true selves, aligned with our interests and passions, they seem few and far between. So why is this and what can we do about it?
Getting the most this season based on your Holiday Style Do you go into the holiday season full of anticipation and excitement, only to finish up feeling let down and deflated? Are you looking for ways to get greater enjoyment from the holidays and avoid the post holiday depression this season? Not everyone approaches the holidays in the same manner. Each of us has a Holiday Style which determines how we approach it based on our Striving Style. By understanding our Holiday Style, we can ensure we have the best possible experience without any post holiday depression.
The Striving Styles Personality System is based on the premise that if we want to know what we are born for, we must know what we are born as. Too often we are trying to figure out what we are meant to be or do without really knowing who we are. This disconnect causes us to look outside of ourselves for answers to questions that can only be answered from within.r
Theory best comes alive with examples of people demonstrating behaviours and today I have a sample of the Holiday Survival Style of the Intellectual that typifies the behaviour of these people. The social expectations of the holidays cause the Intellectual no end of challenge. Generally introverted and focused more on ideas, information and other mental constructs, having a full month of socializing thrust on them can press their self-protective buttons right from the get go.
If not, do you know what is stopping you? Who is the voice in your head that talks you out of going after what you really want for yourself and achieving your potential? - by Heather Dranitsaris-Hilliard
Leaders no longer have the protection of a structure of given authority behind which their vulnerabilities remain unseen. The new social norms have transformed organizations into social democracies where leaders are expected to reveal themselves and their irrational side to their staff, to enhance their awareness and sensitivity to group dynamics, and to increase their ability to communicate affect. In summary, it requires them to be emotionally astute and self aware.r
The Striving Styles Personality System, an evolution of Carl Jung’s Psychological Type, was developed in 2008 by Dr. Anne Dranitsaris, Ph.D. It is an easy, yet profound way of understanding what motivates different personalities and the predominant need that must be satisfied for them to achieve their potential and become who they are meant to be. It differs from other personality typing methods, such as the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, by getting to the heart of what motivates and drives behavior - need satisfaction and the ability to use emotional energy.r
The Striving Styles System goes deeper than other systems of typology by looking at the predominant needs of each of the Styles and how they behave when they are self-actualizing and self-protecting.r
I don’t think any of the Striving Styles embrace the spirit of the holidays more than the Performer. Everything from the enjoyment of shopping to organizing and attending social events brings them an opportunity to get their need for recognition met. They are truly energized by making the holidays exciting for others while at the same time, enjoying the limelight when they do it.