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Articles by emma-viglucci

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By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Your Mindset is Ruining Your Life...

Do you find that you have so many demands and responsibilities calling for your attention and resources that sometimes you feel like crawling under a rock and going to sleep for a millennium? Do you find that everyone wants a piece of you? Your kids have practical, social, intellectual and emotional needs. Your home needs tending and your family life has a ton of minutia to be managed. Your social calendar, extra-curricular activities and other commitments grab at you at every corner. Your job, business, or profession takes the bulk of your attention and energy.

Primary topic: Codependency

895 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Numbing for coping with stress specially during the holidays…

The Holiday Season is here! This time of year is usually challenging regardless of how crazy the world is out there. What makes this season usually more challenging is that we trip into it and get sucked into the hecticness. This sets us up for chaos, being stretched too thin, overwhelm, drama, and too much noise. Where we end up neglecting, and even abusing, ourselves trying to get it all done or managing what comes up... This is the perfect formula for us to turn to numbing for coping with stress during the holidays…r When we turn to numbing, we actually make things worse…

Primary topic: Codependency

883 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE

Does it feel like we are turning a leaf to you? It feels like that to me, so grateful, though we are still dealing with significant restrictions around here. I know some are feeling burnt out with all pandemic related topics and impact. I know some are enjoying aspects of the temporary new normal. I know some are still getting their bearings as this thing threw them for a loop. I know some days are better than others. I know most are wondering what the future brings…

Primary topic: Codependency

880 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

From Desperate Anger To Blooming Passion

The season of renewal is finally here and with it comes an invitation to awaken to life. Note the blue skies, the sun shining, birds chirping, flowers blooming. What an enchanting time to be alive. The possibilities are countless.

Primary topic: Codependency

880 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

DOMESTICITY IS KILLING YOUR RELATIONSHIP

Partners look at what they contribute to their joint life as what they contribute to their relationship. These things usually include earnings and taking care of the family and home. But, what would you say you contribute to the relationship if you couldn’t include these? How do you invest in becoming a better partner? How do you nurture your partner? How do you nurture the relationship? How do you invest in feeling each other and creating intimacy? How do you invest in enjoying each other?

Primary topic: Codependency

878 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

GIVING, MEANING AND SUCCESS

Giving in whatever manner tickles our heart is a significant path to feeling happiness. Our Giving doesn’t just touch others’ hearts and maybe even meet their needs with our gestures. Our Giving is also good for us. The act of giving and being generous stimulates the same neural network that light up when we feel physical pleasure… This week gives us a great opportunity to Give in additional ways. #GivingTuesday has become a significant part of the holiday experience. Did you participate yet? What causes are dear to your heart?

Primary topic: Codependency

878 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Get back your connection and intimacy

Couples that are experiencing a low in their relationship usually refer to it as having communication issues and not getting along. They bicker and fight, fights escalate and then there is shutdown, they don’t see eye-to-eye and can’t seem to get on the same page, they struggle to get their needs met, everything is a tit-for-tat or keeping score, and they just can’t enjoy each other. They feel disconnected and alone. Intimacy is but a faraway dream. Does this resonate for you? Are you wondering how to get back your connection and intimacy?r

Primary topic: Codependency

877 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HOW TO GET MORE LOVE FROM YOUR PARTNER

We are just days away from Valentine’s Day. Are you embracing the Love Month? Is your whole house decorated pink like mine is? Haha, just kidding! You believed that though, didn’t you? Yes, I’m known to be a hopeless romantic and to love the Love Season. Yes, I love the pink and the red. And yes, I love the cliché things about VDay. I don’t love the commercialization of it, and when I encourage clients, subscribers and followers to embrace VDay I’m not referring to this aspect of it. I’m referring to taking advantage of this opportunity to play with Love. Why not?

Primary topic: Codependency

877 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

ARE YOU ACHIEVING YOUR RELATIONSHIP GOALS?

Mid-March – how about them apples? Times flies when you are having fun, or are too busy! LOL Hopefully it’s the former for you. How is it going? Having a good week? Having a good month (March can be rough on people)? Having a good quarter…? As we are quickly approaching the end of Q1, this is a perfect time to check if we are on track for the year. This might be tough to face if you were slow getting started with your new year’s strategy.

Primary topic: Codependency

875 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

How to Get Support from Your Partner

When couples struggle it is very common to find that the partners have not yet found a way to honor and support each other in genuine, compassionate and generous ways. Partners share that they have tried it all and are tired of not getting anything back, getting their needs met, nor being able to create an awesome relationship. They participate in their relationship with an ego (fear-based, selfish, and self-centered) approach. These partners have difficulties letting go and trusting their partner.

Primary topic: Codependency

874 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HOW TO GET OVER WINTER BLAHS

I like to get into Spring Mode early to extend the warmer seasons as much as possible… It’s harder to do when the weather wants to continue to show its winter colors though. LOL But it’s nothing that a Spring Bucket List can’t fix! Are you with me? Let’s leave winter behind regardless of what is happening out there. I did some research on Spring Bucket Lists to prepare for this issue and found most of them a little basic and dull. I think you and I can create our own much better list. Are you up for it?

Primary topic: Codependency

873 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Can You Change Your Partner?

Many couples operate under the assumption that being in a relationship means to be bossed around, told what to do, and to loose their personal freedom and choices. I have heard references to young couples getting engaged as “he bit the bullet” and other similar degrading remarks. I’m sure you have heard before couples complain about how their partner wants to change and control them and references to partners being “trained,” “whipped,” “on a short leash,” etc. All these really set up the stage to struggle in one’s relationship.

Primary topic: Codependency

871 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

IS LACK OF TRUST AFFECTING YOUR RELATIONSHIP?

Is lack of trust undermining your connection with your partner and wrecking havoc in your relationship? Lack of trust might extend to beliefs that your partner is cheating. Or it can be as simple as not trusting your partner to be there, follow through, keep their word, be accountable, get your back, do the right thing by you, be mindful, thoughtful, and honorable. The level of distrust has to do with our own insecurities, but also the level of our partner showing up authentically. When we both address our side of the coin this becomes a non-issue!

Primary topic: Codependency

871 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Stop Sabotaging Yourself!

Have you noticed that when you are really close to what you want or to the next level in your life, things seem to go wrong?

Primary topic: Codependency

870 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

ARE YOU ABANDONED OR SMOTHERED IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP?

Couples get stuck in how they relate in their relationship and no matter how they try to get unstuck, to meet their needs and to create a satisfying relationship, they just get more and more buried in dissatisfaction.

Primary topic: Codependency

862 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

ARE YOU BEING NEGATIVE?

Have you noticed that whatever you are dealing with, more of it shows up in your life? It can even start to feel like the universe is playing a joke on you. Have you had that experience? Of course, it’s awesome when this applies to good stuff in our lives. Not so much when the repeating item is frustrating, painful or generally negative.

Primary topic: Codependency

862 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

3 STEPS TO YOUR NEW YEAR STRATEGY

How are you doing? Hope you are keeping the momentum from the New Year going… As I’m sure you already know, right about now people start floundering with their New Year Resolutions, Intentions and the like… Tomorrow is the 3rd Monday of the New Year and known as Blue Monday… The end-of-year drive, the holidays merriment and the new year’s excitement all but come crashing down… This is when back to reality hits us like a ton of bricks.

Primary topic: Codependency

860 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HE KEY IS YOU 2.0…

As we witness our country get ravished by this pandemic, and what seems the worst is yet to come, we have to prepare to weather the storm. To ride the wave… To make sure we can hang on to hope, to see the light at the end of the tunnel, and to look for the silver lining… I know it’s very challenging to do that as things get worse.

Primary topic: Codependency

860 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

ARE YOU ALL IN YET?

Have you gotten over yourself, evicted your Ego, yet? Are you full steam ahead? Are you all in? Are you fully committed to really giving it your all, to throwing your whole Self in? Are you fully committed to kicking some serious butt, to creating an extraordinary life and awesomest relationship? Do these questions scare you? Do you feel a wave of terror cursing through your body? Do you feel your insides shaking? Do you feel frozen or paralyzed? Do you feel like a protagonist in a film playing in slow motion, or like you are walking in molasses?

Primary topic: Codependency

858 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

ARE YOU YOUR OWN WORST ENEMY?

Something that is amazingly striking is how vulnerable we are in all aspects of our humanness. And, how hard we can be on ourselves (and with others!) to top it off! In the stories I hear through the work, and also in plain old conversations with people, I hear the constant criticism, lack mentality, negativity, focus on what’s “wrong”, and the like. Gosh, it makes for an awful stay in that mental space rental. LOLrnr

Primary topic: Codependency

857 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

IDENTIFY YOUR VALUES FOR MORE HARMONY AND JOY

Often times we say we want to do such and such, make this change, implement a new habit or routine, yet we don’t follow through or stick with it. This is because we are grabbing ideas out of thin air as they sound cool or as a result of a frustration. The impulsive nature of this approach almost guarantees we won’t stick with the idea. Regardless of how ingenious and awesome it is. To make changes and create what we want, we have to be driven by our Values.

Primary topic: Codependency

856 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

4-WEEK GRATEFULNESS LUNCH SERIES

As we welcome the month of Thanks Giving, I become more aware of my own Gratefulness Practice. I become more attuned to everything I’m Thankful for, and specially for what I might have been taking for granted. There is so much to be thankful for!

Primary topic: Codependency

854 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

5 WAYS TO THRIVE THIS SEASON

Let’s get ahead of the impact of the end-of-year hecticness by instead of anticipating stress, overwhelm, exhaustion, conflict and the like, and going into survival mode, let’s plan on Thriving during this time. Eh? The trick is to believe that this is possible, that you can do it and that you can do your life differently for more Peace, Joy and Abundance… Yep, change doesn’t just happen you have to be intentional about it… Here are options to consider playing with to help you get traction on this Path of Ease…

Primary topic: Codependency

852 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HOW TO CRUSH TRANSITIONS

Oh boy, it’s that time of year when transitions are most prevalent. How do you manage transitions? How do you gear up for new phases, stages, developments, plans, routines, opportunities, seasons, and such?These show up in all areas of our life. Some of us do better than others at managing transitions well. Leaving something we know, or love, for something new is not always easy. Peeps who experience ADD have specially challenging times with this – switching gears is not easy.

Primary topic: Codependency

851 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

DARE TO DREAM...

Did you know that an important part of the Human Experience is Dreaming? And, I’m not referring about the dreaming we do when we are sleeping. Dreaming, having a vision, aspiring for something, yearning… This is what drives us forward and keeps us motivated… This is what keeps us engaged and Alive… This is where there is juice!

Primary topic: Codependency

850 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

IS YOUR BRAIN WORKING FOR YOU OR AGAINST YOU?

Unfortunately I get to see how partners get in their own way when trying to create connection and intimacy with each other. I can hear the noise in their head. I can see the wheels turning. I can see the gears grinding. I can see the squirrels running around, some even holding on to nuts for posterity… I can see the wreckage. I can see the black hole. I can see their pain. If there was a device I could put on to see in their head, I would get these images. But wait, there is a device that can see in our heads, that measures brain activity…

Primary topic: Codependency

850 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Uniqueness and Richness in Your Relationship

We bring a lot more into our relationship than we are aware. We are unique human beings with a unique set of history, parenting, socialization, wounding, and experiences. As we develop and journey in our lifetime, our uniqueness plays a role in all we do including how we relate to our partner. One of the characteristics that make us unique is our sense of our self. According to Harville Hendrix, author of Getting The Love You Want, our True Self, our original whole being we were born with, has been compromised over time just by the mere fact that we live in an imperfect world.

Primary topic: Codependency

845 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

SHOW-UP TO YOUR RELATIONSHIP AND REKINDLE IT TO LIFE!

It is just the way it is for some couples. After a while they can’t feel their partner. They don’t feel loved and actually believe their partner doesn’t care about them. They feel like just roommates, two ships passing in the night. Others don’t even see each other at night! They spend so little quality time together that they forget to show up to their relationship!

Primary topic: Codependency

836 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Use Self-Care as Your Way to Higher Abundance

Abundance in our life is experienced in direct proportion to the level of Self Love and Self Care we give ourselves. Take a moment to soak that in. When we are stingy with our Self, our energy vibrates at a lower frequency which attracts other low frequency people, situations and results in our experience. This ranges from having your driver’s license suspended, to a tree falling on your house, to going bankrupt, to a family member becoming seriously ill, to you becoming seriously ill, and even death.

Primary topic: Codependency

836 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Get along, get on the same page, get things done

Unfortunately, the feeling of being stuck and feeling hopeless in one’s relationship is not uncommon. Many partner’s feel they are not compatible, they don’t enjoy each other’s company, and can’t see a future together… A sad state of affairs. Partners get to this point because they get entrenched in their own perspective losing sight of the other and the relationship, and the gorgeous potential... Once this is recaptured, they get along, get on the same page and get things done... They move forward creating their successful and radiant relationship!r

Primary topic: Codependency

835 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

IS YOUR PARTNER ALWAYS LATE?

I have found that most relationship issues can be boiled down to taking personal responsibility and setting effective boundaries… This includes showing-up to our interactions appropriately by being intentional, mindful and compassionate. It doesn’t do anybody any good to show-up by ramming ourselves down others’ throats… That’s not actually showing-up… This is disrespectful and a boundary injury…

Primary topic: Codependency

835 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HOW IS YOUR SELF-DISCIPLINE?

Sometimes we forget, or give up on, what we want to do… Sometimes we get side tracked or distracted and can’t seem to get traction… Sometimes we are afraid to follow are dreams… We believe we don’t have what it takes, and thus hold ourselves back. Can you remember a time in your life when any of these happened for you. Part of the reason this happens is because we don’t have enough personal ownership and self-Discipline. Because I knew I was getting ready to be ready (LOL) for this big project, I chose the Focus Term™ Discipline for myself when I was doing my year-end Strategizing… Eh?

Primary topic: Codependency

833 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

BREAK THE BARRIER TO CONNECTION

In most relationships usually one partner wants more closeness and togetherness than the other. The partner that wants the togetherness and closeness derives their safety, meaning, and joy from being in relationship and in connection. They are the ones that do the “relationship work”, make the plans and keep the social calendar, they make sure everything in the home runs smoothly and that everyone has what they need, and are the ones that need to be in “touch”. When this is disrupted in anyway they don’t feel safe, confortable, grounded, happy, important or valued.

Primary topic: Codependency

832 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Freedom, Perspective & Choice

We leave freedom and independence to be celebrated on the 4th of July, and for politicians and policy makers to worry about. But freedom is a gift that should be treasured, cherished and protected in all contexts, especially in such an intimate and influential relationship in our lives such as our relationship with our partner. In our relationship, the ability to exercise our freedom is key to our and our partner’s wellbeing and that of the relationship. Without freedom your true authentic selves can not be in relationship and the relationship can not flourish and be satisfying.

Primary topic: Codependency

832 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

3 Tactics to increase connection in your relationship

I love new beginnings whether it’s a new year, a new season, a new chapter, or just a nice and simple refresh and reset… I believe these are amazing opportunities to take stock and plan anew to keep evolving and expanding ourselves and upleveling our life. This applies to all areas of our life, from personal to relationship to professional/business. A refresh and reset are great when feeling off and looking to increase connection in your relationship.r

Primary topic: Codependency

831 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

ADDICTIONS IMPACT MENTAL HEALTH AND SUCCESS

I’ve had an interesting coming together of influences this week to inspire today’s topic (in the end only a minor detour from our Editorial Calendar). I had a request to write about addiction, and of course today is World Mental Health Day… So, I’ve decided to combine these and write about them in our usual context… [If you are in immediate need of assistance, please refer to the Hotlines provided here] There are a number of addictions that impact our Journey. The most common addictions that you might be familiar with, and possibly even have in your own life, include:

Primary topic: Codependency

831 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

End-of-year closure, clearance and celebration (Step2)

Yes, 2020 has been challenging. Yes, 2021 seems to want to start on a rough foot also… But we don’t have to let it! It is our job to create our best life regardless of what is happening out there, to the best of our ability… Today’s topic is the second step in putting a bow on it and launching into the New Year with pizzaz. I’ll cover how to do closure, clearance and celebration for paving the path for the new year.

Primary topic: Codependency

830 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

The secret to cultivating resilience

As we are transitioning into Back2School and the Busy Season, we are to step up our game to keep up with the faster pace, fuller schedules, and additional demands. And, as we are trying to rescue what’s left of 2020... Yet, we are going into the season already exhausted, depleted, and burnt out. Our surge capacity lasted only so long… Now we have to recharge ourselves to beat this draggy feeling and to turn this thing around. The key is in cultivating resilience.

Primary topic: Codependency

830 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Have Your Ideal Partner by Creating Balance in Your Relationship

A crippling state in relationships is when partners can’t seem to get each other and get on the same page. Partners struggle with being themselves, seen, accepted, recognized and embraced. I find when couples struggle is because the partners are having a difficult time honoring themselves and each other… The partners get busy trying to be seen, acknowledged, get their needs met and have their way that they lose sight of the other and shoot themselves in the foot with their approach. They encroach on their partner bringing about the opposite of what they are actually seeking.

Primary topic: Codependency

828 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

YOUR PARTNER NOT MEETING YOUR NEEDS?

Life is gorgeously full and a consistent invitation to approach what’s important with intentionality, ease, presence, and mindfulness. For in how we carry ourselves impacts the experiences we create, and the Journey we live… It is up to us to make it a good one every day. How do you measure your daily success?

Primary topic: Codependency

825 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

CHANGE YOUR REPEATING PATTERNS AND STUCKNESS!

Last issue covered aspects of Communication (from Element2-Communication & Alignment in our Successful Couple Strategy™), the prior covered Boundaries (from Element1-Context & Mindset)… Communication is such an important part of a successful relationship. It is a very basic skill that most partners botch in their relating. They are not aware of all the different things that impact their communication and getting on the same page. They are left butting heads and hurting each other instead of really getting, accepting and supporting each other.

Primary topic: Codependency

821 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HOW TO WALTZ INTO THE NEW YEAR!

Wow, the year is almost over! Here is a recap of the Season’s focus. In case you missed it, you might want to take a look at these to see what still applies and what you need to embrace to gracefully waltz into the New Year! Intentionally Plan Your Holidays And Year-End (setting up your HYP) Acknowledge And Celebrate Your Accomplishments (ASPECT 1 of HYP) Letting Go, Productivity And Meaningful Holidays (ASPECT 2 of HYP) Giving, Meaning And Success (ASPECT 3 of HYP) Giving To Yourself For Ultimate Success (Reinforcement for HYP)

Primary topic: Codependency

820 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

HOW TO CREATE MEMORABLE TIMES

Why do couples struggle enjoying downtime and having fun together? As we know, opposites attract. This phenomenon is also found in couples which means that usually partners have opposite personalities, needs, wishes and preferences – including what they consider relaxing, enjoyable and fun. This does not mean that your leisure time, your Summers or vacations are doomed. This does mean a need to intentionally plan your time together so you create a win-win experiences.

Primary topic: Codependency

819 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

CHANGE STARTS WITH YOU…

Are you victimizing yourself, or are you being proactive in your life? Pick something to take charge of, to focus on, and Focus on it till you get the results you want… Let’s do this! This applies to anything in your life, obviously your relationship as well… As I usually share, partners have a tendency to focus how their partner is being, how their partner is thinking or looking at something, how their partner is feeling, what their partner is doing, how their partner is spending their time, how their partner is grooming, how their partner goes to the bathroom (sarcasm)…

Primary topic: Codependency

817 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

Holidays thoughts stressing you out?

We know the Holidays and year-end can be stressful and triggering. We deal with this every year. But now we have the added pressure of a raging pandemic added to the mix. We have the sensitivities and aftermath of a close and tumultuous election. We have the flavor of what 2020 has been hanging over our heads. Hey, it makes sense that holiday thoughts are stressing you out, probably a lot more than usual.r

Primary topic: Codependency

815 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

20 RELATIONSHIP ENRICHMENT TACTICS YOU NEED

What positive and healthy tactics have you embraced recently that are having a good impact on you? That are allowing you to be your Best Self? As you might know, when we show up with the best version of ourselves, we can conquer anything… This includes creating our radiant, authentic and successful relationship. What does showing-up with our Best Self mean? It means we embrace a Relationship Enrichment approach, we: Set empowering effective boundaries so we honor ourselves and don’t get in each other’s wayr

Primary topic: Codependency

814 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

9 TACTICS FOR WEATHERING YOUR QUARANTINE

It is a crazy time in the world, and it behooves us to take care of ourselves well to properly weather this storm and come out as unscathed as possible after this is over. Let’s make smart decisions and set ourselves up to actually thrive. Yes? Let’s do this also! The coronavirus pandemic is impacting every thread in the fabric of our lives from where and how we work, to how our kids are educated, to how much internet bandwidth we need, to what food we have available, to how we entertain ourselves. Even to how much toilet paper we have to wipe our butts. LOL (a little humor never hurts!)r

Primary topic: Codependency

814 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

SUCCESSFUL COUPLES’ BEST PRACTICES

I love observing couples. I’m always intrigued by how they operate, especially if it works for them. I’m always learning from the couples around me. I’m in awe and inspired by couples that are dedicated and devoted to making their relationship work better. I’m honored to work with the partners I work with. Their commitment to their relationship and each other is unparalleled. I love working with them. Sometimes though, the things that partners tolerate surprise me. And, the things they find egregious doubly surprise me.

Primary topic: Codependency

813 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

IS THE DANCE OF CONNECTION & DISCONNECTION DRIVING YOU INSANE?

I’m a therapist… I’m a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. I’m a Certified Imago Therapist (additional training in doing couples work). Hence, I specialize in working with couples. I’m often asked what’s my niche, what’s my thing… I specialize in working with codependent couples (partners having poor boundaries and self ownership…). And, I further specialize in working with couples where apathy is ramped in their relationship. Where one partner is not involved, withdrawn, removed, difficult to engage, self absorbed and such.

Primary topic: Codependency

812 views

By emma-viglucciRecently published1 topic

End-of-year vision, strategy and intention (Step3)

Wow, we made it. The end of 2020… And, what a year it has been. Are you excited to close what some are calling the “lost year”? I actually refuse to look at it this way and choose instead to look at it as a Transition Year into our Best Self, Best Relationship and Best Life… To that end, we’ve been closing and letting go of 2020, and getting ready to properly set up 2021. Today we’ll do the last step in this process: End-of-year vision, strategy and intention…

Primary topic: Codependency

811 views

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