SelfGrowth.comThe Self Improvement Guide

About Professional DashboardDashboard Browse Topics Create Professional AccountCreate Account

Home/
Articles

Browse SelfGrowth articles

Loading the searchable article library…

SelfGrowth.comThe Self Improvement Guide

Explore experts, guides, articles, videos, and events by topic.

Explore

All topics Experts Guides Articles Videos

Platform

About SelfGrowth Websites Newsletters Events Become an Official Guide Contact

Compliance

Legal

Privacy Policy Terms and Conditions Cookie Policy

Your choices

Privacy Requests

Help improve SelfGrowth

Accounts

Personal account Create Professional Account Become a Contributor

SelfGrowth helps readers explore personal growth topics with clear paths into guides, experts, and related resources.

Home/
Experts/
Joyce Shafer, Book Doctor/
Articles

Articles by Joyce Shafer, Book Doctor

Browse published articles attributed to Joyce Shafer, Book Doctor, with full-archive search.

articles: 195

Explore

TopicsBrowse every topic ExpertsFind people ArticlesRead guidance WebsitesOpen resources EventsSee sessions VideosWatch clips

⌕

SortRecommended Most viewed Most recent Highest rated Alphabetical

Showing 1–50

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Feed Negativity?

When negativity knocks at your door, do you recognize it and send it away? Or do you invite it in for dinner, or worse, to stay with you as long as it likes—possibly for your lifetime? First, be clear that being the manager of negativity in your life isn’t about the fact you have negative thoughts or feelings—you will. It isn’t about eliminating negative thoughts and feelings so you never experience them again—that’s not realistic.

Primary topic: Empowerment

5,249 views4.1/5 (25)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Causes Negative Thinking?

Do you ever wonder if or wish there was an On-Off switch when it comes to negative thinking? Maybe if you know what causes it, you can find the switch and flip it.

Primary topic: Empowerment

9,049 views4.5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Does Feeling Overwhelmed Really Mean?

There are two types of overwhelm: the type that’s triggered by exte al events and the type you self-impose. Both can be managed with the same technique. “I’m overwhelmed,” was my client’s first comment. You’ve been in that state of mind, and so have I. And, that’s what’s important to understand—overwhelm is a state of mind, not an actual event.

Primary topic: Empowerment

6,803 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Are the Differences Between Soul Needs and Ego Needs?

We are souls in physical form, and we have an ego that is meant to serve us in specific ways. Frustration happens when we get their needs confused (or ignore them) rather than have them work together. Let’s look at some ways to differentiate between ego needs and soul needs.

Primary topic: Empowerment

5,965 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Is a Short Temper Fuse Really About?

We all experience having a short fuse at times, though some seem to have this more often. What’s really going on; and can two simple methods make a difference? Thoughts that motivated my recent article, “Do You Experience Mixed Feelings About Being Patient and Tolerant?” didn’t stop when I typed the last word. I’d likened getting to the end of your patience or tolerance to a glass filling with liquid until it spills over. It’s the same with losing—or loosing—your temper.

Primary topic: Empowerment

5,068 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

The Power of a Firm Decision

Whatever you believe is involved in improvement or success, the power of a decision is key. It will help if you understand what this really means.

Primary topic: Empowerment

3,891 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Life Coach, What Is Unique About You?

You may have learned the same skills as your peers when you trained, but what is unique about you? What do you do or offer (or would like to) that’s different? Mike Litman said, “Your prosperity is hidden in the problem you were born to solve.” It’s not only about what is unique about you, but what you’d like to be unique about you.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,604 views4.3/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Rub Your Thoughts the Wrong Way?

There is a phrase, “That person rubs me the wrong way,” that basically means the person (though it also could be a situation) doesn’t make you feel good. You, at times, do this with your thoughts (most of us do); so what works to shift this? Esther Hicks of Abraham fame has a video on YouTube, “Now Is Where All Your Power Is, Part 2,” where she likens feeding negative thoughts—any thoughts that take you out of feeling good—with rubbing your hand on sandpaper.

Primary topic: Empowerment

3,227 views4/5 (3)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Feel You Lack Direction in Life, Business, or Retirement?

When you feel you lack direction in life, business, or retirement, it’s frustrating. It doesn’t have to be this way, if you have two things clear in your mind. You feel you lack direction if you don’t have a destination point envisioned in your mind. A destination point, in this context, is a specific desired result—a vision of what that ideal result is. There are several things that hold people back from putting time into their vision for life, business, or retirement:r

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,999 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How Do You Listen to Yourself?

It can be amazing to listen to how people talk about their perception of reality. You can literally hear how close they get to a point that would allow shift, but stop short. I had dinner with a friend I hadn’t seen in a long while. As he told me about things that were different, it was easy to hear that he and his beliefs were pretty much the same, which means his experiences haven’t changed much.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,978 views4.2/5 (5)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How Can I Identify My Life Purpose, True Goals, or Bucket List?

Is there really one question or method that can help you answer each or all three of these questions? Let’s find out. First, a few thoughts about each . . . Life Purpose

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,721 views4.5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How to Write (and Market) a Quality eBook

An e-book can satisfy your desire to write, act as a business building tool, and provide true value to others in many ways. There are guidelines should you use to guarantee its quality. Here are several key points you want to use to improve or guarantee value for readers. Consider them before you write or type the first word of your e-book or any other product you intend to sell to or share with readers. While you read these, notice how they apply to how you can market what you offer more effectively, as well. You’ve decided on your topic.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,125 views4.3/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Every Fear Hides A Wish

This title is a line of dialogue from a movie I recently watched. I shared it with a friend who emailed back, “What does THAT mean?” I suppose it could mean we wish the opposite of what we’re afraid of were true instead. If we fear instability in some area of our lives, perhaps we wish ...

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,842 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How do You Grade Your Worth and Self-Worth?

Have you ever thought about how the way we’re taught to measure worth and self-worth is similar to how we got tests graded in school? There is an interesting parallel. The school grades you received for tests measured, in a limited fashion: how well you took tests (often designed to be tricky), memorized, understood (or liked, from your side of things) what you were tested on, and—though more from your perspective than the system’s—whether or not you believed you’d have a use for the information now or in the future (felt it was applicable to your life experience or goal).

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,757 views3.6/5 (9)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How Well Do You Cope with Change?

There are two types of change to be aware of—the type you desire and the type you don’t. Do you feel you manage yourself well enough through these? Do You Want Your Life to Be Different? If you desire change in some area of your life, the first thing that must change is whatever in you prevents or delays your desired outcome. Inevitably, your desired outcome is to feel the way you wish to feel about whatever it is that has your attention. What are some ways you prevent or delay desired change?

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,749 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Be True To Yourself

All of us have moments when we find ourselves at a crossroads and we’re not positively certain which path to take.. We may turn to family or friends for their thoughts and ideas. This is good if what you’re doing is looking for something akin to brainstorming for things to consider. Some who are ...

Primary topic: Empowerment

3,910 views4/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How Would You Answer This Simple Happiness Question?

Do you ever compare where you are now in your life to where others are, or to where you thought you should be by this time? If you do and don’t feel happy, the question and comments here may help. I have a friend who recently set up a Facebook page and began to reconnect with long-lost friends, learning who was doing what now. She shared that temporary depression settled upon her, as she compared her life now to the lives of some she connected with. I say “temporary” because she eventually realigned her true feelings about this.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,727 views3.7/5 (7)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do Writers Really Have Blocks?

What does your block look like? How does it behave? Here are some tips to help you kick the “buts” about blocks. I don’t believe in writer’s block, just the fact that one or more questions need to be asked; and, relaxed patience is needed while the answer comes to you. When I attempted my first book, I went back and forth about how to present the information; and did this for two years. I made numerous lists of what I wanted in the content, mind-mapped, and used a lot of paper.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,377 views3.4/5 (5)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do These Time Wasters Affect Your Life?

Activities we usually name as time wasters are too much TV viewing, daydreaming, or anything that isn’t a productive use of minutes and hours. Here are a few more to consider. Gossip. What’s the point, really? Conveying needed information to the appropriate person or people is useful, but negative gossip is a misuse of time and energy; and as Gandhi said, a form of violence. Each of us does the best we believe we can to make our way through our lives and challenges even if others don’t see it that way.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,213 views4/5 (3)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

How Do You Clear Your Inner Space?

Wouldn’t it be great to be able to point at and click a Delete button at what clutters your inner space? Our days would be so different if we could.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,170 views4.5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Is Your Core Safety Switch That Stops Your Success?

You may have a core “switch” set to keep you safe. What if self-sabotage is actually your switch doing its job? Maybe it’s time you give this a closer look. You can apply what follows to any area of your life where you feel attaining success is a struggle, but let’s start with money/wealth/abundance—whatever your word choice is . . . because money has such highly-charged emotional, self-worth, self-esteem attachments to it. Let’s imagine you don’t have the financial situation you’d prefer—but you really want it.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,436 views3.6/5 (9)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Struggle With Feeling Authentic?

Do you carry the feeling of not being your authentic self or living authentically, and a fear of doing so? If your answer is yes, here are two significant causes for this you need to be aware of.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,734 views5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

One Reason Your Nagging Issue Seems Hardest to Resolve

This particular reason keeps the same problem or problems around far longer than you ever imagined they would be. It’s also what contributes to your feeling stressed, exhausted, frustrated, and why little to no lasting progress is made, no matter what you do. Think of one issue you’ve been personally struggling with for a while, say, five years or longer. It might be money, weight, health, business or career, or something else (more about what the real issues may be in a moment).

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,721 views5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Is Your Gift, and Do You Share It?

Your gift is what you do in your unique way. Ironically, you may do it so naturally, you don’t recognize it for what it is or realize what you might do with it. Whatever you do in life, you can have a more joyful, meaningful experience if you shine the light on and share what is unique about you. We sometimes assume the way we do something is how everyone does it. This isn’t necessarily, and usually isn’t, the case. This is why something you do that you don’t think is very special or unique might be seen as very special or unique by someone else.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,368 views4.2/5 (6)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Is It Time You Write to Make a Difference?

Are you a life coach (or not) who toys with the idea of writing articles, e-books, and/or books? Don’t let a block stop you from making a difference; someone is waiting to hear from you. Imagine receiving emails that say something like “I had a breakthrough when I read your article.” (from a reader) “Your articles are so good I have difficulty choosing which one to use.” (from the editor of a monthly newsletter) “I recently re-read your book and had a major shift about a life-long issue.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,251 views3.5/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Possess Your Life or Do You Endure It?

Here is a partial line from a P.D. James novel: “. . . preserving always the same look of puzzled acceptance of a life which had to be endured rather than possessed.” Do you possess or endure your life (or any part of it) at this moment? Every day, each of us endures something, even if inconveniences of greater or lesser magnitude—considering some endure much more than most of us will ever have to think about or ever want to. If you find you face a challenge or situation you believe you can do nothing about, take possession of it, meaning take possession of how you relate to it.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,524 views4.7/5 (3)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

You Reached Your Goal So Why Do You Feel Less Than You Anticipated?

You pick a goal and hit it. You’re supposed to feel good or great, even amazing—but, you don’t. Hmm . . . You followed the formula: picked a goal, made a plan, worked your plan. You succeeded, but you don’t feel the way you thought you would. What happened? You aimed at the wrong target. Here are three ways that can happen. 1. You set a goal based on a “should,” whether you “should” on yourself or someone else did. You did everything required, rang the bell and got the coconut—but you really desire an apple.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,653 views3.8/5 (5)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Keep Beating the Same Drum?

Have you found a philosophy or technique you believe will lead you where you want to go: specific feelings and desired outcomes? It takes a while to realize you can’t get there, unless you travel the path to that destination. So much of what we do is habit we don’t recognize it for what it is. This is especially true with thoughts, words, and actions. What kinds of stories do you repeat to yourself and others? Are they ones you want to experience, to encourage?

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,892 views4.5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Does Your To-Do or Goals List Overwhelm You?

Lists are handy to help you stay organized. But, what if your list leads you into overwhelm instead of focus, achievement, and fulfillment? One of my newsletter readers emailed that he was not able to focus or move forward on any of his goals, and included a list of almost thirty items he’d written down for himself, and added there was more not included. He felt overwhelmed, and this left him stuck in place. I looked at the list and immediately saw why he felt this way.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,487 views4.3/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

The Power of Choice and What You Choose

What we choose not only influences us in the moment, but beyond it. How well or often do you practice the power of choice?

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,960 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Is Self-Esteem an Issue for You?

Are you a member of the Low Self-Esteem and Self-Worth Club? What you’re about to read may inspire you to cancel your membership.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,470 views5/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Is the Only Thing You Have Absolute Control Of?

Did you get the answer to this question immediately? Horace said, “Life is largely a matter of expectations.” Expectations have a lot to do with the one thing you can control. There is one thing in life you have absolute control over: Your attitude. An excellent quote to remember is, “Pain is inevitable; suffering is optional” (Bruce Schneider, Founder/Director of iPEC). A fact of life is that pain visits all of us at one time or another. What we choose to do with it shapes who we are and our life experiences.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,914 views3.5/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Your Focus Equals Your Commitment

If you ever feel your focus is faulty, check your commitment. But, also look at what else is going on in your life.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,883 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do We Teach People How to Treat Us?

We can teach others how to treat us, but others also reflect to us how we treat ourselves (self-value), which is often a more subtle dynamic. Do you see how this creates a loop? Let’s bypass childhood and more extreme scenarios, as both of those are different conversations. Let’s consider you’re an adult living a non-extreme life.

Primary topic: Empowerment

2,319 views3/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

The Challenge of Proof of vs. Faith in Infinite Abundance

If you’re not experiencing infinite abundance, there’s a good reason it’s not your “reality” yet. The reason relates to a riddle. The challenge is like the riddle: which came first, the chicken or the egg? In this case it’s which comes first, measurable proof that you’re infinitely abundant or faith that it’s your natural state? The answer for both riddles is the same: the thought or idea of it comes first. We entangle ourselves with a “chicken and egg” cycle about infinite abundance.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,772 views4/5 (3)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Is Mainstream the Wrong Stream for You?

For many, mainstream is like a tailored suit; for some, it’s like a straightjacket. Are you swimming in the wrong stream or against the current? Mainstream, in this writing, means demonstrating via your life, work, relationships, etc., an “acceptable” model or role model, as much as possible—a model that is allowed some leeway as long as it’s a composite of descriptions provided by the various prevalent social, religious, and educational systems and models, as well as family and cultural descriptions or models.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,592 views3.3/5 (6)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

5 Questions to Help You Become Your Authentic Self

It’s a complaint you and many others may share: I don’t feel authentic! These 5 questions can help you change this. If you feel inauthentic, you already know how painful that can be. If you’re a people-pleaser, you know how painful that can be, too. If you feel the real you lives behind a façade, or worse, you aren’t even sure who the real you is any more, use these five questions to shake your authentic self loose from the ties that bind it. I got the five questions from Jairek Robbins, who got them from someone else… and they are powerful!

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,804 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Practice Self-Help or Shelf-Help?

You invest in a book or program to improve something about you or your life. Do you take what it offers as far as is appropriate for you or as far as the bookshelf? Does this pattern show up in other areas of your life? We all have things in our lives we move forward on with no problem, others we drag our feet about, and those we hesitate to or never take the first step towards. It’s beneficial not to judge our process, but assess it and our outcomes often; it is imperative we participate in it willingly. I spoke with a man who doesn’t like his job (six-figure income) or his life.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,440 views4.3/5 (3)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Experience Mixed Feelings About Being Patient and Tolerant?

Patience and tolerance are behaviors and states of mind to practice, right? How well do you do with them? Questions about Patience and Tolerance came to me after I spent extended time with someone who couldn’t seem to talk about anything that wasn’t unpleasant. All of us need a dose of healthy venting at times; but what I mean here is non-stop negative chatter about anything and everything, not conversation about a specific matter that genuinely needs attention or compassion. If such chatter goes on overlong, I get the heebie-jeebies.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,723 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Is Someone Telling You That You Are Broken?

Do you have a person in your life now (or did) who frequently tells you what’s flawed about you or broken? Do you believe him or her? What might be going on with them, and you? "Handle them carefully, for words have more power than atom bombs." - Pearl Strachan Hurd I want to share a personal story with you in case you’ve ever experienced something similar or are doing so now. For a time, I had a person in my life who I knew from the start was there to allow me to learn something.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,566 views3.8/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Does Gender Influence Prosperity?

True prosperity represents well-being in all areas of our lives. We know men and women are different, but we didn’t know one particular difference affects their prosperity attraction quotient. Ellie Drake of BraveHeartWomen and Dr. Sugar Singleton hosted a teleconference that was as riveting as informative in its explanation of what they call the prosperity hormones of men and women. More information will be offered here, but one of the most obvious means to see and feel this difference is to compare marketing pieces you receive from men and from women.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,960 views4/5 (2)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Confidence Is and Is Not

What do you believe confidence is? Maybe you’re right, and maybe you’ll be surprised.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,680 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Self-Sabotaging Behavior is About

Self-sabotage is not about lack of willpower; so, you can stop beating yourself up about that one. What it is about may surprise you… and empower you. Self-sabotage happens when you confront the need to move out of your comfort zone to improve your life experience or make a dream or goal happen. This is one reason willpower doesn’t work. A few words about willpower…

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,670 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Is Your Focus on the Target or the Prize?

The article title asks an important question. The one you focus on has everything to do with not only your outcome but your experience reaching it.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,626 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Push When You Could Ride?

It happens to all of us when we desire to fix, change, or shift something: we push when we could ride. What’s that really about? Years back, the guy cutting my hair told me about a conversation he’d had with a co-worker. She had complained that her father had used the push lawnmower on their acreage when he could have used the riding mower. He told her, “That’s how you live your life.”

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,619 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Has Approval Been Your “Currency” Exchange in Life, Business, and Relationships?

All the strategies, systems, programs, books you’ve invested in that haven’t shifted your prosperity or life experience may have missed one key point. You may not realize approval, rather than value-for-value, is your imprinted “currency” exchange. Expectations and limiting beliefs introduced to us in early years become invisible residents in our non-physical “bones.” They also morph—change form and function—as we grow into adults.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,479 views3.8/5 (4)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Everything Has a Reason and a Season

Trees don’t try to keep their leaves when autumn arrives, nor do they resist new growth in the spring. But, that’s how we sometimes approach our lives. Life asks, insists really, that we engage a continuous shedding and new growth aspect. Maybe you’re trying to hang onto something it’s time to let go of or trying to change something not ready to shift just yet.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,603 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Do You Feel Authentic?

Do you ever feel afraid to be as you are? See if actor Patrick Stewart’s story and these comments help you think or feel differently about this. Tavis Smiley interviewed Patrick Stewart (Captain Picard in Star Trek: The Next Generation). The topic of Stewart’s famed hairless dome came up, and Stewart revealed he was as bald by age nineteen as he is today; and that for years, he wore a comb-over. His defining moment came after lunch at the home of a Hungarian black belt Judo player, who was also a director, and his wife. The couple left the room—Stewart thought to make coffee.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,601 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

What Key Ingredient Is Needed for Joy?

You can choose joy as easily as you can choose any emotion. But you won’t enjoy your life as much as you could unless you include one key ingredient. Do you enjoy what you have: your key relationships, material items, spiritual awareness and connection to Source, personal traits and characteristics? If you can’t enjoy who you are and what you have now, how will you enjoy even more? This may seem contradictory but it isn’t. It reminds me of two thought streams: “Wherever you go there you are” and “I’ll be happy when…”

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,574 views5/5 (1)

By Joyce Shafer, Book DoctorRecently published1 topic

Why Should A Life Coach Write?

How and what do you feel when a writer shares an insight or technique that creates a desired shift for you at the inner and/or outer level? Exactly! You’re reading this now, which means you have a desire to provide a similar experience for others through your unique offering: articles, e-books, and even books you may write. We life coaches feel deep motivation to assist others to self-empower.

Primary topic: Empowerment

1,705 views3.7/5 (3)

Page 1Next page

Back to top ↑