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Browse published articles attributed to Joyce Shafer, Book Doctor, with full-archive search.
I wish I’d coined the phrase, “Success comes in Cans.” Its accuracy was on my mind as I spent time with two people in Can’t Mode. One of them was open to reframing thoughts and statements; the other was not. One is currently in a funk and has been paying rent to live in Funkville for a couple ...
Is your tendency to believe greatness has to look a certain way? Does this belief hold you back from your true greatness? Your greatness is unique and reveals itself at the right time. You might as well be excellent until you’re great. But first, understand what this means. What your ...
Fear is natural and necessary. Why? It helps keep us safe. But, fear is supposed to protect us from danger, not keep us from living fulfilling lives. My Life Coach training was through iPEC (Institute for Professional Empowerment Coaching). Bruce Schneider, founder, presented keys to success ...
The Law of Attraction states that whatever we hold our focus, specifically, our emotionally-charged feelings on is what we get more of even if it’s not what we desire. It’s easy to relate this to a better job, more money, and all the improvements we typically seek to expand into our lives. If ...
What might life look like if we held the belief that there are no mistakes? For some, this concept is, well, inconceivable. At first blush, it may even seem as though it excuses every thought, word, and action. Not really. A friend of mine once said, “I’m beginning to believe the only thing to ...
When something goes missing, do you lose your cool or move to Plan B? Saturday morning, I woke to find myself unable to access my email account. Any of you who actively use your email for professional and personal reasons might identify with what I might have felt at that moment. And when a ...
In four days, I’ve watched “The Secret” four times, though definitely not my first viewing. I mentioned this to a friend who responded, “I heard the secret is never actually revealed.” I think the reason some people feel the secret isn’t blatant has to do with the fact our brains don’t respond ...
Confucius said, “It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness.” Some might consider the quote’s candle a metaphor for the word “hope.” It could be that. It could also be trust in whatever we believe is larger than ourselves; a small action taken on our behalf as opposed to ...
Part of my ritual is to write the same I Am statement 20 times in order to focus on what’s intended, claim it, and do so until it’s the result that’s lived. Rather than doing this by rote, I allow my mind to engage with what’s taking place. I listen to what’s happening at the inner level as I ...
Ahhh...the confusion about Law of Attraction, affirmations, ask/don’t ask...these things do swirl around in our minds. Can you really get the hang of using this Law so it works for you, and release doubts and fears? Of course. What are some of the things we need to know or remember in ...
We tend to think of time wasters as too much TV viewing, daydreaming, or anything that isn’t a productive use of minutes and hours. Here are a few you may not have considered. Gossip. What’s the point, really? Conveying needed information to the appropriate person or people is okay, but ...
Do you know the quote, “If you do what you’ve always done, you’ll get what you’ve always gotten?” A preacher’s wife restated this in a way that made me take notice. Once again, I woke and channel surfed to the early-mo ing religious program. A preacher interviewed his wife; and though I’ll ...
Meaningful life lessons are sometimes derived from unusual or unsuspected methods and revealed many years later. Recently, an image from when I was twelve years old came to mind. It was the first year a local elementary school held a weekend carnival. The usual junk food booths were there; but ...
I did my daily practice of walking to the waterfront to sit on a bench and let go of thinking, as much as possible. My mind (like many others) is usually a-whirl with thought, so deliberately letting go for a period of time is beneficial. Then I decided to add something I never though of before: ...
Ah...to live a dog’s life. While in the park, I saw a young girl walking her miniature dog. Something caught its eye that I couldn’t see yet because shrubs blocked my view. The dog would surge forward, barking non-stop at the top of its miniature voice, and the leash would pull it back. I ...
It’s believed best not to look back to move forward; but if you do this wisely, it can make a difference. Pick an issue . . . any current issue that has your attention by the, umm . . . balance point. Underlying this issue is a belief you have about it, a belief that’s not serving you. Take a ...
Musing about why people sometimes settle for less in their lives, I wondered if one cause might be because they (we) feel unprepared, unable, or afraid, for some reason, to give more? Those who fit into the category of over-givers (usually poor receivers) might mutter at me as they read this, ...
Mainstream comments and thoughts make it easy to think of the economy as something separate from individuals and communities, which is not true. Here are a few ideas about this. My opinion is that the reason the economy appears as it does right now is because some forgot something basic: Many ...
The first step towards a balanced life is to become clear on what it is that you really want. If you’re like most people, you tend to think that what you want is a thing like a house or car, a relationship, a particular job, or—fill in the blank. You may believe if you have the thing(s) you ...
Are you a peach attempting to grow in a banana field instead of an orchard? On a whim, I placed one of the extra copies of my book, “I Don’t Want to be Your Guru, but I Have Something to Say,” in the laundry room of my building. A woman I speak with every time we meet up was who found it, and ...
I live in a quiet building in a quiet neighborhood. Awakened at 4:15a.m. by a racket, I couldn’t help but notice it was unusual. A couple was engaged in a squall and had no qualms about sharing it with neighbors when they took it into the hallway. Based on what I overheard, if that relationship ...
“A crisis only becomes a breaking point when we fail to use it as a turning point,” wrote Guy Finley recently. His words, words of others, and inspirational and funny videos that began to fill my in-box were responses to a silent request I made the other day when I came face-to-face with an ...
Ever have one of those moments, events, or days when it appears if it can go wrong it seems to? Were you pleased with how you managed yourself, and the outcome? The event was one I not only looked forward to, but carefully planned for. My handouts, business cards, and artificial bonsai tree ...
A funny thing happened on the way to writing an article about Gratitude. I changed my consciousness. For quite a while, I’ve been attaching "I am grateful for"in front of all of my affirmations. I had heard, and accepted, the words of others who spoke about the importance of gratitude. But ...
It may seem like we’re watching things crumble and tumble around us. What if we, even as and especially as individuals, now stand at the threshold of expanding our personal power and potential, no matter what? What if expanding this inner power is the very thing we should do? Are you ...
We love a good story, told well, that entertains us. But there are some who use stories for a different purpose: Justification for why they aren’t in control of themselves and, therefore, their lives. I have a call scheduled with someone who wants to tell me her story. Basically, she hopes ...
An agenda that lists things to get done is terrific; but that's not the kind of agenda this article is about. I recall being angry with someone, so angry in fact, that I harbored that feeling for a long time. My attention to this was triggered when I faced a particular challenge after the ...
I once heard the affirmation, “I am always in the right place at the right time.” I added “with right action” at the end. I used it for the travel aspect in making my transportation connections and in general over this past weekend when I visited a friend. I’d had a somewhat exhausting week and ...
I don’t want to make a unilateral statement, but in my life, solutions are not always obvious. I recently read a parable many of you probably read a long while back called, “The Prisoner in the Dark Cave.” A man sentenced to death is placed in a dark cave. He’s told there is a way out and if he ...
“Bill, you asked me if I was just traveling or if I was on a journey. Aren’t they the same thing?” n “Not at all, A. J. Not at all.” “And the difference would be...” “When people are just travelin, they start out with the notion they’re gonna end up someplace by a certain time. They get ...
Mid-January, I posted an article, “Success Really Does Come in Cans,” where I mentioned conversations with two individuals. One was a Can’t-Do person; the other was a Can-Do type. I haven’t heard from the former, but I heard from the latter. She called to say she was utterly confused and ...
During a conversation with someone who wishes to move out of a lifetime of negative behaviors and beliefs, I realized as she spoke, that what it takes for her to feel better is for something outside of herself to improve or indicate a circumstance is getting better. Anyone even minimally ...
“He who asks questions cannot avoid the answers.” Cameroon Proverb My friend and I talked about what’s next for him. His story is, indeed, part of history. Years ago, he easily earned a million a year in the entertainment industry. Then his head and heart alignment about his work went out of ...
You’re in the driver’s seat, cruising on the highway, headed to your next destination. The rules of safe driving recommend you occasionally glance at your rearview and side-view mirrors so you know what’s going on around you, but your primary focus is on what’s in front of you. It’s obvious you ...
Two days before I realized the New York City marathon is this weekend, I re-visited a technique I used back around the late 1980s, where I’d write or type questions and wait for answers to flow through my fingers. Neale Donald Walsch had the idea to share his use of this technique, and the rest ...
Maybe you’re like me and you’ve been diligent about letting go of limitations in an area or areas of your life. You’ve experienced and continue to experience the shift as a result of your focused thoughts, words, feelings, and actions. Though I’ve been working with this for years (okay, ...
I spoke with a friend who just started a new job she doesn’t like. She really wants to start her own business doing something she’s very good at and enjoys. It’s not a matter of figuring out what it may be, she already knows and has done it in the past. During our conversation, she wanted to ...
“You are old, Father William,” the young man said, “And your hair has become very white; and yet you incessantly stand on your head—do you think, at your age, it is right?” (From the works of Lewis Carroll) George Berkeley said, “Our youth we can have but today. We may always find time to grow ...
There are times when what others say or do triggers us and we feel a need to comment or even rant. Can we do this better, from a place of personal power? You bet. Any time we speak about others, no matter what we say, we speak loudest about ourselves. This realization came to me after a ...
In the universe, matter and anti-matter exist. In equal amounts, they cancel each other out. If there’s a greater quantity of one than the other, that’s the one that “wins.” Though there are pockets of anti-matter in space, there are more elements of matter or nothing would exist. A parallel ...
Maybe what’s going on in the economy has nudged or forced you to consider how you can amp up every area of your business. Maybe this was on your mind before the shake-up, which has become a catalyst for shift sooner than later. You’ve probably heard some say that this is actually a time of new ...
Choosing happiness when its not your habit is like the old joke about how you eat an elephant cone bite at a time. A friend shared she finds it challenging to switch from negative, unhappy mode (usual habit) to positive, happy mode (preferred habit) and gets frustrated when she feels anything ...
I use a three-day process when I feel or see a shift in my life and don’t want to jump without knowing where to jump. I state that between that moment and the end of the third day, I‘ll absolutely know what to do; and then I Put It Down, metaphorically, and do and think about other things. This ...
The New Year is around the corner and a time we consider new beginnings or fresh starts in one or more areas of our lives. A good way to get into this is to see if there’s any outer or inner clutter that holds us back. Oute n*Do you search for items you use every day like keys? How much time, ...
Recently, I read an article that was based on questions stated by two lead characters in a movie. The male lead was fretting over changes and pending changes in his life, and kept saying to his wife, “What if it all goes wrong?” Her response was always, “What if it all goes right?” I’d had a ...