Dear Dr. Romance: Why Can't I Spark the Interest of a Woman?
Dear Dr. Romance:
Browse published articles attributed to Tina Tessina, with full-archive search.
Dear Dr. Romance:
When life hands me a very difficult time, and I feel defeated and overwhelmed, I enter a hopeless and helpless state of mind I think of as The Little Orphan girl. This is the way I felt, as a teen, when I lost nearly my whole family, father, aunts and uncles, between the ages of 12 and 18. Needless to say, I was devastated; and I also survived and eventually, thrived. But little orphan girl doesn't remember that I made it through she sinks into despair.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance:
It's not easy to know what to do when you have a friend who seems depressed. Dr. Romance has some guidelines to help you support and care for your dear one. 1. Don't try to cheer your friend up. It just sounds like you don't understand. 2. Listen, listen, listen: Your friend needs someone who can hear whatever the problem is. It doesn't matter if it seems like a small or big problem to you, it's overwhelming to your friend, and he or she needs to talk about it. A lot.
The average person pays more attention to what she's saying or thinking about than what she is hearing, or how her words are "landing" on the other person. This self-involvement gets worse during an argument. You can become a much more effective communicator by using "attentive speaking" a simple and highly effective technique that will help you pay attention to how well you're communicating, whether it's with your partner, your children, or extended family, or co-workers.
Dear Dr. Romance: I was browsing the net and came across one of your articles "No Strings Attached Sex" which I found very interesting as it relates to a situatio I am facing currently.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: To be honest I think she is really scared to go to therapy I have been many times And I know it works And I really want her and I to learn how to communicate stumped Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: My partner whom I have been in a relationship with for the past year has changed and let me down twice. We were first friends for several years & became a couple for the last year. We both fell in love instantly and desire to live together to build towards a good future, financially, & with family. We both have children from past relationships & are content with it.
Narcissistic Personalities & Sociopaths Conscience is a type of judgment, that tells us what is right and wrong. It begins in early childhood, when (hopefully) parents teach a child what he can or cannot do (beginning with "no!"), then gradually how to tell right from wrong. Conscience-building continues in Sunday School, regular school and within the family and the neighborhood. We learn what's right and wrong on a personal level, a spiritual level, and a social level -- if we wrong our friends, they leave us.
If you read this Dr. Romance blog, you know that I am always talking about the importance of good communication, urging better communication, and giving skills for being better understood. Communication is one of the most important aspects of relationships; positive and negative. However, talk is not necessarily communication; and there are lots of non-verbal ways to communicate.
Although most people in the country wouldn't agree, we in Southern Califo ia have been having extreme weather conditions for us: rain and mudslides. You could almost say we're so used to mild conditions that we become afraid of what others would call "real" weatherweather wimps.
Dear Dr. Romance: I'm a high school assistant and I fell in love with mother of one of my students. She doesn't know anything about and has some difficulty with her son's wife. I told her I want to help you to sort out your problem, but I have no idea how to help her and how about my love how do I forget it that she is married and I am single. Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance: I am living alone. I've been told I am sexually week. Can I have a life partner? How long will it take? I need care and protection, and to know what my choices are. How can I be fruitful to society and mankind? Is my life worth anything? Tell me the truth. Believe me I can keep my cool. I am mentally stable and happy. Dear Reader:
Dr. Romance writes: In my clinical experience, I've encountered many clients who are afraid to admit they're wrong. This comes from a culture of blaming and accusing -- where one's early family may have picked a "culprit" when something went wrong, and focused on blame, rather than on fixing the problem and healing the hurt. People with such experiences approach every situation as if they're on trial, and they compulsively try to convince everyone they're not guilty. They have no patterns to follow for apology and forgiveness.
Dear Dr. Romance: My husband had a one night stand several weeks ago. He told me about it. We've been going to counseling for several months and were doing great. We just found out she's pregnant. I love my husband, but can I work through this?
Dear Dr. Romance
For quite a while now, we've heard many public figures, like Rush Limbaugh and comedia Bill Maher express sco about people who are politically correct. Maher even gave his show the very funny title "Politically Incorrect." Terms like "the PC police" were used to laugh at people who were perhaps a bit strident about defending the rights of small groups of people. The hip-hop "gangsta" culture has been anything but PC.
This arrived in Dr. Romance 's e-mail:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: I read your article on yahoo about older woman dating younger men. Well I'm the opposite, you said on your article at the end "What really makes a romantic relationship succeed is the emotional connection." If this is true then I think my relationship would work out, I don't know.
Dear Dr. Romance: We are co-workers and I've know him for about two years. He's very nice, funny and in very good shape. We've built a pretty solid friendship. We hang out a couple times a month (when I'm home from school). But, lately he's been pushing for a relationship (seeing as how I'm graduating next year).
Dr. Romance writes: Early in our marriage, after a difficult struggle between us, I gave my husband Richard a card. All over the front it said, "I love you," and inside it said, "It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it." That phrase has carried us through many difficult times since.
Dr. Romance writes: Richard and I have been married since 1982 It hasn’t always been easy, but it’s definitely been worth it. In the first year of our marriage, after a difficult struggle between us, I gave my husband a card. On the front it said, "I love you", many times, and inside it said, "It's a dirty job, but someone has to do it." That phrase has carried us through many difficult times since. We have kept our love alive, and the joy of this relationship carries us through the rest of life.
Dr. Romance has had many clients who are grieving, and wrote this to help. None of us wants to think about it, but the standard definition of a totally successful relationship is the old, traditional "til death do us part." Any time we love, whether it’s a life partner, a dear friend, a child, a sibling, a parent or even a beloved pet, we are risking the loss of that love.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dear Dr. Romance: As a woman in my early twenties, I am finding it hard to get over a man with whom i have been in love with for 5 years. He is married now to another woman and they are about to have their first child. Seven years ago, I joined a church choir where i met this man. He gives me and some other choir members car ride every Saturday and Sunday to church.
In romantic depictions of love, cute little images of cherubs and cupids abound. But Cupid, in his real inca ation, is not so sweet and cuddly. His arrows can create deep and lasting wounds, and can strike you blind and irrational in a heartbeat. A few disaster-filled run-ins with Cupid's dart and you can readily believe that love will never work for you.
Dear Dr. Romance: I've just gotten my girlfriend pregnant and still have doubts about my sexuality, whether I'm gay or bisexual. She wants me to get some clarity before she decides to keep the baby or not. Can you help? Dear Reader:
Dear Dr. Romance:
(To view video, click here.) Moving in together is a financial commitment, and so is marriage, so it’s important to consider the tough issues you’ll face as a cohabiting or married couple. Dr. Romance presents seven things you should consider before entwining yourselves financially as well as emotionally.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance has had many clients who are grieving, and wrote this to help. None of us wants to think about it, but the standard definition of a totally successful relationship is the old, traditional "til death do us part." Any time we love, whether it’s a life partner, a dear friend, a child, a sibling, a parent or even a beloved pet, we are risking the loss of that love.
Dear Dr. Romance: I just found your article "Without Ego" Omg you are just who I've been looking for. For the past two years I've been reading articles about dissolving the ego and all this hubbub. For those two years I was told that I have an ego that is all about self, cannot exist with love, is self draining, and only thinks about itself, and it was inside me!!!
Richard and I just indulged in our favorite December tradition—we watched our favorite Christmas movie (Scrooge! the musical starring Albert Finney) which kick-starts our holiday spirit every year. No matter what you observe: Ramadan, Kwaanza, Chanukah, Solstice or Christmas, this is a celebratory time of year. For some it's a joy, for others a nightmare, and pressure to spend too much, eat too much, and socialize in ways you don't like. If your Holiday expectations are out of line with what you can really accomplish, you'll be stressed.
It’s not the first thing everyone thinks of, but the existence of an out-of-wedlock child will have a big economic impact, and the financial responsibility will grow with the child. 1. Unless you can settle with the child’s other parent out of court, court costs can be very expensive.
Dear Dr. Romance: I have read your article "Fair Fight Guidlines" and it is impressive. I like to ask your advise for the following situation:
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes: Many of my clients want to know: What is a safe surrender to love? They have been in love before, and have gotten hurt. While we all are aware of the joy and beauty of love, and the profound pleasure of being in love, most of us are also afraid of mistakes, of making a wrong decision.
Dear Dr. Romance:
Dr. Romance writes: There was a time when life seemed very hard, so hard I tried not to think about it.. Several times I helped to destroy some very viable relationships. Changing myself, my life and my loves has been very exciting and fulfilling, yet I am still growing. Love Styles is intended to help you reach your desired destination on your own journey and make your hard places a little easier.
In this tougher economy, couples are finding it necessary to take the jobs they can get, and that means more couples work different shifts. If one of you works a “graveyard shift” or rotating shift job that limits your time together; the difference in your shifts and commutes may mean you actually get to spend very little waking time together.
Many people ask me, "How will I know if I'm in love?" Answer: Anyone who's in love usually knows it; the real question should be are we mutually in love, or am I wasting my time? If you want to be secure in your primary relationship, knowing how to create mutuality and work together greatly increases the chance that you'll make it as a couple. When I'm counseling couples on the verge of divorce, it's amazing how establishing mutuality allows the love to come back. Mutuality Prevents Heartache
Dear Dr. Romance: