***How To Build A Self-Confident Life!

Do you like you? What do you really think about yourself? Do you feel assertive, optimistic, eager, and able to accurately assess your capabilities? Do you consider yourself worthy, loveable, and likeable? Are you the person who sets and accomplishes his or her goals? Your self-confidence determines your success or failure in every aspect of your life.

Luckily, even if your self-confidence is on the ground, there are many ways to become a confident leader in your own life. One place you can begin building self-confidence is in your thoughts. For example, we are all capable of holding negative thoughts about ourselves, such as - I'm fat, I'm helpless, I can't change, I'm not good enough, I'm unworthy, etc. These negative thoughts, repeated over and over again, create a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Confidence comes from a strong and healthy sense of self. It refers to having a positive and realistic perception of yourself and your abilities. If you are used to thinking negative thoughts about who you are and what you are capable of, realize that you can end that 'stinking thinking' and add some self-supportive talk into your inner dialog. Recall the computer expression, "Garbage in, garbage out!" If you allow only negative thoughts in, your life will reflect this negative energy. You are the one person who can toss out the old garbage. Once you decide to carry out the garbage, the next step is to begin creating confidence, self-esteem and success. You can do this by choosing to think about yourself in a whole new way. Here's an exercise to help with this process.

Almost everyone has seen or heard about David Letterman's nightly "Top 10" lists. Well, right now you are going to take a few minutes and formulate your own "Top 20" list. Create a conscious listing of your positive traits and abilities. Or, perhaps of the positive traits you admire in others and wish to have for yourself. Making a list of your positive qualities isn't a new idea. Numerous self-development speakers and trainers have utilized this technique. However, this exercise has stood the test of time and if you will benefit from participating in this exercise. Here's how it works.

On a sheet of paper, make a list of 20 positive things about yourself. There's no need to rank each item in a specific order - just jot them down as they come to you. If you get stuck, you may want to ask your closest friends or loved ones to help you. They may see the truth about who you are more clearly than you do.

Your Strengths and Positive Qualities
Write your list now before continuing with this article. Here are some positive qualities to stimulate your thoughts.

Smart...Thoughtful...Intelligent...Independent
Successful...Optimistic...Focused...Objective
Compassionate...Loving...Non-judgmental
Understanding...Sensitive...Outgoing...Cheerful
Warm...Radiant...Energetic...Reflective
Affectionate...Passionate...Articulate...Expressive
Genuine...Honest...Gentle...Kind...Decisive
Vibrant...Spirited...Bright...Perceptive
Brave...Determined...Peaceful...Confident
Willing...Spiritual...Patient...Learning
Friendly...Organized...Educated...Athletic
Motivated...Punctual...Influential...Charismatic
Fearless...Persevere...Acceptance...Strength
Spontaneity...Balanced....Assertive...Optimism Eagerness...Pride...Emotional maturity

Your "TOP 20" Positive Qualities List

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Now that you have accomplished this exercise, ask yourself some questions. Did it take long for you to complete this list? Would it have been easier and quicker to come up with 20 things you disliked about yourself? Did you stop writing before reaching 20? How did you feel as you were doing this exercise?

This exercise is an excellent way to assess your current level of confidence. You can't realize your potential or enjoy life fully if you won't recognize your positive traits. Decide that it is time to stop battling with yourself, or always putting yourself down. Success will never come from disowning your strengths. Stand up before yourself and declare that you are not weak. You are not inferior. You are not inadequate. These false beliefs can be put out into the trash, and new beliefs can take their place.

If you completed your list of 20 items, congratulations! If you didn't finish the list, why not go back and do it now? When your list is complete, don't throw it out. Refer to it often . . . discipline your mind to focus on your own positive qualities and watch your confidence take a few steps up.