Adapt or die (the perrils of the comfort zone)

DEFINITION OF INSANITY.
Doing the same thing
every day of every month of every year, EXPECTING A DIFFERENT RESULT.

When I received the statement above (a Chinese proverb) from my friend Mario
(Huge Computers) it made quite an impact on me. So much so that I started investigating why we don't change and move out of our "so called" comfort-zone.

I deliberately used the words "so called", for every year the seasons changes from summer to winter forcing us to change. Also when circumstances forces us to change we quickly make the change, less we perish. These are mere acts of survival. But we do change when forced to do so. The ability to change is within each one of us.

What then stops us from deliberately moving out of our personal comfort zones to explore a wider world filled with adventure and fortune?

My research shows that people don't want to change for real simple reasons. And the number one reason is habit. Pre-programmed routines drilled into us from childhood. We are not necessary comfortable where we are, but through habit, it is all that we know. So we stay in the familiar condition through habit.

The 2nd biggest reason people don't change is fear. But what causes the fear? I think it has to do with self-image. The lower the self-image the less we will step out and do what we really want to do because we imagine we will be ridiculed or stomped upon by our peers and society.

As children we were told not to dream , "to get real", "to get back to earth" "don't be ridiculous" "what on earth were you thinking" and this conditioning causes us to stagnate. Unless we can fix our self-image, even if we do step out to achieve, the self-image will always regulate the measure of our success. Like a thermometer in an air-conditioning system it will always level your achievements out to the level of your self-image.

And finally the 3rd reason people avoid change is often plain common laziness. The only cure for this is to get active. If you suffer from this problem you are lucky. It is easy to cure.

And now for the paradox..

Moving out of the comfort zone and a little bit of achievement can do wonders for the self-image. So we are in a catch 20 situation. What is required is a bold move to take the first step, and then the next. Once inertia has been beaten it will become a lot easier and even a little success and achievement will do wonders for the self-image.

As we try new things, we gain confidence. Confidence makes us feel powerful and good. And when we are confident that we can survive new ideas, we allow ourselves to try even more new things. We develop a better self-image. And that is the foundation of all success. But the core, the deep down image we have of ourselves will not allow us to continue to excel beoynd this level unless we fix it.

If that’s all there is to it – if a little step outside your comfort zone is all it takes to grow and improve, then why don’t more people do it? What makes that little step so difficult?

The answer is simple, we don't like pain.

You see, the second you leave your comfort zone, you experience pain and discomfort and . Since all positive changes take place outside the comfort zone, change is painful. The very instant most people feel the pain, they pull back inside the comfort zone. This is the reason why most people fail to improve themselves or create lasting changes in their lives: They are unwilling to put up with the pain of change.

The pain we’re talking about may be the emotional pain of feeling awkward and clumsy at doing something new , or it may be the “pain” of discipline and sacrifice.

The statement “no pain, no gain,” has been perverted, criticized and labeled as nonsense. The people doing the criticizing are almost always “comfort zoners” who haven’t achieved much with their lives. The old rule applies. Never follow the herd (unless you want to step in a lot of manure). Instead, follow the small percentage of people who step out and achieve great things. All great things on this planet has been achieved by those who were willing to step out.

Brian Tracy says, "90% to 95% of people will withdraw to the comfort zone when what they try doesn't work. Only that small percentage, 5 or 10 percent, will continually to improve themselves; they will continually push themselves out into the zone of discomfort, and these are always the highest performers in every field."

Many of us prefer to stay in the comfort zone and then, over time, the comfort zone becomes more uncomfortable than ever before. How ironical! The act of avoiding what should be done, or what is desired, offers a temporary sense of security which becomes a source of insecurity. And, thus a condition of worries, anxieties and phobia sets in. The life in the comfort zone will become a life of regret. regret that we did not do the things we wanted to do.

If you don't step out of your comfort zone and face your fears, the number of situations that make you uncomfortable will keep growing. Over time, you run the risk of feeling surrounded by previously avoided situations. To live a balanced, happy life you must love yourself. And it will almost be impossible to love yourself if you start accusing yourself of "if only I did this", "why did I not take the chance when I could?" Regret is a killer.

No one has ever achieved anything without first tackling tasks that are difficult for them.

"A man grows most tired while standing still"
- Chinese Proverb -

"You will never change your life until you change something you do daily."
- Mike Murdock -

As always, my sincere wishes for a great life.
And you are welcome to flame me if you disagree with me. I am also learning what you are learning, so there is great room for improvement in what I think.

Theo
Pistorius
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© 2004, Theo Pistorius.
You are welcome to copy and publish my articles as long as you give me credit and point your readers to http://www.devox.co.za