A matrimonial divorce settlement is NOT an exact science. If a financial divorce settlement was a straight mathematical equation, we wouldn't need courts and lawyers to resolve matters. Courts are usually required, under Family Law legislation, to take into account a range of factors in deciding who gets what. Too many women settle for a 50% split of the matrimonial property WITHOUT taking into account matters such as significant disparities between what your husband earns and your own weekly /monthly income and any restrictions your age or health might have on your capacity to earn income.

Another mistake is letting the other spouse retain the matrimonial home EVEN IF you have the ability to buy him out. Real estate property has a habit of increasing in value without you having to do anything. If you pass this up and your spouse pays you out then the problem often is that you don't then have enough money to purchase a property of your own. Deposits, stamp duty, legal fees etc. can put buying another home out of your reach. You're left paying out dead money in rent.

While not as common a mistake, some women will seek to keep the matrimonial home when they really CAN'T afford to financially. If buying out your husband's share in the house is going to involve you taking out a big loan, you need to factor in the monthly loan repayments PLUS outgoings such as rates, building insurance, public liability insurance and general maintenance costs. Only then will you know whether or not you can actually afford to keep the house.

Failing to take other matters such as alimony and child support into consideration BEFORE agreeing on a division of the matrimonial property is another problem. These are NOT matters that should be dealt with in isolation.

It is the current value of property that is taken into account - not replacement value. This means that if the family car is worth $10,000, it is often better to keep it. Too many women find themselves needing a vehicle to get the kids to and from school, football training etc. and having to spend twice what the family car was worth just to replace it. The same mistake is sometimes made when it comes to the marital furniture and effects. They are usually secondhand (even if only recently purchased) and therefore are not worth a lot of money. For example, the fridge that you paid $1,000 for new may now only worth a few hundred dollars. Keeing the bulk of the furniture (if it is in good condition) will avoid you having to pay a lot more money to replace it.

Property settlements may sometimes be amicable but this does not mean they are fair. Do not accept the inflated financial values your husband is likely to put on property that you want to keep and the low value he's likely to put on any property he actually wants to keep.

It is surprising to find women (and sometimes men) arguing over the little things. By this I mean, fighting for items of little financial worth. It's pointless paying hundreds of dollars in legal fees disputing who is going to get a $50 wedding vase or a $150 stamp collection.

Another mistake is overlooking other assets such as boats, trailers, machinery, pensions, retirement funds, stocks, shares and life insurance as matrimonial property and/or financial resources.

Too many women believe that if they go "soft" on their property settlement entitlements, their husband will be easier to deal with as regards the children. This approach rarely produces the desired result. The only real outcome usually is that your spouse perceives you to be weak.

Another very common mistake is seeking divorce financial planning advice from a lawyer instead of a financial planner. What do lawyers know about financial planning?

Some women get sucked into believing that by reaching an informal agreement with their husband that is legally binding. It isn’t - even if it's written down and both parties have signed it.

Finally, too many women simply give in to their husband because that's what they’ve always done. Now is the time to stand up for your self, as you now need to be primarily concerned with your financial future!

© Barry J. Roche

Author's Bio: 

Barry is the founder of The Self-Help Club (http://www.self-helpclub.com) and the author of the ebook, “How To “Win” When Facing Divorce”. He is a former Family Law Specialist who wrote this book specifically for women. The book is available for purchase at http://www.divorceandwomen.com/help.html. Barry is also the author of a 90 page Manual on “How To Beat Your Financial Worries When You Don’t Have A Job” (also available for purchase at http://www.divorceandwomen.com/bookstore.html).