Exercises To Do Together
by Al Link and Pala Copeland


Traditionally defined as the outward and visible sign of an inner and invisible grace, a sacrament is something you elevate to the status of holy or sacred. You elevate it to this status by your choice and intention. You don’t need any one else’s permission to do this.

Time for Exercise: 15 minutes to one hour

Properties Required: none


  1. Describe to each other examples of events or experiences that are sacraments in your relationship together.
  2. Discuss what makes them worthy of their status as a sacrament. Are they one-time events or do you repeat any of them occasionally or regularly?


Marriage is widely recognized and treated as a sacrament. Have you considered renewing your vows in an annual ceremony to honor this sacrament? A vows ceremony, whether you are legally married or living common-law, is a wonderful sacrament for lovers (see Vows). Lovemaking itself is a joyous, holy sacrament, if you treat it that way. Start by declaring your intention to elevate your lovemaking to sacred sex. Proceed to create a sacred loving space (see Sacred Space). Follow any of the many excellent Tantric or Taoist sacred loving guides, for example, Pala and Al’s book Soul Sex: Tantra for Two.

An act of forgiveness to your lover can be a sacrament as well as an act of kind generosity in which you make great personal sacrifice for the well-being of your lover and your relationship.

Excerpted from our new book Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms of Body, Mind, Heart and Soul, by Al Link and Pala Copeland, Llewellyn, 2007

Author's Bio: 

Al Link and Pala Copeland own and operate 4 Freedoms Relationship Tantra. They regularly host lover’s romantic weekends near Ottawa Canada, and weeklong retreats in exotic locations. For more information call toll free from Canada or USA: 1-800-684-5308 International long distance: 1-819-689-5308. Visit their websites Tantra-Sex, Sexy Spiritual Relationships and their blog Ask About Love and Sex, or send email:

They have four books published including Soul Sex: Tantra for Two, New Page, 2003; The Complete Idiot's Guide to Supercharged Kama Sutra, Penguin, 2007; Sensual Love Secrets for Couples: The Four Freedoms Body, Heart, Mind and Soul, Llewellyn 2007; Tantra Step by Step: 28 Days to Ecstasy, Llewellyn 2007.

Additional Resources covering Tantra can be found at:

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Al Link and Pala Copeland, the Official Guides To Tantra