The most effective techniques for working a room with finesse and success

When we first receive an invitation, it is always exciting but as the date approaches, the excitement of attending the function is now turning into a chore, it is on the evening of your favorite show, your son’s hockey game or you just plain want to go home and be quiet. You may hear this little voice saying: “Why go? You don’t know a sole there, you’ll to walk around smiling hoping someone will talk to you, everybody will be busy talking to other people and they’ll never notice you.” Still, you have to go, this is your business and you have to be out there, you have to connect, shine and impress or your boss is counting on you to make an appearance and represent your company in the best possible manner. Recognize the great opportunity to meet new prospects, build on existing relationships; it is the time to show off your social savvy. Here are some of the most effective techniques to do it with finesse and success!

Preparing for the event: Your pre-function checklist
• Find out ahead of time who will be attending.
• Prepare and rehearse your self-introduction. One that is pertinent to the event.
• Make sure you have plenty of business cards.
• Think positively
• Eat before you go. This way you can mingle better, after all you were not invited because you were thirsty or hungry, you were invited for your good company.

The entrance
Don’t just arrive at a function; make an entrance! A strong entrance announces your presence and helps you establish a positive first impression. To master the art of the entrance, here are a few things to remember:

• Project confidence and purpose by standing tall and walking with a good stride as you enter the room.
• Move away from the doorway immediately after you pass through the door. Never stand in the doorway; you’ll look unsure and you’ll block other guests who wish to either enter or leave.
• You want to notice others, and be noticed; pause for a moment to determine who is present and to whom you should speak first.
• Greet and meet a few people before you head to the food table or to the bar. Remember, you are there primarily because the host feels you have something to contribute, and perhaps the host appreciates your friendship or business.

The essentials for mingling and working a room
Working a room is all about making a positive and lasting impression. Below are some pointers that can help ensure that the people you meet not only think highly of you, but remember you as well – long after the function is over:

• Act as though you belong. If you start to feel out of place, use positive self-talk to reinforce your sense of belonging. And remind yourself that you do belong – you're an invited guest!
• Act as though you are the host, instead of the guest.
• To join a conversation, say, “Excuse me, may I introduce myself ...” or “Excuse me, I could not help but overhear …” Do not, however, interrupt people who are deep in conversation.
• Remember to shake hands with everyone.
• Mingle. If it is a small gathering, try to meet everyone.
• For a large gathering, focus on key people you wish to meet.
• Gestures of affection are usually not appropriate at a business function.

When attending a function, remember to:
• Bring your sense of humour
• Mind your manners
• Remember the benefits
• Have fun doing it!

Food and drinks: Do’s and don’ts

Do …
• eat before you attend an event.
• hold your glass or plate in your left hand, your right hand should always be free to shake hands.
• hold your red wine glass by the stem or the bowl if your wine is too cold.
• hold your white wine glass by the stem – always.
• remove the pit of an olive from your mouth by cupping your hand.
• cut a piece of cheese from a large pie shape slice, lengthwise and not from the tip.
• dispose of food spoils on appropriate platter, not in the nearest plant.

Don’t …
• double-dip from the main dish.
• overload your plate.
• eat and drink at the same time.
• talk with your mouth full.
• drink and drive.

Did you know?

40% of all adults experience social anxiety
75% experience anxiety when attending a party with strangers.

Dealing with social anxiety
Social interactions can cause stress and anxiety – sometimes even in people who are generally outgoing. These negative feelings may be rooted in a fear of rejection and feelings of insecurity about our ability to “measure up” to other people. They can also be triggered by certain events in our lives: an illness, a relationship break-up, a bad day at the office. Whatever its cause, an attack of social anxiety can seriously cramp your style and detract from your professional image – if you allow it to.

Here are some things you can do to overcome social anxiety:

• Realize you're not the only one who may be feeling this way. Look around you; chances are you’ll pick up signals of anxiety from a few other guests in the room.
• Focus on someone other than yourself. If you see someone else looking anxious, approach that person, introduce yourself and start a conversation.
• Use positive self-talk to remind yourself that you have something to contribute to the gathering. For example, tell yourself “I can talk to anyone about any current topic of interest” or “I’ve just come back from a trade mission to Asia. I should approach the CEO of this company because I know he’s interested in selling to China.”
• Set a goal. Promise yourself you’ll make one new business contact this evening, or that you’ll finally set a date to have lunch with your counterpart from the district office.
• Relax – and focus on what you're doing right!

For more information on how to make proper introductions, know what to do when you forget a name, learn to read body language and work a room with class and confidence, visit our website www.corporateclassinc.com.

Corporate Class is a Leading Image and Business Etiquette consulting organization since 1981. Diane Craig, President has released a new Teleseminar The Look of Success - it is brilliantly done, rich in content and priced at an extremely low rate. See for yourself at http://www.corporateclassinc.com/teleseminar-2008-12.php.