Christmas is a time when we want to experience love, joy and peace, but for many people it’s an extremely difficult and stressful time. On the one hand, you look forward to enjoying Christmas and on the other hand, you dread what it’s really going to be like. However, Christmas can be enjoyable and these are my top 5 tips to have the Christmas you want and be more your unique self this year.

1. Define your ideal Christmas.
If you could have Christmas exactly the way you want it, ideally what would that look like, be like and feel like? Write this down and also write down what Christmas is really about for you personally. What is important to you at Christmas? Be specific and add plenty of detail. Then ask yourself, “What would it take for Christmas to be like this for me?” You don’t need to change everything in one go; even little changes add up to great things. Pick the changes you most want to make this year and perhaps let the others go for future years. Don’t expect to have your ideal Christmas this year. It’s there to work towards. What would make Christmas special for you? What’s your intention this Christmas?

2. Make choices
. You do have choices, even though Christmas is often a time when we forget this and end up going along with what others want for whatever reason. If you don’t make choices, you're likely to be left feeling a victim, and disappointed or stressed about Christmas. As you look at your definition of your ideal Christmas there will be some choices for you to make. I encourage you to make some of these choices this year and take the necessary actions to make them happen. You can have it the way you want but you’ll need to tap into your personal power and make choices. You have choices about everything, including:

• In what ways you celebrate Christmas
• The socialising you do or don’t do
• Whether you buy into the commercialism of it all
• With whom you spend Christmas
• How traditional Christmas is for you
• The food you eat
• How you spend your time. Yes, that means taking time just for you and doing whatever fills your heart and nurtures your soul.
• Asking for and accepting help

3. Drop Perfectionism
Defining your ideal Christmas, and making choices and taking actions in order to bring that into reality is not about making everything perfect at Christmas. It’s about living your life the way you want. When you’re being true to yourself, you’ll feel more peaceful, contented and joyful. Perfectionism seems to raise its head even more at Christmas and adds so much pressure. You’re a human being and that means being human, not perfect. So what if everything isn’t perfect? The world won’t end. When you find yourself heading towards perfectionism, ask yourself, “Is it really important in the big scheme of things?” Live Christmas according to what’s important to you and give up your need for perfectionism.

4. Drop the ‘shoulds’
Christmas is a time when ‘shoulds’ seem to show up even more. ‘Shoulds’ are based on other people’s expectations of us and aren’t usually what we choose to do. You do have a choice. You don’t have to go along with what you think you ‘should’ do. Notice the times when ‘should’ appears in what you’re saying or thinking, stop yourself and decide what choice you yourself truly want to make.

5. Simplify
Don’t make Christmas any more complicated. It’s easy for Christmas to be a time with lots to do and lots to buy. It can be an expensive time of year and you end up too tired and stressed to enjoy any of it. Simplify as much as you can from what you need to do, such as cooking and socialising, to what you need to buy, such as gifts, food and decorations. Before any of these lists get too big, simplify them by stepping back and deciding what Christmas means to you and how you want to spend it. Define your ideal Christmas. Keep things simple; after all it’s usually the simple things in life that bring the most joy. The tender gaze of someone who loves you, children’s hugs and kisses, the gift given with much love and thought, or time spent doing what makes your heart sing. What brings you the most joy?

What I want for you is a Christmas full of what your heart truly desires.

Author's Bio: 

Wendy works with business owners to be more effective and successful, achieving a more profitable business in less time. Click through to her site and read more of Wendy's articles and about how business coaching can take your business to the next level.