Be Quick to Listen and Slow to Speak

One of the hard lessons that I have learned in life is that it is good most of the time to just keep your mouth shut. That was a hard lesson for me because of my temperament. I used to feel that I had to have the last word in every conversation or argument, especially if I was right. I think that to some degree we all do. One lesson that I have learned in this regard is that people will not listen to anything that they do not want to hear. It doesn’t matter whether they are right or wrong. People have to take ownership of their decisions. Even when they know that they are wrong they will stand behind their mistake. There is no solution sometimes but to leave it alone.

I have been frustrated so many times when I attempted to explain a point to people that I knew was true but they wouldn’t listen. I would be determined to make my point and they would be just as determined not to hear it which would leave us at an impasse. The situation would escalate and tensions would grow until there was a real problem. I have learned now that as soon as I perceive that there will be a problem to just leave it alone and talk about something else. At this point there is no use in continuing on the same track so I just like to avoid the unnecessary drama. There are just too many other things to do in life than to get bogged down in an unproductive activity.

I have also learned to be slow to try to give advice. Things are seldom what they appear to be. When you speak on what your natural eyes tell you there is a 99.9 per cent chance that you are speaking in error. I have spoken or lashed out many times in situations that I thought were one thing but turned out to be another. We have to stop perceiving things according to our own eyes and look through the eyes of the Spirit of God. I have seen God work wonders in the lives of people several times. If we are going to speak about the shortcomings of anyone at all let it be about our own. We all have enough of our own that we can talk about them twenty four seven.

Learn to listen with your heart. When a person engages you in conversation listen to what they are saying to you from their spirit rather than from their mouth. Sometimes we have to get past our own emotions to really hear what people are trying to say. People who lack confidence in themselves will often lash out at others. This covers their doubt and is a defensive reaction to prevent then from having to look at the truth. When people are upset they may lash out at you because they need an object to use as a target of their wrath but this generally isn’t personal. Sometimes people react to the stress of the situation that they are in and have a hard time being objective about it.

If you don’t know how to help a person in a given situation its best to acknowledge that you don’t rather than trying to have something to say. A plain and simple “I’m sorry, what can I do to help,” is better than attempting to tell them why they shouldn’t be hurting.

The main thing is to listen. Sometimes people just want someone to hear them out. I have had incidents where I was trying to explain my hurt to people when they dismissed me or just changed the conversation. The worst thing that we can do sometimes is to dismiss other people’s problems. I’m not saying that their problem should become yours because that doesn’t help anyone. People often know that there is really nothing that you can do to help them solve their problems. I am not saying that we should listen to people whine but we should show concern for people with legitimate problems.The Good Life

Author's Bio: 

Cedric Rice is the founder of Riceland Enterprises, which is composed of several different business ventures. This company is currently located in Georgia.
Riceland Enterprises is one of several web sites that Mr. Rice owns and operates which is oriented towards consumers along with Military Ring Express, and Fragrance Oil Express