How To Talk To Your Husband About Being Unhappy: How To Talk To Husband About Feelings

Don't Be Afraid to Ask

You don't do this intentionally but often expect your spouse to know why your upset is unreasonable. If you're upset or mad about something, don't bottle it in. When you bottle negative emotions in, it will eventually blow up to be bigger than it actually is because of how long you held it in.

If you've notice your spouse feeling a little off or moody, don't hesitate to ask them what's wrong. Many times they may not realize exactly what's wrong yet. When you ask them what's wrong, give them time to think about it. Don't expect your spouse to be a mind reader and don't be afraid to express your emotions in a healthy and productive way either.

Turn Your Listening Skills On

One of the best ways to be better at communicating with your spouse is by listening them. When you listen to your spouse, you are showing them how much you care and respect them. It can be difficult to fully listen to what your spouse is saying when you're doing dishes or cooking dinner (or in general, multitasking).

That's why it's important for you to stop what you're doing and just listen to what your spouse is saying. Another good tip is rephrasing what you think they said. Many times people distort or misinterpret what their spouse is saying, so it's best to rephrase what they said just to make sure you guys are on the same page. This is a very effective communication technique that can do wonders to your marriage.

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Laugh Together

Sharing a good laugh with your spouse can go a long way especially when life gets tough. Life can be pretty stressful but if you and your spouse share laughter together, it makes life so much better. Because life can get so stressful at times, many people forget to laugh. Try to reconnect with your spouse through friendly teasing and flirting. When you guys are laughing together and having fun, you'll remember why you love your spouse and see how truly lucky you are to have them in your life. This also gives you a better perspective and state of mind on communicating effectively.

Increase Your Knowledge on Effective Communication

We are not born with great communication skills. Good communication is something that is learned and if you know you expressing yourself is not going to be easy, look for help. Read books, blogs, forums and use self help resources to increase your knowledge and ability to communicate. You can also do marriage retreats and special marriage communication workshops to help improve communication in your marriage.

There are many layers to the foundation in your marriage. If you can strengthen and enhance your relationship, the first step is to improve how you and your spouse communicate in your marriage.

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Many married couples face uncertain times. If you're worrying about yours, you can take steps to save it, and have a happy marriage again. Yes, you CAN prevent divorce. If you're waiting for your spouse to make the first move, stop. Chances are good that they are waiting for YOU to be the first. If you both do this, then how is your marriage ever going to start to turn around?

It's easy to turn your marriage around. It's all done in baby steps, so to speak. The first step is to bring some positive thinking back into your marriage. Right now, everything in your marriage is negative. If one of you complains, the other will follow. That's just normal behavior. BUT... When one of you says or does something POSITIVE, the other will follow.

For example:

Let's say that one day, your spouse didn't do the dishes. Instead of you saying something like 'Why didn't you do the dishes?', or 'How hard is it to wash a few dishes?', you can say 'I know you're tired, so let me help you with the dishes tonight.' or don't say anything at all, knowing that they will be done soon.

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If your marriage is having financial trouble, don't hound your spouse to get another job. You can help by getting a part time job, or finding other ways to bring some extra money into the home. Financial burden can kill a marriage fast. When your spouse sees that you are trying, a lot of the tension will ease.

Try to do some physical exercise (of any kind) with your spouse. Go to the gym together. If you can't afford to do that, then take a walk together. You can go to a park, or simply walk a few blocks around your home. You can go swimming, hiking, fishing, etc. By doing things together, especially with physical exertion, you will both feel better, because that releases a lot of the tension in your bodies. And, since you are doing it together, it will help to bring you closer together.

Don't pick on each other. If your spouse does something that annoys you, let it slide. The more little arguments you can avoid, the more (and faster) your marriage will start to heal. When you want to prevent divorce, you should do anything you can to stop the negativity in your marriage. The more good thing you can introduce, the better you will both feel. When you feel good with each other, there is no reason to want a divorce.

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If your marital situation has taken a change for the worse, your are probably wondering how to save your marriage and if it is even possible. First, yes it is possible. Second, you can begin on the road to salvaging your relationship by starting with yourself.

Your behavior and actions can make all the difference in the world, not only with how you feel about yourself but, also with the way your spouse views you. For instance, if you are always angry, upset, nagging and critical, do you think that you will be happy with yourself? Do you think your spouse will think you are the greatest person to be around? Your answer is probably no to both of those questions.

So, first, change your behavior and control your emotions. You need to have a positive frame of mind, even when you just do not feel like it. Anger will not help your marriage and it is not good for your health either. Let go of the anger and start feeling the joy in life, even in the small things.

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Your actions towards your spouse can also cause a chain reaction. A smile, a hug, or even a quick kiss would be a positive action. Doing a chore for your partner that he or she normally does or bringing a small gift like a chocolate bar will show that person through your actions that he or she is loved. No matter how frustrated you may be, instead of nagging and being critical, try complimenting your partner about their good qualities. Continue doing this and you may be surprised by your spouse's reaction.

When one person in a relationship begins to change, the other will notice and he or she will start to modify their behavior and actions as well. Get creative and think of different things you can do. Don't wait for your spouse to change or your marriage to magically get better on its own. Take charge of your situation and learn how to save your marriage now.

Couples can love one another and yet find themselves drifting apart and headed for a divorce. There are steps you can take, with or without the aid of your spouse to get your marriage back into the loving place it once was.

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What men want is a woman who is a control freak... huh? OK, well maybe not a control freak, but believe it or not, men do like to be controlled. In fact, one of the main reasons that men get into a relationship is to be controlled, ie. they were looking for the "right" lady to control them. That's not to say that us men go around in our daily lives, appraising women and actively thinking, "hmm, would she make a good master?" Whether we men like it or not, we instinctively go for women who like controlling us. You're man is just waiting for you to control him. If you don't do it, another woman will. I'll explain why we men want to be controlled (from a husband's perspective) and how you can start doing it today.

1. We look for approval

As much as us guys like to think we're independent, the ones who choose to get married ultimately have a different mindset from the single guys. Men who get married want to be controlled. By controlled, I don't mean domineering. I mean given praise. Even that sounds like we're not capable of intelligent thought. Let me put it this way; you women get married to us for the same thing, to an extent. You choose one particular man over the other 3 billion men around the world. Why? Because his opinion of you means more to you than every other man out there. His opinion validates your presence and makes you feel special. It's exactly the same with us.

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2. Passive Control

Basically, you guys aren't controlling us actively, we look for that acceptance and love from you (which is why people get married in the first place). Divorces occur when people don't feel validated or acknowledged by their spouses anymore.

We need the control to be happy. As much as we'd like to think that we control our own feelings towards ourselves, if you get married, you are doing so for validation from a 3rd party, to some extent or another.

3. How to Ethically Control Your Man

This is why the concept of brownie points even exists. In our heads, whether we acknowledge it or not, we always strive for acceptance from you, our wife. Acknowledge us, but more importantly, chastise us. Show us that you're in control and we'll respect you.

This is a new concept for a lot of women, so hopefully you can see how important it is to control your man, for the sake of your marriage. Please ladies, take control of us!

Now Listen Carefully-

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Author's Bio: 

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Divorce does not have to be your only option. Even if it feels as though your relationship can't be saved because of the ongoing conflicts between you and your spouse, it can be. There are techniques that you can begin using today that will not only stop a divorce, but will help also you build a stronger and more loving marriage.

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